Jun. 27th, 08 - I've decided that i will attempt to edit and maybe rewrite this story.

This was originally my first story ever written here. Re-reading it made me realize that the idea was good, but the process of getting it out there was not so great.

This is a slash story, so you know, beware.

I awoke with a start when my alarm went off at six in the morning. God, what freaking idiot on the school board decided that school should start at seven? I was having a dream but I can't seem to recall it now. All I know is that it involved the same guy that I've been secretly crushing on for almost a year now. I'm pathetic, I know, Amelie tells me everyday. Every single freaking day.

I could barely hear anything in the house as I left for school. Everyone got to sleep in, it was so unfair. As I walked, I could see Amelie in my peripheral vision coming towards me, but I pretended to not notice and picked up the pace. Of course, she caught up anyways.

"Morning Avery!" she said in the utmost annoying chipper voice.

"Ugh. It's not morning Amelie; it's fucking barely dawn for fuck's sake."

"Oh, you're never the morning person. So, sleep well?" she said that last sentence with an air that I knew she knew that I dreamt of him last night. Mother fucking hell, I tell her once, ONCE, and she will pester me about it forever.

I just grunt in response while giving her a sideways glare.

"OH! I JUST KNEW IT!" she for some fucking reason decided to shout that in my fucking ear.

"Ameliant, shut the fuck up, it is too fucking early!" I didn't want to be mean, it's just I'm REALLY not a morning person okay?

Yes, her real name isn't Amelie, it's Ameliant. Who fucking names their kid that? Her workaholic mother who on the side is also an alcoholic, that's for sure.

"You don't have to be so mean about it. Just because you're so pathetic and won't do anything about it except have wet dreams about him, don't take it out on me." She scoffs and walks faster towards the bus stop.

Great, now I made her mad at me. She's one of my very few friends. It's not like I'm antisocial, it's just I rarely like anybody. High school kids can be so fucking annoying. You may wonder why the hell I'm friends with someone who appears to be so fucking annoying and chipper but that's just how she likes to appear to people, the chipper not annoying.

We only have to stand at the bus stop for a minute before it comes. I obviously stand away from the obnoxious people and the weed smokers in that dark corner. I just sit in the uncomfortable pleather seat quietly and listen to my ipod so Amelie can calm down and become her chipper self again. Also, get some silence while I try to drown out the fucking shit playing on the radio.

It takes ten minutes to get to school. We got off the bus and it was rather hot. I still wore a hoodie though, I didn't really care. If I got a heat stroke, so be it. I left Amelie at her locker to disgust some gossip with Emily and made my way through the crowd to get to first period. Emily is okay, I guess, but she talks way too much.

I could hear Amelie shouting, "See you later alligator!" I tried to ignore her.

My math class was boring as hell. There was one upside though, he is in it too. Well, I was lucky but yet cursed, he is in three of my classes. While attempting to pretend I'm paying attention, I have to prevent myself from staring at him so I won't make anyone start to think something is going on in my head.

My school is cool with the gays and all. We do have a Gay Straight Alliance, and no I'm not in that shit. The thing is I don't know if the guy I like is even gay. I rarely talk to him. I rarely talk to anyone really. He's polite though. He doesn't pick on the nerds, he doesn't give the teachers trouble, and he'll talk to you if you talk him.

Guys like Andy, who is flamboyant as can be, you can tell he's gay. Or those drama guys who wear tight black clothes and talk about musicals and lgbtq movies. The emo ones are hard to get though, they could be gay, bisexual, or even fucking straight.

But the guy I like, you can't tell.

I made it to lunch and dropped onto the grass in our usual area. My circle as you could call it consists of Jamie, Allen, Tyler, Ariel, and of course Amelie. They were talking about some artsy movie playing in the theater downtown. Amelie shared her sandwich with me and I ate it quietly while listening to their conversation.

I saw him across from our spot talking to his usual group of friends. God, he looked good today. His skin was light but slightly tanner. He probably went to the beach this weekend. His dark brown hair was sort of wavy and it seemed shorter. It was a cross between emo and surfer hair. He was wearing a light mint green and white stripped dress shirt and form fitting jeans. When he scanned the courtyard with those piercing green eyes, I just wanted to run over there and jump him.

But of course I didn't. I have more sense than that. Sheesh.

As I watched him, I realized that I didn't see him in second period like usual. He was in first. I just figured he skipped. I guess it's a good thing I didn't notice, it means I'm not obsessed like Amelie likes to think.

When the bell rung, I left the group and walked to Chemistry.

Amelie ran up to me and shoved me softly. "Why don't you wait for me? We go the same way, gosh."

I just gave her a noncommittal grunt.

She was yapping on about things that they were talking about during lunch when I wasn't paying attention. I just nodded to let her see that I was listening. She veered off to go to her class a little later and I walked into Chemistry.

I don't have a lab partner because there's an uneven number of students, I'm thankful because I don't have to work with the freaking nitwits and dimwits. Just because I don't focus or speak in class doesn't mean I'm an idiot. My teachers get that impression from me the first time. They're pretty surprised when I ace all their tests or answer a question when I'm absolutely forced to. There are some who are skeptical so they look into my transcript. They leave me alone when they realize that I've never gotten a B in my life.

So, I'm sitting there trying to block all the useless and idiotic things my fellow classmates are going on about. Mrs. Kane tells everyone to shut the fuck up. Okay, not really, she just told them to be quite and start their bell work. It finally gets quite and I get some peace and quite. I hear the door close and look up.

There is Edmund, my crush. Well people call him by his middle name, James but I like Edmund. He walks to the teacher's desk and shows her what appears to be his schedule. She looks up and points to my table.

He starts to walk over.

And all that is going on is my head is, "Fuck Fuck Fuck Fuck Fuck Fuck," in the beat of that song that goes, "And it goes around the world just la la la la la la la." Shut up, you know it's catchy.

He smiles at me when I get the courage to look up and sit up straight. My lips twitch in a feeble attempt at a smile and I look back at my paper. He places his backpack on the table and sits down on the stool.

"Hey, Avery right?" he speaks softly so no one else can distinguish his words.

"Y-yeah." Fuck, I hate it when I stutter. So I clear my throat and said it again, "Yeah."

"I had to switch classes to get into painting this semester."

I give him this look that I'm not sure how he or even I would interpret.

"Just in case you're curious because I wasn't in second period today. I know you probably don't care but just wanted to put it out there." He says with a genuine smile.

"Oh." I say, so pathetic I know. Here is my dream guy, literally, speaking so politely to me and all I say is OH?!

So I try to make up for it.

"So, why painting?" I say in a whisper because I didn't want to draw attention to us.

"I always wanted to paint but my friend wanted me to take Life Skills with him last semester so we could get it out of the way. It is a required credit to graduate after all."

"Oh, that's nice." Seriously, what the fuck is wrong with me?!

"Yeah, I can tell you paint because you carry those big portfolios around sometime."

"Um..yeah. I'm not that good though. Painting really isn't my thing; I'm more of a photography and film person."

"That's cool, so you're like the artsy type, yeah?"

"Yeah…I guess you could say that."

"Well, I think it suits you. I could see you doing something along those lines one day."

"Thanks?" I really didn't know what else to say…

Mrs. Kane got up at that moment and gave us the instructions for our lab today. Apparently, we were burning gummy bears. How fun.

"Let's get started shall we?" he said enthusiastically after Mrs. Kane was done.

"Okay." I said, smiling at his enthusiasm.

This was going to be an interesting semester.

Amelie is going to pester me about this nonstop later.