She loved him. He was always there for her when she needed an ear to listen, a shoulder to cry on or someone to understand. Her heart belonged to him, there was no mistaking it. It beat faster whenever she was near him. Her pulse raced whenever he looked at her. Her knees shook whenever he touched her which was once in a blue moon and he never touched her in the way she wanted him to. Did he even want her? He was the kind of man that girls were warned about; dark, mysterious, gorgeous, bad, rebellious. But he was not that way around her. Sure he was mysterious and gorgeous but the others he never was in her presence. Why? Because she was merely fifteen and he was twenty-two? That was another problem. Their age differences. Plus, he did not love her. He loved no one. Why does he listen to her then? He must like her somewhat. He probably just sees her as a friend or little sister, nothing more. The thought tore at her.

At night, she would lie awake for fear of falling asleep to be attacked by dreams of his face and voice. Never would he want a girl such as her. He had women at his beck and call, could get whoever he wanted. Too bad he did not want her. The thought of him with another woman made her jealous. It made her want to hit someone. She should have been smarter, known that this would happen one day. But, being a fool, had let it happen knowing all along that it could never be. For he was what every woman hungered after, including her. But she could not have him. Ever.

Stupid hopes and dreams had always plagued her; hopes that he would one day see her as more than a little girl and dreams that he would make sweet love to her, that he would be her first. She has never been kissed. What would he kiss like? Would he be rough and demanding? Or would he be gentle? The very contemplation made her shiver in anticipation of a kiss that would never come except in her dreams. In her dreams, he was an incredible lover with a gentle embrace and slow, patient strokes. He never rushed her, always gave her pleasure and she explored his body in kind, learning every muscle, every hard edge. He was so strong.

But it was like he was a god and she a mere mortal who would never get the chance to experience what it would be like with him. How she ached to feel it all; his strong arms around her, his lips pressed against hers, his hard body against hers, his big hands touching her with expert fingers. But most of all, his eyes glazed over with lust and love for her and only her. She wanted to be the only one in his life. The idea was ludicrous. It would never be. She would just torture herself with her thoughts and dreams but with the knowledge that it would never satisfy her.


He wanted her. There was no mistaking it. He got hard whenever she was near him, whenever she stared at him with innocent eyes. Always he had to restrain himself from touching her. It was forbidden. Their age differences were not the only thing stopping him but also the fact that she was a virgin, a child, innocent. He would not touch her in such a way without being disgusted with himself afterwards. Girls like her have been warned about men like him; dark and dangerous. But he never acted that way with her. Why? It was a mystery even to him. Maybe because a girl of her age should not have to see what he really was? He was bad, rebellious, arrogant and could be an ass sometimes. She was the complete opposite of him; small, shy, kind, sweet, gentle, followed the rules, good. She was also beautiful. When she grew older, no man would pass up the opportunity to ask her out. The thought made him blind with jealousy.

When night fell and he slept, dreams of her came to him, of her small hands on his body, of him touching her in places where she probably did not even know existed, of his kissing her until she was breathless and moaning for him not to stop. She was a strange one though; too trusting. She trusted him not even two days after meeting him one year ago. Never in his wildest imagination did he ever think he would lust after a kid especially her. He could get any woman he wanted but it was her he wanted. The one he wanted was the one he could not have. Life was unfair sometimes.

Fantasies of making love to her and giving her such pleasure always filled his mind. How he wanted to kiss her full lips, touch her small body. But he could not. Even if she let him, even if he let himself, would he be so overcome with desire that he was rough? Or would he take care and time not to hurt her, to make sure she only received ecstasy instead of pain? He did not know and he never would for she was not his and never would be. She was just a girl and he, a man. A sick man who was disgusted with himself for fantasizing about a girl six years younger than him. Not to mention, it was illegal therefore, it was forbidden.

But how he ached to feel her body against his, her lush curves pressed to the hard planes of his body, her lips opening to him, her hands on him and his on hers. Most of all, she would never think of another man when with him. When she was with him, she would be with him. She would moan his name and his only. She would want him and him only. She would beg for more. Banishing the thoughts from his mind and libido did not help because they always came back to haunt him. Even though it was forbidden and sick, he would only dream of her but never be fully satisfied.