I knew he was gone-
The look on everyone's face when I asked how he was doing.
But I couldn't believe it-
Because there he was- standing in front of me, smiling the same warm smile as always.
I hurtled myself towards him and his warm embrace, and fell right through him.
I then knew that he was no longer.
But I could still feel the warmth of his arms, the taste of his kiss.
Without looking back, I ran towards the sea, blinded by tears.
Rage also- those that took him would pay dearly.
I came to a short cliff- it invited me off the edge, into the stormy grey sea.
I turned around, seeing nobody.
Not him, not my friends, nobody.
Had they too given up? Found their own cliffs?
My eyes closed- my hands gripped the hem of my skirt.
I ran, and jumped-
The air whooshed through me like a ghost; invaded my lungs.
"Goodbye…" he whispered to me, and let go.
And I woke up, screaming as I plunged through the freezing ocean, the spray clinging to my face, my hair.
Life without him is impossible.
But life remembering him…
It shall be livable.