Finding It Harder to Breathe

&& when i see him,

my heart flutters for a moment,

my throat closes,

i find it harder to breathe.

i catch myself on the verge of tears

remembering us together.

then i come crashing back

to this hell of a life,

&& i realize again that its over,

&& my heart shatters to pieces.

when he talks about her,

i listen, & try to be a friend.

but every time he says her name,

i find it harder to breathe.

i know how he feels about her,

he used to feel that way about me,

&& seeing her gorgeous face

reminds me of what i'm not.

it reminds me he no longer loves me,

i'm just a girl to him.

but that other girl is so much more,

shes everything to him.

&& every time i think of them,

i find it harder to breathe.