Dear You,

Today would be the 7-year anniversary of our friendship, if we were still friends. This would also be the 7th year that I was in love with you, if I was still in love with you. Oh how the time has passed. I don't know where you are at the moment and I don't care, I haven't cared for two years now. You could be in north eastern school, or maybe just across south oyster bay road, in your house with your mother and brother. You're the man of that house, but not much of a man if you ask me. A real man wouldn't have stopped talking to his best friend once he found out that she was in love with him. A real man would have come to visit said best friend when she was out of school. You're not a man, you're a little boy…a little boy who doesn't know how to be considerate of others.

I bet you didn't know that for years I dreamed of dating you. I wanted to date you so badly, and I wanted to call you my boyfriend. You were everything I wanted, though now that I look back on it, I don't know why I wanted you to begin with. You were obnoxious, big mouthed and opinionated. Everyone hated you, but not me. I loved you. Despite how many horrible things you did, I loved you. I would have done anything for you if it ended with you asking me out. I wonder just how much you knew that I loved you. My sweet sixteen, when you held me in your arms and we were hugging, that brief moment where we almost kissed, is branded in my mind. I couldn't stop thinking about it if I tried, and trust me, I've tried. How could I forget, you were my first love.

But that was then, and this is now. Now I barely think of you, and I almost never remember the things we did or shared. Now I've moved on to bigger and better. I don't pine over you anymore, I have a real man, someone who will be there for me and who actually loves me back. He doesn't go screaming when he sees my uneven hips or anything else and he sure doesn't make fun of them like you did. I won't deny that we make a strange couple, him being super tall and me not, but none the less we're a couple. We've been dating for the past year, and even though it was a little hectic, it was the best year of my life, better than all of those years of being your friend and hoping you would notice me as more than that. We're planning on getting married and he even gave me a promise ring.

Sometimes it scares me because in some ways he's just like you and I'm afraid that he's going to leave me just like you did. I'm scared that I'll get hurt as badly as you hurt me. It took me years until I finally got over you, and those were horrible years. I don't want that to happen again and that's why now I have issues getting close to people. I just have to keep reminding myself that he's not like you. He's not selfish enough to drop me for no apparent reason. He is the best thing that's ever happened to me.

So this is a goodbye letter. Goodbye to you and everything that you represent. Goodbye to the nights of crying because you didn't love me, goodbye to the emotional roller coaster I was constantly on. I've moved on and you are nothing but a little memory to me now

Love, Me