There are times in this world where you really start to wonder how boring and unproductive your life is; right now was one of those times. I have flipped through about fifty channels and nothing captured my interest for more than two minutes. The longest show I've watched was on the cooking channel, and that definitely has got to be saying something. My stomach started to growl at the thought.

I turned the television off and rolled onto my back to stare at the blank wall above me. I've thought about painting my room to get rid of the dullness most people think it has, but for some reason, the fact that it was painted a dull white made me want to keep it; I'm starting to reconsider that notion. Maybe if I start putting some life into this room I'd be less bored. I started to criticize my plain room even more before my stomach interrupted me.

"Oh, shut up." I grunted, deciding to satisfy the beast before it became even more annoying. I exited out of my room and started the extremely lazy trek down the wood-paneled floors. The walls were painted a rich beige with portraits of my sister and I smiling together. There was one that I really loved of us finger painting. She had a dab of dark blue paint on her nose that I jokingly put on her. In return she had decided to smack her hand on my face with a mix of different colors. I couldn't help but laugh at our feeble war. I wish time would freeze in place so we could learn to appreciate every moment we spend with someone. But, that's another story. Right now, my stomach was about to have an exciting adventure with all the food I'd stuff it with.

The stairs creaked with my weight as I went down, I could hear the voice of my mom in the other room. I almost forgot she was here until I remembered it was Sunday. A week passed since we had that little talk, and even though I had to stay home on suspension terms, she trusted me enough to babysit myself. I am so glad that she isn't one of those paranoid mothers who think something horrible is going to happen if she ever keeps an eye off her "baby."

"… I don't know what to do, Dan." I paused at the open doorway. I didn't eavesdrop very often since it was only me and mom, but she rarely spoke to dad unless it was about Clarie. I leaned against the side of the wall and waited for her to say something.

"I know she'd hate me if I try to send her away, but I don't think she's going to get any better- I can't keep an eye out on her all the time." What in the name of hell was she talking about? Was she going to send Clarie away from me? What did she mean she can't take care of her? She works in the same place she's in; of course she'd be able to take care of her! I was starting to fume, how can she even think like that? I wanted to barge in and have a say, but I kept my cool and listened.

"Yes, I understand. I think that's a good idea, I'll have to sit and talk to her about it first." I heard her end the call and decided to make my way into the room. She was looking at the phone as if talking to it telepathically but shrugged it off and set the phone back in its holder. Her shoulders slumped a bit after she sighed.

"Talk to who about what?" I asked calmly. She jumped in the air a bit before turning around.

"Oh!" she gasped, "You scared me." I rolled my eyes and stood next to the couch, pinching at the leather. Her nerves started to relax before she spoke, "Well… actually, why don't we have some lunch and I'll tell you after?"

I didn't want to wait until after lunch after what I just heard on the phone, "Why not just say it right now, it's not like I'm going anywhere."

She paused in thought before pointing at the couch I had been picking at, "Have a seat." I did as told. I wondered how she was going to tell me she was sending Clarie away when she knows she means the world to me. Her eyes never met mine but focused on the objects around the room. She was processing what to say, I could almost hear her thoughts.

"I know this might not seem the ideal plan right now, but I need you to hear me out." I nodded for her to continue, "Your father and I have been discussing some things and…" she paused, trying to read my expression. I raised an eyebrow in anticipation. "We think it's best if you went down to live with him." My eyeballs must have blown out of their sockets because she even added more, "Not forever, just temporarily. Things are a little hectic around here and I think – we think that somewhere fresh will keep your mind off things. And plus, your father will be able to look after you more than I can."

I was a little speechless before my mind started to put things together and I could come up with a sensible response, "What…?"

"It's not that I don't want you here, honey." My face must have been killer right now because she still kept on explaining herself, "I want you to start new and learn to live a little, being around me or when you are around me isn't healthy. I barely have any time to see you and talk to you because I'm so stressed out from work." Her face begged me to understand but I couldn't grasp the concept.

Was this what I get for being a disappointment, having my mom try to talk me into moving away from her? I didn't mean to be such a failure, I just can't help it. I can't help that I have to see someone I love slipping with each passing day. I can't help that I try to push away all my emotions so I don't feel the pain, but maybe I'm the one who's so depressing to be around. Maybe, that's why mom is sending me away, so she doesn't have to be dragged down by a disappointment like me.

"Honey… no, no, don't cry," she came towards me and grabs my hand. I flinch away; I couldn't look up at her to see those eyes giving me sympathy.

"You hate me," I murmur, my voice coming out more of a croak, "I'm sorry." I became a little numb in my mind. I even lost the appetite to eat.

"What!" Shock was evident in her voice as she pulled me towards her, I tried to hold it in but the water in my eyes deceived me. "Honey, how can you even think such things? Don't be sorry for anything, you haven't done anything wrong. I love you with all my heart." She kissed the top of my head and continued to hold me.

My breathing was very slow and my voice a mere whisper, "Then why are you sending me away?"

"It's for your own benefit. Being here isn't the right place for you, I want you to succeed and be proud of who you are, but you can't do that here, not right now, anyway." She cradled me back and forth, rubbing my arm in a circular motion. "There are things we must do in life in order to achieve happiness, this is just one of those things."

"But what if I'm happier here?" my voice gets a little bit louder, "Clarissa won't get to see me as much if I'm all the way in freaking Hughsville!"

"It's only a three hour drive, you can come down over the weekends," she reasoned, pulling up a pillow next to her onto her lap for me to rest my head on. She combed her fingers through my slightly wavy dark brown hair and waited for me to respond.

"What about you?" I asked, "I don't want to leave you here." I turned my head so I could look up into her intense green eyes. She always told me that you could read a person by concentrating on them hard enough. I always thought it was a silly joke until a year or so ago.

"I've been left once with two beautiful daughters to take care of, I'm sure I can handle it," she smiled. I gave a disapproving glance, but she chuckled before I could say anything. "Okay, so maybe not the best reference, but I'm a big girl; I can take care of myself."

Mom continued to explain the living with situation with dad. I was glad to know I wasn't the reason she was pushing me away but it still kind of felt that way. I started to think that maybe this would be better on her; she wouldn't have to worry about me. The more she talked about it the more reasonable it sounded- for her sake. I knew for sure that I wasn't stable, but only being able to see Clarissa on the weekends still got to me. Apparently, Mom and Dad had been talking about this since the last few calls from the school. They had it all planned out, which still has me hooked on her wanting me away bit.

I would have to pack my bags tonight because Dad started work around early evening and if he left early enough he'd make it back just in time. Leaving so soon was a shocker, but the week and a half suspension didn't leave me to do much at home anyway. It sort of ticks me to know Sissy might spread some stupid rumor about me being too scared to show my face in school, but whatever. Mom is actually right about starting some place new. Maybe it'd give me some insight to deal with my problems better. I've always tried to have a positive outlook on life, but lately it's been so hard. I still wish that I didn't have to be away from Clarie. I'm still a hell of a lot repelled to move, but I'm not the type of person that always looks out for what's best for me. In this case, I'm doing what's best for Mom and I'll just have to deal with that.

Author's Note: Howdy, all. (: Well, it's 2:00am, and I have written this out of pure whim. I know I don't have an exact schedule for when I write and stuff, but it's not like there's been much people reading this story anyway. I'll still try to get a plan going after I stop procrastinating. Please tell me what you think and even drop some criticism to spice up my day. Also, how do I do the page breaks on here? I think I'm mentally incapable of reading stuff and figuring it out, but it'd be nice if someone can help me out on that tidbit. Thanks , for reading!