A/N: ALL OF THESE CONVERSATIONS HAVE ACTUALLY HAPPENED!

Case numero uno:

Phone rings.

Speaker: Hello?

Operator Person (OP): Yes, is this the…Smitty…household?

Speaker: (sigh) You mean Smith?

OP: Yes, well, I'm calling on behalf of the TBA association. Are you aware that 7 police offices have been killed this spring in the line of duty? We here at the TBA association are collecting money donations for the families of the police officers. You can make a 10 dollar donation and up.

Speaker: …

OP: Hello?

Speaker: Hold on, I need to ask my cat Mittens. Mittens, what do you think? I always consult my cat Mittens on all of my financial decisions.

OP: We do not mean to be a financial burden on you-

Speaker: Hold on. Mittens hasn't come to a decision yet!

OP: Well, tell Mittens that he can donate just the 10 dollars.

Speaker: Wait, I gotta ask Sweet-Pea now. Hey Sweet Pea, what do you think I should do?

OP: Well then, I'll just put you down for the 10-

Speaker(innocently): Oh, but we're already doing that for the ASPCA.

OP: Yes, but we are the TBA-

Speaker: Yeah? Well what about the endangered animals?! That are going extinct because of Global Warming, because of what the people did! And what about those poor abused animals?! HUH?! What about them?!

OP: Okay, but-

Speaker: Did you know that I LOVE cats? I own nine of them and one of my friends' owns 40, at least! They're just so cute! And cuddly! So much better than those stupid dogs!

OP: … -hangs up-

Speaker: Yes.

A/N: Some names have been changed. There is not, to my knowledge, any association called the TBA. Oh, the 7 is also a made up number. I am not posting the real number. I may be paranoid, but so be it! Anyways, it was me on the phone with those operator peoples. That is so much fun! Review always!

Read Twilight always!

-S