What can you do when your only hope of escape is a little tiny blacked out window on the other side of the basement?

What do you do when you can't remember the last time you saw sunlight?

You do what I do.

I sit trying to get the shackle off of my left arm. Trying to maybe manage to make it further then the middle of this empty dreary room.

To the bed placed just out of my reach to taunt me.

Wishing I had enough endurance to break my thumb so I could pull my arm out of the shackle.

I do quadratic equations in my head and recite poems I learned in freshman year, just to keep my mind going. But always in my head. I never speak, she might hear me.

I regret that I never appreciated my friends until I was gone.

I regret I never told my sister how much I love her.

I regret that I never made it to sophomore year.

I wonder what my dad would do if he knew that the monstrosity he married was the one who took me.

I wonder if he knows she's cheating on him.

I pray every day that he finds out that I'm in her basement of the house he doesn't know she even has.

I bet she bought it with the money she told him I stole.

I think she might be coming. The floor boards are creaking over my head.

I wonder what month it is now.

I wonder if my sister graduated high school yet. She was the smart one. She left with mom.

What could have been if I didn't look Latina? Maybe she would have never noticed. Of course my dad had to marry a racist white woman.

In case you're wondering, he is white, but my mom is Latina. And me?

I am double.

Bi-racial.

Café con leche.

Mixed.

Whatever you want to call me.

Just don't call me trash.

I don't think she ever liked me.

Oh, the door is opening up.

Ah, Dios. I move into a ball on the floor and try to act like I'm asleep.

Breathe deeply.

Whatever you do, don't move, I tell myself.

She comes down the stairs, but after every step there is a 'thud' following. It sound like she is dragging something.

This is not the usual way she walks. She isn't clicking with each step, so she's not wearing heels, so she isn't coming home from work.

She always stops here before she goes home. That's why I get a basic idea of time of day. She comes here right after work, at about 6. But I think she changes it every once in a while to confuse me.

She's down the stairs now, and I definitely hear her dragging something.

Something rustles, then I hear her move the other shackle, and I brace myself for her to move me so she can clip it on.

She always clips my other wrist before she hurts me.

But it clicks without her ever touching me.

What in the world?

She heads back up the stairs, and returns a moment later with what I assume to be a plate of some sort of food, and maybe, if I'm lucky, a water bottle too.

She yanks on my chain, and I let my arm come out from underneath me.

She is checking to make sure I haven't gotten it off yet. Like I would still be laying here if I could.

Then she goes back upstairs and locks the accursed basement door.

I wait for a minute just to make sure she doesn't come back down. It's a rare day that she doesn't hurt me.

But I've learned to keep quiet. The first few times she would come down, she would kick me and kick me, sometimes punch me, and once, I think she burned me.

Obviously, at first I screamed, but she only did it harder.

I've learned that if I don't move, don't even breathe, it'll be over soon and she will go upstairs. Only then will I cry.

I never let her see me cry.

Because she is the weak one. She is the one who needs to hit me to feel better. She is the one who had to steal me so my father will cry on her shoulder. She is the one who is so ignorant to degrade everyone who isn't white. She is the one that hates to look at me because my skin isn't like cream. She hates me because I am café con leche.

And becase I simply won't give her the pleasure of knowing she has broken me.

She may see me as the weaker person because my skin is dark and my hair is black and I sound a little different because of my mother's accent, but I will prove that I am not.

She will never see me cry.

I think it is safe to move now. Slowly, as not to scrape myself on the concrete, I pushed myself up, and turned around.

First, I noticed the food, it looks like rice and some sort of green vegetable, and not one, but two water bottles. Then…

"Ah mi Dios!" I whispered to myself.

They were the first words I had said in at least a month.

I felt a single lone tear streak down my face before I had a chance to wipe my eyes.

There, only a few feet away lay my sister Catalina, spread out on the floor, her face dirty and her hair covering most of her face. Although her arm was shackled to a ring in the wall just like mine, both her hands and both of her feet were tied together.

"Ah, Dios, Dios, Dios." I whispered to myself as I moved closer to Catalina and gently began unknotting the rough rope that bound her.

There's no way I could let her wake up like this.

You see, as with most high schools, there is a hierarchy. Seniors, then Juniors, then Sophomores, then Freshies.

As luck would have it, Catalina managed to be a senior at the same time as I'm a freshie.

(I "disappeared" in April, so I never finished freshie year.)

And let me tell you, the seniors at our high school are pure evil. Needless to say, Catalina takes almost every opportunity she could get to get back at me for embarrassing her when I was little.

But she is my sister, and I know she is there for me. Even though I know she expects a lot out of me, I get something out of living up to her expectations.

And I don't think it would sit well if I just left her.

Even though I'm pissed they didn't find me.

Slowly, I managed to free her hands, then the other, grimacing as I saw the bloody rings encircling her wrists from the bindings.

I put the rope in my pocket, and moved on to undo her ankles. After a minute or so I had finally freed her and right on time, she started to move around.

I scooted back up towards her head, and took her hand in mine.

"Talina?" I whispered.

She slowly opened her eyes, and focused on me.

"Sarita…" She said, her voice rough and dry.

"Shhh." I shushed her and grabbed a water bottle and cracked it open and held it to her lips.

She took a huge drink, downing almost half of the bottle before I pulled it away.

Catalina pulled herself up into a sitting position and leaned up against the wall.

"I missed you." She breathed, more to herself I figured, than to me.

"Missed you too." I paused, thinking of anything I might need to ask before she forgot.

"Talina?"

"Yeah?"

"What's today's date?" I said, savoring the feel of the words as they came out of my mouth.

"It's June 1st."

I nodded in response, then let my mind into its daily routine.

I started reciting The Raven.

I let my lips move, but said nothing.

Once upon a midnight dreary, While I pondered weak and weary, over many a quaint and curious volume of forgotten lore…

"What are you doing?" Catalina poked me.

"Reciting. Do you mind?"

"Yes. Why?"

"So that I don't go crazy."

"Why would you go crazy?" Sometimes I just had this desire to murder my sister. This is one of those times.

"When was the last time you saw the sun, Catalina?" I growled my voice sharp.

"Yesterday."

"Ask me that question." I shot at her.

She sighed. "When was the last time you saw the sun, Sarita."

"The beginning of April."

"Okay, Okay, I get your point."

I figured she saw the value in my logic, as her lips began moving. I think it was something from Emily Dickinson.

I kept on going with Poe.

After a while, I looked over at the darkened window and tried to make out how dark outside it was.

Looks to be just about sunset.

Ah, Dios. She is way overdue.

I think I will call her by her name to keep from confusing things. Her name is Lily.

What a juxtaposition to have such a horrid person to be named after a flower.

Well, anyway, I figure she's overdue to come down. Not that I am looking forward to it but still.

Right on time I hear the front door of the house slam again...Lily is back.

I've got about ten minutes.

Mierda.

"Talina?" I whisper to my sister, breaking her out of her recitation.

"Yeah."

"You're going to hate me in about 5 seconds." She looked at me, and slowly her eyes narrowed.

"What do you mean, Sarita." Her voice was tight.

"Well...I kind of have to...well..." I trailed off. I really don't want to finish what I am about to say.

"Spit it out Sarita."

"Tie you back up." I spat out, avoiding my sisters face.

"QUÉ?"

"Well, when Lily brough you down, you were umm, asleep. And tied up. I figured you wouldn't exactly be happy with me if I let you wake up like that."

"Continue." Her voice hurt. It was not nice. It cut at me.

"So, I need to tie you back up."

"Yeah, you want to explain that again?" Sometimes, Catalina just isn't very good at making connections.

"She thinks I'm asleep."

"Why."

I don't feel like explaining the complexity of my situation to you right now!

Dios. Ay Dios me ayuda.

"Because, Catalina. Now, I can do this with your help, or I swear I'll do it regardless. I'm a little more experienced it n this area than you."

"Fine. But you better be gentle. And I want a serious explanation later."

"Fino por mí." Catalina held out her hands, and saw the marks around them for the first time."

Her mouth dropped open.

"Sa...Sa...Sa..."

"Just trust me Catalina. I won't hurt you."

She can be really untrusting sometimes.

Talina slowly held her hands out, and I took them in mine.

Her feet are moving above our heads.

Ay, I'm running out of time.

I wind the rope around her wrists, stopping tightening when I hear the little hiss come from between her teeth.

Before she got a change to say anything I tell her to lay down, and I position her as she was when I rolled over and first saw her.

Then I moved down to her feet and quicly retied them, and pulled her jeans back down over the rope.

"Stay still. Look asleep." I ordered her, before moving back to my former position.

Just as I closed my eyes, Lily opened up the door.

Instantly my breathing rate started to go up, and I have to fight to pull it back down.

She was in heels again.

Click, click, click, all the way down the stairs and into the middle of the room, where the clicks stopped.

Why did she stop?

Breathe, Sarita, breathe.

She takes another step towards me.

Brace.

I hear the faint rustling of her pants shifting, and I take it that her leg was moving, which means she is coming at me.

Ay meirda.

I registered the impact before the wave of pain hit me.

I remember thinking that it was going to leave a bruise in a few hours.

I didn't move.

Talina is shifting next to me.

Ay Dios. This is not going to be pleasant.

Please don't move Catalina. If you love me, don't move. Please.

The rustling started again, and almost instantly I felt an impact on my side, and I let my body wiggle with the force.

I can't breathe.

Ay Dios, I can't breathe. I sturggle to take a breath as I brace for the next blow.

I can hear Talina moving next to me.

Please, don't move.

"Get off of her!" Catalina yells, as a final blow connects to my head and I feel my self drift into unconsciousness as I hear Lily cursing at Talina and the last thing I heard what a faint cry from my sister before all was black.