Apology of a Sorted Variety

Read the ingredients before ingesting,

Because it may contain peanuts or some

Other thing that causes you to break

Out in hives and your tongue to swell.

This bag is not a toy

Keep out of reach of children.

Consult your doctor before taking

As this could result in heart failure,

Stroke and in rare cases, death.

New Flavor!

Headache, runny nose, watery eyes,

Cough. Fixes it all!

May cause headache, runny nose, watery eyes,

Or cough.

Keep out of reach of children.

Do not take more than eight capsules a day.

Original Flavor!

Cherry! Grape! Bubblegum! Banana!

Some assembly required.

Ages 3 and up. Fun for the whole family!

Fat free! Sugar free!

No frills! No gimmicks!

Heartburn, nausea, indigestion, upset stomach,

Diarrhea.

Coats all the way down.

Do not pay for nine months!

Please try a free sample!

Please take a number.

Where are the English instructions?

Why do we only have the Japanese instructions?

Where's the last screw?

Why's there an extra piece?

WARNING: May increase thoughts of suicide in

Children and teens.

Do not mix with alcohol.

Take twice a day with meals.

50 – 75% off today only!

Copyright. TM.

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Keep away from children!

Keep away from heat!

A great source of vitamin C!

A great source of calcium!

Childproof lid. Press down and turn with palm.

Do not get in eyes.

Do not swallow.

This product is corrosive.

Removes scum and lime-scale!

Because you're worth it.

Apply directly to the forehead.

Crunchy coating with a chewy center!

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New! APOLOGY!

Comes in two flavors! Heartfelt and

Total Bullshit!

Buy two, get one free!

Save 25% on the Variety Pack!

Download successful!

You may now kiss the bride!

Satisfaction guaranteed!

One-year warranty EXPIRED.

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Going once, going twice…

SOLD!

To the lady begging on her knees!

Then he says to me, "I'll take her!"

And I go, "That's not an apology, that's my wife!"

APOLOGY has been accepted!

Please wait for confirmation letter.

You should receive one within sixty seconds.

Sealed with a kiss.