4"Hey, are you all right?"
Big smile "I'm fine"
Days have gone by since you have sat there by your bedroom window watching him walk away with a cardboard box of his things and a large rucksack on his back. Your mother is clinging on tightly to anything and you feel suffocated, part of you wished he took you with him. Another never wants to see him again.
"Hey are you all right?"
Big smile "I'm fine"
Your mother has slipped into your bedroom and she sits there telling you things that you never wanted to hear about your father. She then moves on to what a bad mother she is, what a bad wife she is and then she turns to you and asks 'do you love me?' you suddenly shriek and cry because how dare she question your love for her.
"Hey are you all right?"
Big smile, not as big as normal "I'm fine"
Your sister has stopped eating, she flinches whenever your father touches her and she snarls at him when she decides to speak to him. She's closed herself up and she has stopped drawing those fantastic pictures and starts to bake chocolate cakes. It's the only time you see her eat. She won't let anyone near her and there's nothing you can do to help her.
"Hey are you all right?"
Smile, seems a little false "I'm fine"
Your brother is now an emotional wreck, he shouts, cries and throws things around, you usually end up rocking him in your arms trying to sooth him. If it isn't you it's your mother and even she looks like she's close to tears.
"Hey are you all right?"
There's no smile and the warmth in the eyes are almost gone "I'm fine"
Exams are coming up, a few more days left of school and then its exam after exam. These are rather important ones, ones that'll decide your future and you're trying to study but the arguments and the screaming are getting louder.
"Hey are you all right?"
No smile, no warmth in eyes, voice flat "I'm fine"
Then your friends are fighting again. They won't speak to each other and they both pressuring you to tell them what the other said about the other. Another is on the warpath and is close to breakdown herself. And your sister is only just starting to eat again.
"Hey are you all right?"
No smile, no warmth in eyes, voice flat, almost quiet "I'm fine"
Suddenly enough is enough. Your friends are watching every move you make, your family is watching every move you make, your teachers are watching every move and you're certain that the neighbours are as well. Suddenly throwing yourself into a different world isn't possible and when your sister suddenly snaps so do you.
You end up in one of your friend's arms, sobbing, screaming and shivering. You're pretty certain that everyone is watching from their classroom windows but god you don't care not anymore, not after everything. The teachers talk to your friend and suddenly you feel yourself being led inside.
You sit there next to your friend drying your eyes out and everything comes out, every little detail, everything your mother had told you and everything you remember. There's half an hour left of school and you pick up your bag say thank you to your friend and the teacher who lent the classroom and you head into class.
The teacher is smiling down at you gently and accepts your apology. You climb into your chair and you pull out your exercise book and start copying the notes on the board.
One of your friends tap your arm.
"Hey are you all right?"
Eyes still damp from crying, nose red from blowing too hard, but a small smile is there, a true one "I'm fine"