A stupid yacht. That's where it began. I begged him to let me stay home, I even told him I'd let him fuck me in the ass. That's how crazy I get when I beg. But he made me come, and told me he'd still fuck me in the ass for being so difficult. I never win.

The yacht was full of men. Hungry, horny men. Each one brought along their own gift for the yacht. I was Victor's gift. For an entire night, he was going to let other men touch me. He would let other men use me as they pleased, degrade me, abuse me, fall in undeniable lust with me. And this is what I once wanted. I wanted to be abused, and hurt, and used until my heart finally stopped beating.

I figured, maybe if I got hurt enough, nothing would hurt anymore. I wanted pain to feel like breathing. I wanted to be a used product that never gets old, and never breaks. I was half-way there, or so I thought. Victor told me the yacht would help, he said it would make me feel more like a life-less product, rather than a living, breathing woman that needs love. I was so scared. I trusted Victor to hurt me, but not strangers. And that's what they were. Complete strangers.

Victor told me I'd be the most wanted item on the ship, and that made me even more scared. I could see hundreds of men, hungry for those little moments of orgasmic release, I could see them holding whips and cuffs and whatever else they could use to get me to submit to their every demand. Hundreds. I didn't know my limits, I didn't know how much I could handle.

The first man liked breathplay and blow jobs.

The second man liked to turn a spanking into a bloody massacre.

The third man pierced my clit with a dirty needle. My screaming made him release his disgusting orgasm all over my face.

After the third man, Victor let me have a break. He left me alone just for a moment, while he went to the bathroom. I panicked, and I ran. He wouldn't be far behind me, I knew that. I had to keep running, I couldn't stop, once he caught me... I didn't know what he'd do. I got to the end of the yacht, and I stared into the cold, heartless ocean. I was sure the ocean could do more damage than any of the men could. I had to make a choice. None of my options were pleasant, and I didn't need them to be. I didn't want it to be easy. This was my moment. This was what I'd been waiting for, I just didn't think it would happen so soon. I couldn't think of a better way to die, and I could hear Victor's booming voice getting closer. His rage was absolutely terrifying, yet comforting. I was so sick of comfort.

I stood up on the railing and I looked at the black sky, one last time.

I gazed at the pale moon, for I never would again.

I watched the stars shine endlessly, so beautifully...

And I jumped, Victor's hand grazed my ankle, he tried to stop me. My final human touch. So gentle.
I didn't dare close my eyes as I fell, I wanted to see everything. Even though there was nothing to see.

Just a black ocean, and a black sky.

The ocean churned and raged, waiting for me. It wanted me. Wanted to swallow me whole, and never give me back.

Just before I hit, I shut my eyes, and icy needles pierced my entire body. The pain was so real, so strong... it consumed all of me. The entirety of myself was immersed in indescribable agony. And for the first time in my life, I felt alive.

I started to sink deeper and deeper into my massive tomb. The deeper I sank, the less pain I felt. And there was a point, where I didn't feel anything. Water deprives you of everything.

I couldn't see, or hear. I couldn't feel, or taste, or smell. I was numb. Totally and completely numb. I wanted this so bad. It was time. My lungs needed air, and I didn't have any to give them. I struggled and fought to hold my breath for just a moment longer. Moments felt like hours, and I held onto them dearly. I never said I wanted this to be quick. I wanted it to last. I wanted to get the most out of my death.

I kicked and punched and struggled helplessly. And then, the water pushed me. Pushed me up. I was being pushed back to the surface. In a desperate attempt to remain numb and helpless, I clawed the water, trying to pull myself back down. I tried so hard.

I burst back to the surface, back to life, gasping for air.

The wind swept a cold breeze over my face. My name filled the air, getting more distant by the second. The salt pricked my taste buds back to life, and the moon lit my eyes so bright. I was alive again. My old life was gone, slowly drifting away. I could swim away, anywhere I wanted. I'd find land eventually.

Finally, for the first time in my pathetic existence, I chose to live.