'It's an absolute monstrosity. We need to do something about it! We can't let this go on. It's just an injustice to do so!'
'What do you mean when you say "we", Enid? 'Cause I sure as hell ain't helping you with any of your stupid schemes again.'
'Hey, our last mission was not that bad. Just because we were almost caught. I swear, you have no backbone or something.'
'Whatever, just don't let something like that happen again. Okay?'
'Fine. Now shut up and keep your head down!'
She was going to get them. Get them good. No one would be spared. Enid was on a mission and no one was going to get in her way. Well, maybe George would. He'd only be able to prevent her from committing serious crimes and such though. He'd never, unfortunately, be able to stop her semi-psychotic rant against the sprinkler restriction violators. Yep, that's right. Enid was in a near illegal and very destructive war on people abusing sprinklers. One family in particular.
A few summers ago, the state government had put in place restrictions on the use of sprinklers to help combat the state's water shortage. Many of Enid's neighbours had been obliging, good citizens. Using water wisely, paying attention to their designated sprinkler days. Not the Masons, though. Whenever their gigantic ute/truck/thing wasn't parked on the front lawn, the sprinklers would be on. No wonder their grass was so bloody green. Enid hated it. She hated them. Whilst everyone was doing the right thing, they weren't and they would constantly get away with it, leaving the rest to encounter the repercussions of the actions of the Masons and others like them.
Initially, Enid did what every normal, nosey, precocious fifteen year old would do. She dobbed them in. She called up the local council, gave them the Masons' address and thought that would be the end of it. However, nothing happened. The sprinklers kept going hour upon hour everyday. She called the council again and again. Still nothing happened. She gave up. Then, she declared war.
She managed to drag her unwilling and unsuspecting best friend of nine and a third years, George, into her little battles. He was very unimpressed. After every mission, he would say that was the last. But she always got him back. He never knew why he always ended up back with her, but he suspected that it was because he was the only one who could keep her maniacal tendencies in control. He'd hate to have to visit his best friend in a mental hospital if she was ever caught.
After her declaration of war, she set up a video camera across the street and filmed them everyday for a week. The special 'spy' camera ended up taking a very large chunk out of her rather small bank account, but she thought it was all worth it for the greater good. Enid then posted the footage on nearly every website that hosted videos she could think of and also sent them to the water council, the local council, the state government, the police and even to the office of the local member of parliament. Nothing. Zilch. Nada.
Enid's dislike of the Masons wasn't something recent and stemming from their blatant disregard for the environment. They were snobbish. Rude. Had the most bratty children Enid had ever has the misfortune of meeting. Their eldest son, Tom, was an irresponsible drunk who had recently gotten his driver's license suspended for drink driving. Their house was loud and pretentious. Who the hell needed large iron gates in the middle of suburbia? Then there was their ridiculous truck the most likely belonged to Tom. It was some oversized ute most likely using enough petrol in a week to fuel Enid's mother's sedan for the rest of the year. Everything about the family ticked her off. It was the sprinkler issue that finally set her off.
Enid was getting frustrated. Nothing was deterring the Masons. So far she had poured weed killer all over their lawn. Then she dug up their reticulation and cut out the sprinklers. Of course they were pissed and there were police roaming around for a week, but once the reticulation was fixed the sprinklers were back on again. She was getting frustrated. They were catching on too. Last week she and George had carefully cut up and rolled up the lawn, intending to steal it away. Just as they finished cutting and rolling up the last section, the front lights came on. They ran like they were about to be skinned alive. Probably would have been. They then began parking their cars on the lawn at night. Enid suspected they had probably set up cameras too. George thought this might finally warn her off. She had something else up her sleeve.
'George, we need to move on beyond the sprinklers.'
'If you're suggesting we give up this ridiculous game, then I wholeheartedly agree.'
'Game? GAME? This is not some round of Monopoly! This is about the principle. The morality! Why should they get away with all this when the rest of ua have to put up with the restrictions and pay for their disregard as well? You tell me that!'
'Enid, you can't really go on about morals. Look at everything you've done. You've most likely done more illegal things in the past month than they ever will in their entire lives!'
'George, the end justifies the means. And I so have not done more illegal things than that family. Look at Tom! He's a delinquent!'
'Ugh, fine. Go on about what you were before.'
'Excellent. As I said, we need to proceed to a new level. It's not just about the sprinklers anymore. Seeing as they think they're so clever and have parked their cars and that thing on the lawn, we're going to go for the cars.'
'What. Are you insane? Wait, you already were, but this just takes the cake! What on earth do you plan on doing to the cars exactly?'
'Oh, just a bit of tyre slashing. Maybe a bit of car keying too. It's fucking expensive to get the body of a car repainted you know.' All the while George had just been staring at her with his mouth agape. Oh yeah, that's it. She has lost it. Maybe it wouldn't be so bad if she did go to an institution...
The night had come. Enid was jumping around like a little kid. George couldn't believe what they were about to do. Normally the two would meet on a block of land that was unused and had lots of overgrown grass and bushes. Good hiding place. Tonight, he waited in his room. He'd hoped she'd either leave him out of it or back out. He hoped it was the latter. The chances of her getting into serious trouble were too great. He didn't want her to risk it. No luck though.
There was tapping at his window. He knew it was Enid. He sighed and put on his outfit. The stereotypical cat burglar type made up of black trousers, a black hoodie and a scarf Enid told him to wrap around the lower half of his face. Everything was plain with nothing that might distinguish Enid and George. He then went down to meet the similarly dressed Enid. The only difference was that she had on a dark coloured beanie to hide her ridiculously bright, dyed orange hair. There was no backing out now.
Enid didn't question why George didn't meet her where they normally did. She knew he was apprehensive about this particular 'battle'. She often felt bad about dragging him into something she knew he didn't really want to do. But he never really objected. He was always there with her. She was glad he was. At least she'd have someone to share the blame with if they ever got caught.
It was on. They had carefully snuck up the road to number 31. The Masons'. After what happened last time, they carefully inspected their surroundings. They thought it was doubtful anyone would be awake. It was two in the morning. Enid took out two pocketknives she had stolen for the night from her father and younger brother. She had tested the previously on the hose, but wasn't one hundred per cent sure they would work. She stuck it into one of the tyres of the monstrous truck that belonged to Tom. She had to wriggle it around a little to get it in but then heard the slight hiss of air seeping out. She indicated for George to do the same.
Instead of going for the truck Enid had just slashed, George was at the wheels of a small, white car. That's when he got them. Tom had found them out. Before either could scamper off, he grabbed Enid. Not much trouble since he was three years older than her and she was a puny thing at five foot two.
'George, don't you dare run off or I'll make things worse for you than I will for Enid here.' George didn't argue.
Tom lead them both into his house and got his parents up. The police were there in what seemed to be an instant. Both Enid and George's parents were with them too, discussing how on earth the two could end up doing something like this and apologising profusely to the Masons. By six in the morning, they had ended up in the gaol cells of the local police station. Enid couldn't believe it. She was caught out. She wondered over and over again how he managed to find out. They has inspected their surroundings before hand and there was nothing. No lights on, nothing suspicious. No noise, no movement detected.
Just before both of them were put into the police car, George had told Enid that no matter what, beg for forgiveness. Say that you won't do it again. You sincerely regret it. You were stupid. The thought of saying such things gave Enid a bitter taste in her mouth. She knew she probably do what he said though. George was always the more rational of the two, the more likely to be able to handle a situation like this without making it more unbearably worse. She decided to suck it up.
It was the hardest thing she ever had to do. Let go of her pride and apologise. Grovel. Beg. Seek forgiveness. In the end though, she had been let go. The family decided to not press charges. Both Enid and George, however, were given very stern warnings and told if anything like this happens again, there'd be no second chance. Enid mulled over the Masons not pressing charges for a while. It seemed somewhat suspicious. Why hadn't they? They'd destroyed their property. She thought it was understandable if George was let off since she planned everything, but why was she as well? George told her to forget about it but she couldn't let it go.
The afternoon after the incident, after Enid and her parents had gotten some much need sleep, she woke up to find her phone and computer gone. She was grounded. For a year. During that time, no internet, no phone, no going out and socialising. She was also to go to the Masons and 'help out around the house'. In other words, be their slave. Apparently George had gotten a similar punishment.
Later that evening George and Enid had to go over to the Masons to formally apologise. She hated it. She had the skanky, obnoxious twelve year old sneering at her and going on about how she would make her life hell. Tom gave her an evil smirk. George was quiet the whole time. The two ended up doing the family's dishes before their teatime, and as they were doing so Tom came into the kitchen and was searching the fridge. Her curiosity got the better of her. She had to ask.
'Tom, I need to ask you something.' He gave her a cool look, ignoring her briefly before answering with 'What?'
'Why didn't your family press charges against me? George, I can understand, but why spare me as well?' He gave her a smile. It wasn't a friendly one though. He gave a quick glance to George.
'Well, it's a long story. Basically, George came to us with his concerns about your bizarre plot and asked us to help him get you to scare you into stopping. I knew you'd be out there last night. We were pissed off, but we sort of saw where George was coming from, and we agreed that you were bordering on insane. So yeah. My conspired to scare you. Seems like we've done well.' He then walked out of the kitchen leaving a shocked Enid with George.
She looked at him and asked if it was true. She took his silence as a yes. She was gobsmacked. Her best friend had betrayed her! Sold her out! Thought that she was crazy! She was hurt and angry. Then George spoke up.
'I'm really sorry, Enid. I really, really am! I just didn't know how to get you to stop before you did something even more stupid. I mean, it was stupid enough in the first place! You were attacking them because they used sprinklers, for Christ's sakes!'
'One, I did not attack them. I attacked their property. Big difference. Two, it wasn't just because they were using sprinklers. It was because they were using the irresponsibly. I couldn't handle that. They were making it harder for everyone else that did the right thing. It pissed me off even more when no one did anything about it! I still hate you by the way.'
'Enid, please. I'm sorry. I really, truly am. I know I should have probably gotten you to stop in a less, dramatic way but please forgive me!'
'Fine. I forgive you but I do still hate you.'
'Okay, I'm fine with that. I'm just glad you've gotten over this whole thing though.' This caught her attention. She suddenly got a spark in her eye. She turned to him and said,
'You think that? They still abuse their sprinklers. I saw them on all this afternoon. I still don't like it. I'm still going to make life hell for them. You're still going to help me. The only thing different is that I know am able to get into their house and if you don't help me, you'll be a target too.' She gave him a smile that made him feel sick. She was crazy as ever. She had won. He sighed and returned her smile.
A.N. : Hey, thanks for reading! I'm thinking of writing a few more of these Enid and George stories if anyone likes them. Any reviews would be greatly appreciated! Thanks again.