25Chapter one
I sat down in a fetal position at the back of the school, waiting for him.
"I need to talk to you," he looked at me worriedly.
"I need to go to-" I paused and said, "Okay, I'll squeeze you a little time." He looked at me hesitating a little.
"Never mind, I'll talk to you after school then. Meet me behind the school when you finish; I'd be there waiting.."
I went closer to him to touch his face, "Don't worry, I'll be there as soon as possible." and I shivered as he enveloped me with his warm body.
His lips hovered over mine and we shared a light kiss. It was so simple, and sweet; I wanted to continue, but I had to go.
"I love you," I whispered, and he released me from our hug and I gave his hand a squeeze before going.
"I'd be there waiting.."
Then where are you? I waited for an hour in the cold winter, and he still wasn't here.
Did something happen to him? I started to worry, and I took out my cellphone to call him- but I put it back.
It's okay.. he'll be here, I said to myself. He'll be here..
"Erin?" I turned my head and saw Eric, and smiled at him. He came and sat down next to me.
"What are you doing here?" He asked.
"Sitting as if I was in my mother's womb again," I smiled, and he raised an eyebrow.
"Wouldn't you be naked?" He asked while looking over my jacket and jeans.
"I said sitting, not acting," I replied looking away.
"That's a pity.. it would've been nice to see-"
"-See what? Huh, see what?!" I intervened, and gave him the look that dared him to answer.
He only chuckled.
"That's what I thought- what are you doing here anyway?"
"I just had basketball, you?"
"Waiting for mi- I mean, Aiden," I smiled suddenly thinking of when I first confessed my feelings to him.
"Thanks for coming," I said as I smiled at him when he walked to me.
"For you, I'd always," he replied, flashing me one of his smiles that always caused my heart to flutter.
I chuckled and I started to confess, "Aiden... I-I just wanted to say that I.. really like you. Maybe even love. I know you don't feel the same way, since you have other girls who are much more suitable for you than me. But, just because I love you, I hope this won't really ruin our friendship- because I know you don't love me back. It's okay, I learned to accept the fact."
After I said this, I hadn't noticed I was holding my breath, and I had exhaled . When I looked up at Aiden's expression, he looked hostile and hesitant, and my heart sank.
He hates me, was the thought that came to my mind at that moment. I felt embarrassed and stupid. said, "Sorry, I.. have to go now." I turned around and took two steps to start running, but he caught my wrist and jerked me to his chest, then what happened next was absolutely unexpected.
He kissed me.
He kissed me.
My brain was hyperventilating, and my heart was sprinting as I felt the kiss intensify. By now the water in my eyes disappeared, and only happiness conjured through my whole system. We parted, breathing heavily with our lips inches apart, and I looked at him with curiosity.
Did this mean he loved me back? He suddenly smiled and said, "This does ruin our friendship." He kissed me again, and whispered to my ear, "Because we're in love with each other."
There was a silent pause now.
"You.. you love him, right?" Unlike his usual tone, he sounded serious.
"I do," I answered.
"What about me?"
"What about you?" I chuckled out.
"Do you love me?" He asked almost like a child.
"Of course I love you- you're Eric, my best friend ever since elementary-"
"-No! I don't give a shit about that, I mean; do you love me?" He asked again. I couldn't answer him- although I loved him, I never loved him the way I loved Aiden. I couldn't have loved Eric even if I tried... even if I lost everything I had.
"Eric- are you okay?" I asked warily standing up now. He stood as well, and pinned me to the brick wall with his hands gripping onto my shoulders.
"No," he muttered angrily, "You know Erin- you are just.. so dense." he forced out a laugh, "All these years of our friendship, I've been loving you the way you love Aiden. Yet, you don't appreciate me, you don't care about me, you just don't see me! What can I do to make you mine? What can I do so that you'd want me? Tell me what to do so that you'd want me like I want you."
"Let me go, Eric," I said with force. He relaxed his grip on my shoulders, and hugged me.
"I'm.. I'm sorry, Eric. I truly am," I whispered, I pitied him, and felt ashamed for it.
"If you're that sorry, would you break up with Aiden for me?" He pulled away from me, and observed me with eyes that pleaded me to say yes. I looked at my feet for a moment, and rose to meet eye contact.
"No," I replied, "I wouldn't."
His eyes narrowed, and he walked away from me.
I took a minute standing in silence, and after that I turned around and noticed Aiden walking to me. I smiled at him, but his eyes were distant. His eyes were usually like topaz, but that moment, it was a dark brown. I went to him, and put an arm around his waist and dug my head in his chest. But as soon as I did, my arms were off of him, and he was gripping my wrists to my sides, with an unreadable expression on his face.
"Is something wrong?" I questioned, looking up at him.
He hesitated for a moment, then clearly he spoke, "Erin, you and I can't be together anymore," I tried not to look surprised.
He breaking up with me- I knew it was coming.. I knew I didn't deserve him, and I knew.. the risk for myself of being with him.. since every other girl had wanted him. I suddenly remembered the several number of times how Chelsea Evans and her crew bruised me with their stilettos, stepping all over me to make me break up with Aiden. I tried to, I really did- but Aiden was too observant, and he found out about them. I thought of it now that it should've been better if I had, it would've been much less painful than this, I knew.
I laughed comically and smiled, "Is it so hard saying 'let's break up'? No need to re-word it in other terms, I already knew this was coming Aiden. " I replied, my voice controlled. He gave me a cold glare to the point where I felt like I had holes in my eyes.
"I'm glad you accept it with such ease, I didn't think you'd be able to catch the euphemism." he replied icily. I tried not to wince from his words.
"I won't be needing this anymore," I took my necklace off, and gave out my hand to give it to him.
"No," he pushed my hand to my jacket pocket.
For a moment, I thought he was going to contradict about this whole thing he was doing. Maybe it was a joke- or, or just something he planned to surprise me, and I wanted to look at his eyes to figure it out- but I only stared at the ground. I knew he would've been able to read the immediate hope in my eyes.
"I don't want to have something that you have held," he explained curtly.
I felt my heart drop to my stomach.
"What a fool I am for loving you.." I muttered lowly, I wanted to look at him- but I couldn't look at him anymore.
I tried to say my words like I approved of this separation. "I'm sorry I wasn't good enough for you," however my voice cracked and it turned out sounding like a whimper.
My vision blurred from the tears that were longing go fall. I shut my eyes so that tears won't fall- however, it just had to escape through my eyelids, and that's when I ran. I ran, and hoped I was a good half-mile away from him. The only thing that went through my mind while I was running was: He doesn't love me at all... all this time, it's only been me who loved him.
Dreadfully, it was true. While I was in my own despair, I saw a little boy who slipped from the ice and fell on the streets. I looked at the streets and saw a speeding truck coming by.
He was going to get hit, and I had to get him out of the way.
And so I did.
I pushed the boy, but as soon as I did, I faced the bright headlights and the last thing I heard was the screeching tires in the dark, cold evening.