TWO

Jogger sighed deeply. He was in his now declared human village by the coast and currently bored off his socks. He had always liked it really. The different beings and creatures that used to come and mingle with the humans. It just didn't seem right not having a dwarf to chat with or some renegade pixies to swat away. Just a bunch of dumb humans.

"Good morning jogger!" a cheerful lady waved to him as she walked by.

Jogger cringed, that was the worst part..everyone was so..so...happy about it!

"That's it!" He said, standing up "I can't take all this peace and quiet! So he decided to go see the druids and complain to them about how lame his life was.

Meanwhile, desolation was..well...desolate.

In fact no one seemed to have bothered with it since the great fire and it was still covered in ash.

"Bloody druids" Ekel muttered to himself, kicking up some soot while he walked along the soggy shoreline. "Bloody enoch. This is all his fault." Then again to him it seemed that everything that went wrong in his life was the fault of Enoch.

On the other side of the island (Which was not very far away) Enoch was thinking mostly the same thing, though just a little more cunning, he was mainly focusing on how he was going to survive. "I could grow pineapples" He mused "They're tropical, they like acidic soil, they're easy." This sounded like a good plan to him, who doesn't like pineapple? "I could grow lemons" Was another thought that crossed his mind "And build the worlds largest lemonade stand. Everyone likes lemonade-" His trail of thoughts ended as a ball of soot hit him in the face.

"THIS IS ALL YOUR FAULT!" Ekel yelled for the fifth time that day.

The island was approximately ten yards long and fifteen yards wide and there weren't exactly any lanscape barriers between them...just soot.

"Bloody YOUR fault your fault!"

"Shut it Ekel."

"I WANT OFF!"

"I said-"

"GET ME OFF THIS ISLAND!"

Great, Enoch thought, stuck on a very small island with a claustrophobic, panicky when trapped wizard who happened to hate him very much. Could this get much worse? "Ekel" He started again.

Ekel brightened up, hoping for an idea on how to escape.

"I've decided" Enoch continued.

"Yes?!"

"I'm going to grow pineapples."

Ekel's face fell...then it got angry "Well...that's...good." He said, his voice leaked insanity "...Good for you, pineapples you say? Well that should prove very hard to beat. Do you know what I've decided to do?"
Enoch waited patiently.

"I'VE DECIDED I'M GOING TO KILL YOU!" And then he started to strangle Enoch.

"Gah! Stop!" Enoch choked, though it sounded a little more like "GRRuooook!" The way he said it. But he signaled that he had a plan so Ekel let go. "Okay" Enoch gasped, rubbing his throat "Let's compact the soot into a raft, sail back to shore and go to the wizards and demand that we get an equal share of land."

"Compact?" Ekel gave him an odd look.

"Yes."

"How?"

Enoch grabbed Ekel's hand and waved it limply in front of his face "We're wizards remember?!" He said "we can do just about anything we want!"

"Oh...right."

When Jogger got to the great valley he saw that a lot had happened since the last time he had been there. There was a great construction going on in the center of it.

When Balthazar saw him the old man literally squealed in delight "Oh Karl!" He said gleefully "It's great to see you! Isn't this marvelous?! Is it not the greatest thing you have ever laid eyes on?!"

"First of all" Jogger pointed out "My name is Jogger, and secondly...uhh..." He looked at the great structure that was being built up around them "What exactly IS it?"
"Some mysteries must be revealed in due time." Balthazar said mysteriously. Then he chuckled.

Jogger began to think...what kind of building would make a druid so darn happy? Then he scowled. "You didn't."

"Whether I did or did not is not of present concern!" Balthazar replied, jittery with excitement.

"How could you?! It's terrible!" Jogger said "I mean, you've got this entire great valley..and you decide to turn it into this?!"

The druid could not have looked more content.

"Honestly Balthazar. A library?"

And that was in fact what it was.

"No Karl." the druid's eyes sparkled "The worlds largest library."

"But Balthazar!" Jogger argued, even forgetting to correct him on the name. "We're in the middle of a hunger crisis, you could use this valley to grow...Pineapples!"

"..Pineapples?" Asked Balthazar.

"...Well it's just a thought." Jogger looked at his feet "Everyone loves pineapple."

"That they do" Balthazar agreed "But I want you to put that thought out of your head."

"But why?!"

"Hmph." Balthazar folded his arms. "Pineapples he says. Comes here and says pineapples. Well we certainly could have used that the other week during planning when we were trying to figure out what to do with this whole configuration. There's just no way I can change it now."

"Why not?!" Karl was starting to wonder how it was that the world had suddenly gotten to be so much more confusing.

"Well er...It would cost a lot."

"Is that all?" Jogger said "For my grandfather left me a great inheritance that would be more than enough to-"

"Of course." Balthazar sighed "But that's not all! There's umm...Paperwork involved...a lot of paperwork." He looked into Jogger's eyes "You don't want to fill out all those forms do you?"

Jogger looked at him and nodded.

"Uhh...really?"

"Sure! Anything to help. Where is all the paperwork?"

"Ummmm..." Balthazar thought quickly and pointed to a shed a few yards away. "In there, it might take a little while to find them, probably buried beneath all those jars of fairies, but they're there alright!"

"Great! I'll just be a moment, meanwhile you can tell everyone to stop building" and with that he jogged off to go fill out the paperwork.

Shortly afterward another druid approached Balthazar "What was that all about?" He asked, suspiciously peering over his monocle.

"Oh..that?" Balthazar said "Well that was just Jogger the ranger. He had this great suggestion that we triple our production-which means you're going to have to hire some more foreign halflings. Now excuse me while I go and take care of something quick." And with that Balthazar went off in the same direction he had sent Jogger.

"Hmm..." Jogger was squinting his eyes in the dark of the cellar, he couldn't see much of anything down here besides a few dried up turnips. "If I were a stack of boring paperwork..." He said "Where would I be?" He kept searching until he found an old trunk. "Aha!" He said "That crafty old druid must have put them in here to keep them safe after all. I knew that Good old Balthazar wouldn't leave anything to chance-" And just like that something hard hit him over the head and Jogger found himself falling into the trunk, which was actually empty except now for him.

"AHH! Let me out!" Jogger pounded his fist on the lid of the chest, but it had already been latched shut. Of all the misfortune, to be attacked in the dark by a mysterious foe-but who would do such a thing? Who would have anything to gain from preventing him from filling out some papers.

"I'm sorry Jogger."

No...it couldn't be, but that voice belonged to-

"But I can't have people...interfering...with the library."

"Balthazar!" Jogger said accusingly "I should've known! This whole thing is a scam isn't it!?"

"Sorry Jogger. The library must live. "

And from that point on all Jogger really caught on to was that he was being dragged along until he heard some waves...and then he was falling...and then he hit the water and knew that he was floating, and also probably done for.