you told me to never look back
as you watched me get into the taxi in the pouring rain
but I have ghosts and shotguns inside my brain
and I'm losing substance as the sand in our hourglass keeps falling towards goodbye

and now we're 96 seconds away from the breakdown

you told me that you were my hamartia
dangerous and persuasive, you began my beautiful demise
my liver bled when I kissed your vodka smile
and you were crying so I broke my kneecaps with a hammer
because splintered bones and raw, seeping blisters
scream 'do not resuscitate'

but it was only the beginning

it stayed cold and silent in our make believe sanctuary
I held onto you like a dream and called you redemption
but like all dreams, you melted into morning
and I found myself alone again
with greasy pearls of blood and heartbreak oozing out of yesterday's wounds

and now our 96 seconds are over

this feels like a suicide note.