"Lucan?" I called from the closet I was changing in. My clothes hung on hangers neatly in colored order, with several drawers underneath to hold things like my underwear and pajamas. When I first entered the large walk-in closet, I was surprised to see Lucan's side orderly with dark colors and the other half filled with my own clothes I had almost forgotten about. I blushed when I discovered the drawer full of girly underwear, some of which was not any I remembered buying. The thought of Lucan moving my underwear anywhere made my whole body turn red with embarrassment.
"Yes?" His voice was muffled from the thick doors between us. I pulled on a loose grey v-neck shirt and a pair of boxers I assumed was his that I found in one of the drawers. I mean, I know it's wrong to look through drawers but all of the pajamas in my drawer were lacy and silky and just completely awkward if found on a person like me. I couldn't even look at them let alone wear them in front of him.
I poked my head out from the closet, going red once again from the sight of him shirtless. He glanced up from the desk he was sitting at to look at me and smirked from my expression. Shaking the other thoughts from my head I opened my mouth to ask, "Are things going to be…different? I mean, from now on?"
I opened the closet door wider to let myself into the large room. I sat on the edge of the bed closest to his desk as he turned around, a thoughtful expression on his face. Lucan suddenly broke into a smile before he said, "Things haven't been different for you already?"
I gave him a small smile and shrugged. I patted the spot next time me on the bed, indicating I wanted him to join me. He seemed to think about it for a few seconds before getting out of the chair. My breath caught in my throat as I gazed at his tan body moving toward me slowly. I could feel my heart pounding in my chest, and I suddenly questioned if it was a good decision to have us share a bed tonight.
"I just meant…" I hesitated as he sat down near me, his body heat making my own rise astronomically, "with you, I guess. Are things going to change for you?" Lucan smiled again, his eyes shining at mine. I felt like I couldn't breathe when he looked at me like that. Is this how all those princesses felt? All weak-kneed and gushy inside? Well, not Meg of course. She was sort of kickass. I bet Mulan didn't feel all weak because of a guy either. Hm..
"Lana," His voice was so low that I was glad it was so quiet in this room, so I could hear him as he talked, "Ever since you've came to me, my life has changed." I guess he read my horrified expression because he then added, "For the better, of course."
I couldn't help but snort. "Oh, of course. For the better. Not like you have to start some kind of cross-species war over me like in that one movie. Not like you're going to have to take care of me all the time because I'm half moron and half dimwit. Not like you're going to be in danger now or anything."
At that thought I halted what I was saying, my jaw dropping in horror. He was looking at me with an expression that was a cross between anger and amusement. As he read my face, which was so painfully obvious for anyone to read, his face turned to confusion.
"What? What is it?"
"You can't fight." I blurted out, suddenly having to touch him to make sure he was okay. His skin felt unbearably hot beneath my hand and I shuddered.
"What are you talking about Lana…?" He said this slowly, confused as to why I was suddenly so desperate to make sure he was there.
"I won't let you. You are not going to fight and get injured and leave me all alone. It's not happening." Tears burned my eyes but I ignored them as I looked at his disgustingly handsome face. Well, it's painfully obvious that it's not disgusting. Maybe only in the sense that a face could even be that handsome without it being an angel or some other kind of godly creature.
Lucan seemed to understand my sudden grief, and took the hand that rested on his arm and dragged it to his heart. I leaned forward to follow it, my face pressing against his bare chest.
"Lana, no matter what happens, I will never leave you alone. I will always come back for you. Always." I listened to his heart beat before taking a deep breath of my own, it somehow becoming shaky.
"You better." I whispered, closing my eyes peacefully. His grip tightened on me before he wrapped an arm around my back to draw slow circles that soothed the tension I had built up. I squeezed my eyes further and gave out a soft laugh.
"Don't comfort me, Lucan. Not when I should be the one comforting you." His eyebrows shot up in surprise before he smirked.
"And how are you going to do that?" I wiggled my eyebrows suggestively.
"I can think of a few ways." His eyes darkened considerably. The hand on my back stopped forming the circles to reach up to my neck under my long blonde hair. He tilted my head back to look at him properly before his lips descended on mine.
The magnetic pull was back, sending me flying against his body in desperation to ease the force in whatever way I could. It wasn't just pulling me to him, it was pushing me until there was an electric energy between us that I could almost see.
He felt it, too. I could tell by the way he urgently grasped my waist, gripping the t-shirt that covered my torso. He grasped it tight enough for it to expose some of the skin on my stomach and back, but his hand didn't stray any farther.
His lips molded against mind, urgently and passionately. I responded in the only way I knew how, in some natural way to ease the strain we both felt. I felt him moving me, pulling my body under his own until his chest was pressed against mine. I gasped when I felt his tongue lick my bottom lip, and then slid into my mouth. My hands gripped his shoulders, and my nails dug into his back in, what I'm pretty sure was, a painful way.
"Lana," He gasped, pulling away to rest his forehead against mine. The pull between us increased and I groaned with what felt like agony but might have been desperation. "We should stop. We need to stop."
"No." I shook my head, reaching one of my arms to curl around his neck and bring his head back down to mine. "Please, no. It hurts when you stop, just…don't." He looked anguished, his expression mirroring mine before dragging his lips down to mine again. This time it was brutal, his mouth slanted against mine in a way that I probably should have minded, but didn't.
My hips at their own accord rose up to press against his as his tongue, once again, slid into my mouth. We both groaned at the contact and my nails dug deeper into his back.
I didn't even realize after a few seconds that he had stopped and sprung away from me, breathing heavily.
"Why," I was blushing but felt undeniably unsatisfied, "did you stop?" He took a deep breath through his nose, then shut his eyes and exhaled.
"You would regret it, Lana. I told you that the bond between us gets…stronger…the longer we wait. But I know you would regret it if we did something in a…moment of passion." He seemed to find the choice of words humorous, but I found nothing funny in the situation.
Although the longing for him seemed to increase with the distance he put between us, I knew what he was saying was true. I'd never even kissed a guy before him, let alone anything beyond that. It was just too hard to remember when dealing with Lucan, when everything just felt right.
I nodded and sighed, and patted the place on the bed beside me. Lucan looked at me warily before glancing at the doors that led to the living room area. "I should probably sleep on the couch." I scrunched my nose at him.
"Look, I'm not going to seduce you or anything, alright? I just…want you to be close." After the words left my mouth I realized that there was a possibility of being rejected. I hadn't been thinking of it before, not when we were together like that. But the way he drew away, needing more space than I did, was definitely a clue.
"It wouldn't be the best idea, Lana." His voice was soft, but firm. He leaned over to kiss my forehead before he pulled away completely.
I saw him exit the room, shutting the doors behind him with a soft thud. I stared after him for a few minutes, thinking he was going to come back when he thought I was asleep. The lights were off, but I don't remember when or who made that happen. It must have been half an hour before I resigned myself to the fact that he wasn't coming back. I got under the covers of the bed and fell asleep pretty quickly.
The next morning I woke up to silence. There was sun streaming in through the window, but I couldn't hear anything outside. I stretched my arms before throwing off the covers to get dressed.
I didn't hear any movement in the room outside, and briefly wondered whether or not Lucan was still asleep or just gone. I hoped for the former, but knowing my luck I would be left alone for the day. Again.
I don't blame them, don't get me wrong. I understand completely that they have a lot on their plates. That there are vampires out there trying to kill them, and wild werewolves that have been killing prominent members of their pack.
I just hate being alone, if you haven't noticed. I don't do well on my own, and bad things just tend to happen.
I wandered into the closet to look at the clothes. I recognized maybe less than half of the items hanging on the hangers, the rest seemed unfamiliar. It looked like the half I was unfamiliar with was full of lacy material and soft pastels. I fingered a soft, light pink dress in my hands before taking it off the hanger. It was a little above knee-length, with small straps, a fitted top and a flowy skirt. I grabbed some underwear from the drawer, trying not to blush as I quickly took a pair of panties and a bra.
I showered and dressed quickly, relishing in the time I had to myself to relax. My mind couldn't help but stray to Jayce, and to the night in that old church building where we danced. The idea of it being all a ruse, some spell I was under and didn't even know it blew my mind. I don't recall being manipulated that much, but maybe I'm just honestly too stupid to tell the difference. I frowned at the thought, trying to dispel those ideas from my mind.
I didn't want to put on shoes, and opted for being barefoot. My stomach grumbled and I quickly decided to make my way to the kitchen. However hard that may be.
I love breakfast food. I mean, breakfast food at any time of the day is the best, but just the kinds of food served for breakfast is amazing. That's why I love going to places that serve it all day. Like, why wouldn't you serve that all day? Lots more money could be made, I'm sure.
As I thought about eating French toast, I realized I had no idea where I was going. The living room area of the bedroom, as I had assumed, was empty. I just walked into the hallway when I realized I wasn't even sure I knew where I was, let alone get to where I was going.
Why don't they ever give me directions? Or instructions? Or a map?
There wasn't anybody around, either, to ask for directions. I 'hmmed' to myself, wandering down the corridor. Surprisingly, I recognized Lucan's study, and oriented myself as to where I was. He wasn't in the study itself, and I frowned at the emptiness of the room. Why wasn't anybody ever here when I woke up..? Did they honestly think I was capable of taking care of myself?
I wandered down the rest of that hall, and turned down another vaguely familiar wing of the giant house. I finally saw a person wandering around the corner before I shouted, "Hey! Wait, please!" The person, a man, faltered before looking back down the hall to me where he was about to leave.
He was Lucan's age, maybe a year younger, but definitely older than me. He was somewhat attractive, not exactly my type though. He was strongly built, with large muscles and brown hair that curled around his ears.
"Can you point me in the direction of the kitchen, please?" He squinted at me for a moment.
"What are you doing here? Aren't you supposed to stay in your room?" I snorted.
"A room without food is hardly a room."
We both frowned as we thought about what I just said. After a few moments he nodded in agreement. "Alright, well I guess I'll come with you. I'm hungry myself." I grinned brightly, grabbing onto his giant arm.
It was surprisingly a short trip to the kitchen, shorter than I remembered it being. The kitchen was the same, and I sat down in the same table I had a few days (weeks?) ago, only this time with a different man.
"So…" I started, staring awkwardly down at my hands, "I'm Lana. It's nice to meet you."
The guy, who still hadn't introduced himself yet, grunted. I scrunched my nose at the noise before shrugging to myself. If he didn't want to say his name I wasn't going to make him.
"What do you want to eat?" He asked, sticking his head through a myriad of cupboards. I shrugged again.
The guy stopped rummaging through the cabinets to stare at me. He finally nodded, pointing to the fridge that contained the eggs and dairy, and another few cupboards which I assumed was the spices and bread.
The nameless man then left the room and I sighed, grateful for the pleasant view outside the window and the meaningless task I had ahead of me.
I made the food slowly, and after cooking it, I ate it just as slow. It wasn't hard for me to remember the recipe; it was one my mom used to make me all the time when I was younger.
When I was done I washed the dishes and stood in the kitchen for a few more minutes before sighing again. The silence was killing me, marking a dull humming noise in my mind. I sat down again at the table, resting my chin in the palm of my hand. There's nothing really to do here, when you think about it..
I mean, I'd like to say my story is interesting and every moment was never dull and there was always some drama like Lucan's twin coming back to take over the pack, or some crazy jealous ex of his that wanted to kill me. The most I could even consider drama was Jayce, and even right now, for me, he is out of the picture.
What next then?
Are things really going to be that different for me?
Lucan would never let me get involved in any of the actual business of the fighting. I doubt he'd even let me know if things were going horribly wrong or not.
Did he not trust me?
Did he not want to trust me?
I just wanted someone to include me on what was going on. My parents died for this. I sort of deserve to know, right?
It's been so long and honestly this just feels like a filler chapter to me anyway. I'm just trying to figure out where I was going with this story haha. I'll brainstorm with a few people and figure it out so it doesn't take as long for me to finish this story. I apologize!