My Definition of Love
A sequel to my oneshot 'Guess What I Found'

Summary: 'Dear Elise, I learnt that love is a four letter word that I'd have to figure out myself, and without a dictionary'

Please note: Guess What I Found does not need to be read first in order to understand this :)

Oh, and if you're wondering, Ben and Elise are both 24 in this.

Disclaimer: The dictionary entry is made up by me with help from Encarta Dictionary.

Dear Elise – my other half, my lover and my best friend,

Love – what is it?

It was back in second grade when I learnt that love is a four letter word. You were in my class that year, but you probably don't remember.

It was a Tuesday which meant it was 'Writing Day' where we had to recount what we did on our weekend in our journals. Now, that Tuesday was in the fifth week of winter. Snow had just begun to fall, and I was having snowball fights with my dad.

'It were very cold outside. Dad told me to wear a pear of loves', I wrote. Ms Honey read over my shoulder and smiled.

"Ben, you've only spelt three words wrong!" she said as she circled 'were', 'pear' and 'loves' in red pen. "You're really improving on your spelling!"

I read over the sentence, "I know 'were' and 'pear' are wrong, but what's wrong with 'loves'?"

She smiled again. "You've just got the wrong word. You're trying to describe the item keeping your hand warm right? That's called a 'glove', not a 'love'. You see the difference? Glove is a five letter word and love is a four letter word."

I was still confused though. "But what does love mean?"

She shook her head. "That's something I can't tell you. You can look it up in the dictionary but it won't give you the right answer. The definition of love is something you have to figure out on your own. Not everyone figures it out, but most people do."

Now Ms Honey had made me worried. "What if I can't figure it out?"

Her eyes flickered around the classroom. "You'll figure it out Ben. I know you'll figure it out."

So that Tuesday in second grade, I learnt that love is a four letter word that I'd have to figure out myself, and without a dictionary. To my seven year old self, it sure sounded easy, but I soon discovered that it wasn't.

At the young age of seven, I started searching and searching for the definition of love, but at seven, I never found it.

I didn't find it when I was eight either. The only thing I figured out that year was that whatever I was trying to find was a lot harder than looking for worms.

When I was nine, I almost lost hope and went to drastic measures to ask my dad.

"Love eh?" he said as he scratched his head. "Uh…why don't you try the dictionary for that one?"

I almost did try the dictionary that year, but I remembered that the dictionary wouldn't give me the right answer.

The next year however, when I reached double digits, I decided that Ms Honey had been lying and I checked the dictionary anyway.

Love [luv]

1. To like someone very much
2. To feel desire for somebody
3. To feel affection for somebody

noun (plural loves)

1. Attraction and desire
2. Strong affection
3. Romantic affair
4. Strong liking

I remember my ten year old self had scratched his head and thought 'to feel desire and affection for somebody? Ew.'

The next two years, I gave up trying to search for the definition of love. For an eleven/twelve year old, maybe it was just too hard.

Thirteen was a big turning point. I guess it was the year I hit puberty and discovered hormones. Unfortunately, with hormones came the ridiculous crushes. I remember being too scared to ask girls out and I also remember your crazy obsession with Zac Efron. Suddenly, attraction and desire didn't seem 'ew' anymore, it was something I that was intrigued by.

The next year when I turned fourteen, I thought, 'Are crushes young love?' By then, I'd noticed that crushes never lasted long and they were easy to get over.

When I was fifteen, I thought I had found real love but in the end, I broke it off because I realised that I only liked her instead of love her. Don't get me wrong, Annabel was a great girlfriend but we both realised we were better off as friends because all the strong affection and strong liking were all starting to wear off.

Finally, at sixteen, I found the definition of love. That was the year we got together after I found your journal.

It's been 8 years since we got together that summer, and after asking a lot of people what the definition of love is, I figured out that everyone has their own definition.

Some say, "Love is beautiful".

Others say, "Love is never having to say sorry".

My mum says, "Love is the best feeling in the world".

My little brother says, "Love is a pain in the ass".

And I've figured out that they're all right, but I have found my own definition as well.

Love is the way my heart beats, every time you walk through the front door.

Love is the reason why I still get butterflies, even though I've known you for so long.

Love is what keeps me going, no matter what it may be.

Love is what makes me smile, because it's also what makes me happy.

Love is why I still blush beetroot red, because no matter what you'll still have an effect on me.

Love is the reason why I wake up every morning, because I wake up to see you.

Love is what I feel for you, something so much more than a teenage crush.

But most important of all, love is you and me. Together we share a special bond, a bond that we'll never share with anyone else.

So when you turn around, don't be surprised to see me standing on one knee with a black box in my hand.

I love you Elise, will you marry me?



Author's note: Woot! Did you enjoy that? Ben is such a sweet guy. :) I hope you enjoyed it and I look forward to hearing your thoughts on it so feel free to review.

If you enjoyed this, check out Guess What I Found – the beginning of Ben & Elise's story.