Authors Note: Breaks...Story Change
"Why didn't you tell me, Marisa?" He screamed at me over the noise of the busy subway. I couldn't believe he'd found out, damn Becca and her big mouth.
"I don't know. I was just scared."
"What did you think? That I would chuck you?" Tears brimmed my eyelids, my heart raced,
"I don't know Tony, it just happened."
"It's my problem too, Marisa." I couldn't believe he was being so understanding. Tony was usually so—well, hot-headed. He typically worked on pure adrenaline and impulse, but the way he was speaking now made me think he had really thought about what he was saying. "I mean, I was angry at first when Mikey saw you at that clinic with Tommy." Tommy was Tony's brother; he worked at a health center on the upper-east-side. "I just really wish it was me and not him."
"I'm so sorry Tony." Tears poured down my face, I couldn't bear to lose him over something so trivial.
"I just want to know why you didn't tell me." His eyes were pleading. I decided I should bite the bullet. I took a deep breath before I spoke,
"It didn't mean anything." His eyes grew wide with shock.
"He kissed me." I sobbed.
"Who the hell did you kiss, Marisa?"
"I thought you knew!"
"What were we just talking about then?"
"I thought you got an abortion!"
"Mikey saw you and Tommy hugging at the clinic the other day and said you looked upset."
I gasped with shock.
"Who the hell did you kiss? Tell me!" I couldn't believe this was happening. Worst of all, I was the cause. It was actually laughable when I looked back on it; I never had to tell Tony a thing. But I did.
"Your brother." Way to bite the bullet Marisa.
"I'm ready." I lay on the bed looking up at him. He looked down at me like I had just grown a second head, eyes wide with shock.
"What!?" He was smiling, attempting to hide his building excitement. "I don't mean to sound surprised but the other day when we talked you—"
"I was still unsure how I felt." I knew I was sure now. It was a big step but I was ready to take it. And plus, I knew how happy it would make him. I could already see the joyful smirk across his face. I reached up and kissed him softly, "I love you."
He leaned over me and I felt the heat from his body radiating onto mine. "Are you sure?" I nodded.
"It's okay." I smiled. He was always so gentle and caring. His lips once more met mine. We were locked in and embrace so passionate that it rocked me to the core. My breath was suddenly grasped form my body. His hand slowly traced the edge of my hip, I shuddered. "Thom." I whispered lightly. He was now kissing my neck, letting his mouth linger on the hollow of my throat.
"Don't worry Kristi." He spoke softly into my ear. I felt the edges of his mouth turn up into a smile. I felt his hand slowly moving to my belt. He laced his fingers in the buckle and began to undo it.
"Whoa!" I pushed him up. His face was shocked, almost dumbstruck.
"What happened to waiting, Thom?" I asked, outraged that he would even try such a thing.
"What happened to 'I'm ready'?"
"Answer that one." He replied smugly. He must have mistaken my confusion for speechlessness.
"I was talking about meeting you parents!" I couldn't believe he though I said we could— "You know, what we talked about yesterday."
He half sighed, half grimaced as realization splashed across his face. It was as if I had just clicked on the light-bulb of his hormone filled brain.
"Oh," he said simply.
I knew how he felt. I could see it in his eyes. God, they were so beautiful. And you know what? At that moment, time stopped. It was as if God was giving me time to assess the scene, time to decide.
I slowly observed his face. His full lips, rose, a little chapped from the bitter wind of January. They were turned up in this pleading grin, but his eyes. His eyes betrayed him. They were beautifully hazel and shinning, I could see the pain, and it reverberated through me like lightning. My knees weakened and I nearly lost my balance. I grabbed my chest as if I was keeping my heart from leaping towards him.
"No." I couldn't believe such utter and complete blasphemy had escaped my lips. But he smiled.
"Look me in the eye." I was so scared. "If you're so sure, looked me in the eyes and say it." I was afraid. I knew if I looked once more into those hurt filled eyes, I would surely break into a million pieces. But when I looked, he was smiling. A real smile, it radiated through his whole body, even his eyes.
"I—"I stammered. "I've never loved you." I had to look down as I spoke. I suddenly felt a presence by my side. I felt I hand under my chin.
"You a good a liar as ever, my love." I struggled against his hold, but feebly. Your body is not meat to fight against itself. His lips pressed against mine ever-so-lightly. The stubble from his beard tickling my cheek.
"I can't love you Toby." He smiled. His fingers lightly traced the hollow behind my ear.
"Too late." My heart fluttered, and my lips pressed against his once more. "You can't choose who to fall in love with, you can't."
"I love you, Toby." I whispered in his ear. His chest shook lightly against my body in silent laughter.
"I love you too, Jason."