Evening Star

Evening Star

12-12-07

Stage lights hot and blinding focus their eyes upon me. Thousands of pairs of eyes like beams from oncoming headlights. The applause rises on a swell of sound and I realize there is no mute button. If I had the remote I'd change the channel. If I had a keyboard I'd press escape. But when you're a star, if you are, there is no way off the Christmas tree.

Forty-four other clones stand by me in their formal dress. All in black pressed dresses and suits because we must look the part and claim their hearts. A hush befalls the crowd. Crushed together, a collage of people squeezing in to fit the frame.

The piano rings and the choir sings and I close my eyes and recall you there. A shadowed face I do not know smiling in a way I may never see. And you sing with me alone together in a duet rising above the refrain.

But the music ends and the weight descends and I am but one in the obsidian see of conformity. All I heard of golden harmony is lost amid the accolades. For I have never heard the voice singing counter to mine. And I shall never play the part opposite in your starring role. The forty-five strong body of one smiles blandly. It focuses it's collective gaze upon the instructor and as one hand, turns the next page of music.

"Dance with me in time of three

Steady waves upon the sea.

All I am is what I see

When we chant the melody."