27Hello everyone, this is the last and finale chapter to Ashley and Seth's story...there is a possibility of a sequel, but I'm not making any promises as of now. Depends what the feed back is from chapter. :) so it depends on you guys. Thank you to all the people who sent me reviews, I ask that you send me more on this, I want to know what you honestly think with it.
And don't let the chapter name full you ;)
Thank you all so very much.
- K.V.
It was dark when Seth dropped me off at Sarah's, he said he couldn't stay, he had to go talk to Winter, I nodded numbly trying my best smile as he kissed me briefly, then left the car and just took off down the street. I knew it wouldn't be long before he had changed and was on the outskirts of town. I was secretly thankful; I couldn't keep up Miss Smiley anymore.
I opened the door and practically ran to Sarah's room, I opened her bedroom door to find her asleep on the floor, she had a note on her bed,
Hey Ashley, you get the bed tonight, you seem warn out, so here's to a good night sleep, cheers.
-Sarah.
I glanced at the bed, then down at Sarah, I sighed, grabbed two pillows and a blanket off the bed and curled up on the floor next to her. She rustled a bit then sat up.
"Mmmm...Ashley?" She said sleepily. I smiled.
"Yeah, who else is this amazing at being a sneaky ninja?" I said jokingly, she groggily punched me in the arm and slumped back down on the floor, then flipped to her back as I laid down next to her.
"What's wrong?" She asked.
"What makes you think there is something wrong?" I questioned, but I felt my stomach knot, she knew me to well, she wasn't going to drop this.
She propped herself up on her elbows, but I swung my arm around and knocked them our from under her.
"Oof! Ashley you jerk!" She said, next thing I knew I saw a great massive whiteness, and then a pillow crashing down on my head, I yelped out and quickly snatched a pillow to defend myself.
After a few minutes it turned out to a full pledge pillow war, one pillow was lost in battle, its innards floating around us like un melting snow. We laughed and giggled like we did when we were little till we both collapsed from fatigue, for Sarah I knew that was inexistence, she had a immeasurable amount of energy, but she faked it for my sake. After we could both breath again, we sat up and began picking feathers out of our hair.
"So...whats up Ninja?" She asked half smiling. I stuck my tongue out at her only to receive a mouth full of feathers, I spat them out and glared up at her, but I suddenly didn't feel like giving her the major screaming tickle she deserved. I sighed and looked up at her ceiling plastered with posters of boy bands she had liked since she was thirteen. I smiled remembering her room blaring with the crappie music every time I came over to visit. We were so different...but so much alike at the same time. I glanced back down at her realizing...that in a couple days, I might never see her again. I suddenly felt sick. Sarah had been there my whole life, through my mom leavening, my dads abusiveness, the few attempts I had at running away, everything with school I put up with from both my parents, this whole thing with Seth, my mom coming back...she had been there unwavering at all of it, and I was soon to love her forever. I gulped, I could feel the tears crashing on me, this seemed to be a new fad lately, me crying.
"Ashley...what's wrong? Are you crying? You don't cry..." Sarah's voice entered my thoughts seeming very alarmed. I placed my fingers on the upper bridge of my nose, pinched it and looked down. I slammed my eyes shut trying to get them to stop, but they wouldn't.
I could feel them spilling down my face, despite my attempts to stop them they went from there to my shirt, to the floor, and on the blanket that some how managed to wrap around my legs.
I felt Sarah's arms hesitantly wrap around me, I knew she wasn't use to seeing me like this, SHE was the crying one, not me. I was the iron women in the face of pain.
I wasn't really use to it either.
"Ashley...you know you can tell me ANYTHING right?" She said. A short harsh laugh broke out of me before I sniffed and pulled away looking at her. For a minute the insane idea of telling her crossed my mind.
...But was it so insane of a thought?
"Anything?" I asked honestly looking for a answer. She paused then nodded. I smiled shortly. "Sarah...we are going to need ice cream, lots, and lots, of ice cream."
"So, Zach is like, insane, and Autumn wants to see me cut up into many tiny little pieces." I finished a hour and a half later. I licked my spoon and put it down in my empty container of moose tracks ice cream, my favorite. I glanced over at Sarah who was sitting next to me, leaning up against one of her bed room walls, she had her hands on the floor next to her, her legs out in a V in front of her, and her rocky road ice cream spoon hanging out of her mouth. She was looking at the wall in front of her. She didn't move for a minute, then reached up, grabbed the spoon from her mouth, and glanced down at her also empty container.
"...We need more ice cream." She said. I raised a eye brow.
"That's it?" I asked. I was worried she was humoring me and was at any moment gonna scream for her neighbors to call a ambulance to come whisk me away.
"No, AFTER we get more ice cream I wanna hear more about this bitch Autumn." She said pushing herself up. I felt my mouth hanging open, I quickly shut it and jumped up to follow her leaving the room. The house was ours tonight, I was thankful for it.
"So...you believe me? You don't think I'm insane...I mean I just told you Seth is a werewolf, I'm going to be turned into one, and that his pack leader hates me." I said in disbelief. I was almost trying to prod her for the reaction I expected.
She sighed and paused half way down the stairs, then glanced back at me.
"Ashley, I've known you practically my whole life...you have never, ever, not for a joke or anything else, lied to me...why would you honestly start now, and with this?" She said. We stared at each other for a minute.
"Sarah...I'm scared" I said, almost a whisper. She paused, put down her ice cream container on one of the steps, and held out her arms, I stumbled down the three steps to her and fell into her. We sat on the steps for I don't know how long, I just sniffed into her shirt. I was vaguely aware of her hand going over my hair and whispering reassuring things to me. I just clung to her, she was something stable, real, so many things have been pulled out from under me, I had been falling for so long, and I had finely hit the bottom. It was painful. I felt so many emotions flood my head, all negative, fear, doubt, worry, sadness, numbness...but I knew I had to do it to keep Seth. And I would do anything to keep him.
After a while I sniffed enough, and Sarah and I made out way to her kitchen where she retrieved her last half gallon of cookie dough. We then retreated back to her room.
"Hey Sarah?" I said.
"Hm?" She mumbled looking at her massive CD collection.
"Can we...can we listen to one of those crappie boy bands you use to like when you were a kid?" I asked. I saw her glance over her shoulder for a minute, then she reached towards the bottom of a stack, pause to look at the cover, smiled, then put it in her CD player. In a few seconds the whole room was filled with pre pubescent voices with annoyingly in sink voices and mooshy lyrics. I smiled as she sat down next to me and we both pocked around at the ice cream in front of us.
"God...I haven't listened to them in forever..." She said after the next song, which use to be a huge hit on the radio, kicked in.
"I know" I said laughing at the horrible lyrics.
"Wanna tell me more?" She asked. I paused, I realized I did, I hadn't talked to anyone about any of this since it happened. I took a deep breath, and jumped back into more details, for the rest of the night she listened, nodded, laughed, smiled, spilled a few short tears, and shouted out in anger. By the time the sun just began to rise, we were both passed out on her floor, a almost empty half gallon of ice cream melting not far away.
"Ashley...Ashley wake up."
I groaned and rolled on my stomach to avoid contact.
"Ashley" Came another voice. "Its Seth, you gotta wake up."
I lifted my head and forced my eyes to stay open even though it stung. Seth was kneeling on the ground next to me, he looked a bit angry. Sarah smiled sheepishly behind me.
"Urm...he knows I know." She said looking down at her feet. I looked at Seth who scowled at me disapprovingly.
"Sorry..." I said feeling my face turn pink. He sighed and moved some hair out of my face.
"I guessed it would happen, I'm surprised you held up this long...do you wanna guess how I found out she knew?" He asked half smiling and glancing over his shoulder. Sarah's face turned red and she looked down again. I nodded wondering if I actually did or not.
"She asked me...if I've ever had fleas." He said. I paused for a minute, then burst into uncontrollable laughter. I rolled on my back, my knees coming to my chest, laughing so hard I couldn't even breathe. I could hear Sarah start to giggle behind Seth.
"Its not that funny ya know" He said. I looked at him, he was smiling though, he seemed to be enjoying how much I was laughing, I still couldn't stop.
Two minutes later I forced myself to calm down, I pushed myself up still smiling, that was till I realized why Seth was there. I quickly went from bubbly and happy, to nauseas and worried. He and Sarah both saw it. Sarah looked like she was going to start crying again, Seth frowned. I tried to smile and stand up. I glanced back at Seth.
"Um...what should I wear?" I asked. He looked down at the ground.
"Baggy cloths...baggiest you have. And I wouldn't make it anything you like too much...and bring a extra outfit."
I nodded trying not to think of the ice cream that suddenly wanted to come back up. I opened a dresser drawer Sarah put all my things in, I grabbed a baggy T-shirt that use to be my dads...might as well get rid of all the bad memories...I also grabbed a pair of loose pajama shorts that I had had for the last couple years, I hated them, pink with little dogs on them. After that I found my back pack and blindly through a extra outfit in it.
I didn't look at Seth or Sarah as I turned to walk to the bathroom across the hall to change.
I shut the door behind me and then slid down it.
My knees came up to my chest and I folded my arms on top of them, laying my head down. My stomach flipped, jumped, and squirmed uncomfortably.
"I can do this..." I told myself. I reminded myself of how Seth looked when he changed, how free he seemed, how beautiful he was...I wanted that. I was just scared of it. I thought about it though, I was probably afraid of my first step too...and I know I was terrified the first time I rode my bike...but then again, I wasn't painfully changing into a animal in those experiences either.
I stood up, changed, and glanced in the mirror, the T-shirt was so long you couldn't even see the pink shorts underneath. Good. Only my pale legs were visible. Bad. Oh well. I considered shaving, then shortly laughed thinking how pointless that would be, technically they would be harry again in a few hours anyway.
I mentally slapped myself for the bad joke.
I walked back to Sarah's room, they were both talking by the window, but stopped when I entered.
"Come on guys, are you seriously gonna do that to me?" I said. Seth looked uncomfortable and turned to look out the window. I glanced at Sarah, I knew she wouldn't hide it from me.
"I was asking him how much it would hurt..." She said. I swallowed hard and glanced at Seth.
"What did he say?" I asked. Sarah didn't answer for a second, I went to go repeat myself thinking she didn't hear me, but Seth turned before she could answer.
"I told her it was the most painful thing I had ever gone through." He said. I stood for a moment, then felt my legs wobble a bit. Seth went to move to grab me, but I moved to Sarah's bed before he could. I laid down and looked up at her ceiling.
"I'm gonna...umm...go clean up the kitchen, we kind of left it a mess last night." Said Sarah. I didn't even look, but I could feel her leave. After a moments pause Seth walked over and sat down next to me. I turned to my side and hugged what part of him I could reach with him sitting at the angle he was. He stroked me back slowly.
"You know you don't have to do this, I won't make you, we could just run." He said.
"Then Zach will come after us." I said. Seth didn't answer.
"It would be more then that actually." He said quietly. I looked up at him. He never looked away from me.
"If we ran, I could never go back, and if we ran into another pack at any givin time, they might attack us." He said. I felt my eyes brows scrunch together.
"But...why would they attack us?" I asked.
"Because I would be seen as a traitor. You have your lone werewolves out there...but there not well like, they aren't trusted, and are usually run out of a territory if discovered, sometimes worse."
I glanced away for a minute then put my head back down.
"But Ashley, we could still do it, I'm just telling you there are places we would have to avoid, permanently." He said.
"Seth...I saw you. You loved being like that...you wouldn't be able to do that anymore if we ran." I said. Seth stiffened up, I knew he hadn't really thought of that. I remembered what Zach had said about having to be on the run a lot, and that was around humans, if someone like them saw him and starting picking up on signs...it could be fatal.
"And Seth...I wanna be like that, I want to be able to run like that with you, with your pack, I want that freedom you had...I'm just scared of it at the same time." I said.
"Ashley..." I felt him sigh when he couldn't think of the right thing to say, then he nudged me over and laid down next to me with his arms wrapped around me.
I half hopped we could stay there forever, and Seth showed no signs of moving, I knew he wouldn't till I did.
I sent a mental wave to my stomach telling it to behave its self, then sat up and looked at Seth. He seemed weary as I crawled off the bed and stretched.
I turned to face him, there was a moment's silence.
"I'm ready." Was all I could say.
I closed the car door, to hard, Seth looked over at me with a worried glance.
"Sorry…" I said sheepishly. He walked to my side of the car and took my hand, we were back in the only patch of woods around the city, I knew we were going to the clearing again .Good, at the very least it would be a place that was recognizable.
I felt my stomach clench as we entered the black dense woods, I let my hands sweep across the passing trees, I know Seth was thinking it too, but all I could get in my head was there was a possibility, a small one he reassured me, but still a chance, I wasn't walking out of these woods tonight. And even if or when I did, I would never be the same again. I would never be, "just Ashley" ever again in my whole life.
I shook my head trying not to let that thought sink in to much, I didn't want Seth to know I was beginning to freak out. It wouldn't be such a bad thing if it was just going to be him and me, that the only person I had to concentrate on was him, but no, the whole pack was going to be here, Zach and Autumn included.
Seth paused outside the clearing and listened.
"Are they here?" I asked. He nodded, then turned to me.
"Ashley if you still want to back out we can, I'm perfectly fine with it." He said. I looked over his face, it was filled with apprehension, I knew if I asked him to he would walk away with me right now….but the apprehension wasn't just about me…he knew what he would lose with himself if he walked away. I smiled at him.
"No your not." I squeezed his hand, then stepped into the clearing with Seth behind me.
Sure enough, Zach sat in the middle of the clearing, I could make out the rest of the pack on the outskirts, there eyes flashing as I stepped in, head held as high as I could without feeling faint. I told myself I could do this, I handled years of abuse, for Pete's sake I was just pushed out of a two story window not to long ago…this was going to be a piece of cake….ugh, yeah right.
"Hello Seth, Ashley." Said Zach, his face, I was surprised to see, carried the same anxiety that Seth's did. I looked past him to the rest of the pack, with the exception of Autumn, who looked almost excited, there was the same nervous look passing from face to face…wow, this was reassuring.
"Are you ready?" Zach asked. I swallowed, I did have one question.
"How does this work? I mean…" I trailed off not knowing how to finished the question.
"Seth will bite you after he's changed." Said Zach looking past me to Seth. I could feel how stiff he was behind me, and cold, he felt cold.
"So, every time one of you bites a human in your wolf form they change?" I asked. Zach shook his head.
"No, we don't have it figured out really, its not like we can go get it tested, it seems to be only when we want to, we don't know if its something in the salvia, or what really, it just seems to work." He said. I thought about this for a minute.
"So…how would you know it doesn't work when you don't want it to? You've bitten a human not wanting to change them?" I had this horrible image of Zach tearing apart a person, I cringed, I know he saw it, he smiled.
"Self defense Ashley, all in self defense."
I looked back at Seth, he just stared back at me with a blank look…I knew what he was doing, I was beginning to think I knew him to well. He was prepping himself for what was coming up. I realized how hard it was going to be for him, someone who had always protected me in some form, was going to have to hurt me, badly, and he knew it. He knew the pain that was involved in this.
"Are you ready?" Zach asked again. I didn't look away from Seth, but I nodded. Then I reached up and hugged Seth, he didn't have a reaction for a minute, then his arms folded around me. I heard a faint growl in the background, then a slapping sound. I knew it was Autumn, and the slapping sound was Winter, if I didn't feel so sick I would have smiled.
"Its ok." I whispered to him. I wanted him to respond with something like that back, God knows I needed to hear it. But he just nodded against my head. He backed up enough so he could see my eyes, I saw a glint of gold in his, he seemed inching to change, I don't know why, but that scared me. I swallowed realizing, this was it. There was no turning back, I was in this a hundred percent.
"How long will it take before I actually change?" I asked, I wanted to know how long I was going to have to mentally prepare myself for the upcoming pain. Seth opened his mouth to respond, but Zach cut him off.
"We picked tonight for a certain reason, Ashley." I turned to face him. He continued. "The full moon myth, like all myths really, has a basis. We aren't forced to change then, but its when we are our strongest, and when you are first bitten, the first time your body changes is on the full moon…we were going to give you longer to get ready for this, but we thought you getting it all over in one night would be much better then going through a week of severe mood swings and extreme random pain."
I let this role around in my head.
"Thank you." I said. Zach looked taken aback, all he did was nod slightly. I saw Winter smile smugly behind him.
I took Seth's hand and raised it up to my face, I let it cup my face, he just stared at me, his eyes were blank, but at the same time he seemed just as afraid as I was.
"Go change." I told him. He didn't move for a minute, then he gently pulled his hand away and walked out of view.
I turned to Zach and tried to smile, I knew it didn't look honest though, and I knew he could see right through it.
"Afraid?" He asked. I laughed shortly.
"No, not at all. I'm just shaking for no reason." I said sarcastically. He smiled, and for the first time, it was actually a nice smile.
I hesitated for a minute. "Can I ask a favor? Though I am aware I don't deserve one." I asked. He looked at me seeming interested.
"Would it be to much to ask…I mean I know you guys have to be here, but could you…try to be out of eye site?" I asked. He looked perplexed for a moment.
"Why?" He asked.
"I know this is the last thing in the world I should be worrying about, but its just…in my nature. I'm kind of embarrassed for anyone to see me going through that much pain…and as you said before, you know what I went through with my dad…I always hid it from people, it just…bothers me." I finished. He didn't say anything, he turned to look behind him, I saw Winter nod her head, then she looked at me and smiled kindly.
"Alright, we'll stay our of view." He said. I was surprised, I was sure he was going to say no. Just one more thing to do to me.
We both turned as we heard rustling behind me. Seth came loping out, he seemed like he was sticking low to the ground, almost guiltily. I frowned, I didn't want this to be to hard on him, and plus I was kind of hoping he could support me on this…but, this would be hard for both of us, and I had a feeling after he did his part, he was going to give me all the support I needed, I would just have to handle it till then, no big, I've done it before.
Zach looked at us both, then turned and walk to the edge of the clearing with the rest of the pack, I watched as they disappeared into the darkness, I knew they were only thirty, forty feet away, but it was still easier now that I couldn't see them.
I sat down in the middle of the clearing, Seth walked up to me, I reached out and hugged him around the neck, his coarse fur itching my face, but at the same time it felt good. I let go and looked at him nervously.
"You know…after you bite me I expect you to wait on me hand and foot." I said. He tilted his head to one side. "Guess I'm kind of a bitch that way, huh?" I said. His eyes flashed for a moment, then he nuzzled my face. I smiled, then braced myself, I was aware of how close his mouth was to my skin, I knew he wasn't going to warn me before he did it, but he still gave it away, I felt his body stiffen up, my hand was still on the fur around his neck, the other was on the ground next to me. I gasped when I felt his teeth sink into the bottom of my neck, right before my shoulder. I felt my hand yank on his hair, he growled, but didn't bite harder. My other hand scrapped the ground next to me, I could feel small pebbles and grass digging under my finger nails. He hung on for a moment, then let go. My hand instinctively flew to the spot were he bit me, he glanced at me for a minute, then turned and ran off to where he took his cloths off. Not even a minute later he rushed back just in his jeans, his other articles of clothing forgotten.
He glanced at me, I could see where he had tried to wipe the blood off his mouth, I wanted to reach up and clean it off, but when I tried moving my hand, it lifted part way, then just fell back to the ground. He reached up and quickly swiped at his face almost like he was disgusted with himself.
I felt dizzy, nauseously dizzy. But there was no pain yet, I wobbled trying to keep myself sitting up. Seth sat down and pulled me towards him, I fell into him, he moved me so my head was on his lap, he brushed the hair out of my face.
"How long before the pain kicks in?" I asked, my voice sounded drunk. He paused, then shrugged.
"Its different for everyone…I see part of the effects are already kicking in." He said as my eyes started to roll around, I shut them, I felt almost like my essence was being torn out of my body.
I went to go say something, but right as I opened my mouth, electric hot pain tore up my spine, I cried out and instantly turned to my side in the fetal position I had taken so many times before when my father beat me. I felt Seth stiffen up, then his arms were around me, he was leaning over me, almost like he could ward of the pain.
I bit my lip refusing to scream, my muscles started burning, almost like someone had peeled back my skin and put a match to them, I jerked and kicked thinking some how I could get rid of it that way. Seth hung onto me refusing to let go. I tasted blood in my mouth as I bit down on my lip to hard, but I still refused to scream. I kept thinking how many times I had failed on that one before with my father, I knew I was going to make it, but I wanted to last as long as I could, plus it gave me something to focus on. I opened my eyes but everything was smeared together in a blob of dark colors, somewhere in the back of my mind a Van Gough painting popped into my head.
"Seth." Zach's voice entered the clearing from some where, Seth didn't move.
"Seth, the moons coming out." He said.
"You need to tell her!" Winter yelled from some where farther off then Zach.
"Ashley…" Said Seth quietly. I jerked again as the pain spread from my spine to the back of my head, my head shot back, my hands clawed at the ground next to me. I knew Seth was saying something but I couldn't hear it. I think he knew this. He repeated himself, I struggled to make out what he said, he had to repeat it a third time for me to catch it all.
"Don't freak out, but in a little bit, your going to feel things start to change in you, drastically, your bones are going to shift and bend, its very painful, and very uncomfortable" He told me. I jerked again and curled up into a ball pulling my knees to my chest, I could feel tears running down my face, they burned my skin as they rolled down. I gasped unable to catch my breath, I could feel myself shaking. I wanted to pass out, I wanted to be gone for all of this, but it seemed my pain tolerance was to high. I could feel my conscious pulling towards blacking out, but it just wouldn't let me.
I started to uncurl, I could feel the pain fading away. I shifted to glance at Seth, I realized by the look on his face this was simply the calm before the storm. He reached towards me and wiped something off my face, I looked at his hand, his fingers had blood on it.
"You shouldn't bite your lip…" He said. He seemed at a loss for words. I just smiled at him, I felt so tired. I glanced up at the sky, the whole clearing was lit up with the moon. My eyes seemed stuck to it. I could even feel them dilating, I could feel it. I blinked rapidly trying to get myself to look away.
"Brace yourself." Seth said. For a moment, right as I realized what was coming, time seemed to freeze, I didn't breath, didn't move, and neither did Seth, everything seemed perfectly still.
Then it started.
I took a sharp breath in as my legs stretched out on there own will, my arms flew away from me, almost like the sign of the cross. Seth picked up my head and laid it on the ground, he kneeled looking down at me, his face twisted with worry. I slammed my eyes shut, I told myself I wasn't going to scream, but that was before the real pain started.
I felt my mouth snap open, I knew I was screaming, but I couldn't hear it, I couldn't hear anything, I opened my eyes, I couldn't see anything either, it was black. I screamed harder, so much so I felt Seth's hand over my mouth. I could FEEL my bones moving, slightly at first, then so much I twisted to my side, I couldn't even scream anymore, I was vaguely aware I was trying to, but I knew I wasn't making a sound. I subsided into whimpers. I flipped from my side to my stomach, I clawed at the ground under me, this was to much. Sound was starting to come back, but it was muffled.
"Ashley I'm sorry, I'm so sorry." Said Seth, I felt his hands on the back of my head. I started to jerk around, worse then before, I tried to prop myself up, but I just fell back down. I started to scream again, something was happening, my spine started to curve, I followed it not wanting to fight it, I could feel a snap in my leg which led to another scream.
My wish to black out was coming, I could feel it, I couldn't handle this, it was to much pain, all the years of my fathers abuse combined was nothing compared to this, I could feel bones snapping into place, my muscles felt as if they were tearing then reconnecting, they burned like they were on fire. My skins was shifting, I could actually feel it moving. I wanted to call out to Seth, I wanted to scream out for him, but I couldn't. I took one look up, saw his face, my eyes couldn't focus on detail, then I looked back down. Something else snapped, I screamed yet again, and rolled to my side, after that, I slipped away into blackness, it came quick and unexpected.
"Do you think she will be alright?"
"Yes Seth, she'll be ok once she wakes up…you and Winter both passed out, I was honestly afraid she wouldn't, she seems to have a high pain tolerance."
The first thing my mind jumped to was to freak out, I was aware there was something drastically different then when I blacked out. I felt my heart speed up as I tried to feel out what it was. I felt odd, almost alien, I was laying on the ground, but my feet and arms felt short, and I was laying in a weird position.
"I think she's awake…." Came Winters voice. I heard quick foot steps. I knew there was someone kneeling next to me, I assumed it was Seth, but I was to afraid to open my eyes yet.
"Ashley?...Ashley are you awake?" He asked. I felt his hand touch me, but he wasn't touching skin, it was weird, I felt like he was touching a outer extension of my skin, it wasn't as sensitive as my skin.
I opened my eyes wearily. Seth was standing above me, his eyes didn't seemed worried, or afraid, he looked amazed. I glanced behind him and saw Zach and Winter, they both had the same expression. I wanted to ask why, but I realized I couldn't talk. Then it hit me, I wasn't human anymore. I tried standing up, but I just wobbled and fell back over. Seth smiled, I'm sure even with my new face I looked embarrassed.
"It was hard for me to stand up at first too…come here." He reached over and grabbed me around the stomach, he lifted me up and helped me, I tried to be aware I had four legs now and not just too, which trust me, is more difficult then it sounds. I stood experimentally, but didn't dare try walking yet.
I looked up at them wondering why they were staring at me, then a horrible thought hit me. With my luck it was very possible I could some how be the worlds only ugly werewolf, I suddenly felt self conscious and stupid. I wanted to run away and hide somewhere but I couldn't. Instead of looking at them, I tried picking up on all that had changed, there was defiantly many different things, but they were still coming to me. For one everything smelled more clear, more potent. And I could see! Man could I see, it was almost pitch black out, the moon cast over by clouds, but I could make out Seth's face as clearly as if it was noon on a cloudless day. Everything had a odd grayish tint do it though, it bugged me but I figured I could get use to it. I looked down at my feet….no…paws, oh my God I have paws. I tried lifted one, my front left one, I had always been left handed, I wobbled a little but didn't fall over. I put it back down and picked up the right one, same thing happened. I looked back up at Seth with the reaction to smile, I spun around when I felt movement behind me.
Suddenly Zach, Winter, and Seth all broke out into laughter. I spun back around and tilted my head at Seth.
"That's your tail Ashley, I know it feels weird at first, you'll get use to it. You just wagged it." He said smiling.
I wanted to blush, but I knew I couldn't. I felt idiotic. Seth seemed to realize that. He glanced at Zach who sighed dramatically.
"Go ahead if you must, but, don't go far, you know how hard it is at first." He nodded and disappeared for a second. I waited patiently feeling apprehensive about trying to walk, or even greater fear, run, with Seth when he came back.
He came back and nudged my side, I was shocked to realize I could feel what he was feeling. He wagged his tail, I knew he must have felt my shock, he was happy, and he seemed a bit apprehensive also. He glanced down at my paws, then back at me, the next feeling he felt was curiosity. I let out a nervous wave to let him know how I felt, he just nudged my face.
I paused for a minute, then tried taking a few steps, they were clumsy, and I almost fell a few times, but I could, in fact, move. I almost freaked out again when I felt that weird movement behind me, but I contained myself. I had looked enough like a idiot for tonight.
Seth walked ahead of me a little bit, then back at me, his whole look screamed, "Follow me" It felt weird to be able to understand him this clearly without words. I took a couple clumsy steps after him, and we disappeared into the forest, it was hard for me to keep up with him first, but after sometime I was able to walk fast next to him.
Another new thing hit me, I realized objects, like fallen branch's, rocks, etc, in my path almost seemed to have a slight discolor to them, they were set apart from everything else, easier to pick up on so I didn't trip, I barley had to even look down at my feet as I loped after Seth.
I decided to try something, I nipped at Seth's back end, he spun around, and I darted past him taking off into the forest, I heard him bark then the crashing of branches behind me as he tried to catch me, unfortunately he did, one minute I was running and the next I felt him slam into me and both of us go tumbling into the grass, I growled…whoa, I just growled…weird. Anyway, I growled at him and tried to get him off, but he just sat there with me pinned, he felt amused, and there was a tinge of cockiness. I knew he felt my annoyance. Then I had a idea, I licked his face, he seemed taken aback, I tried sending out as mooshy signals as I could, he started to fall for it, but then he got a hold of a little mischvious twinge, but it was to late, I jumped out from underneath him and took off again. He caught up to me but didn't try to stop me, he just ran beside me, after a few minutes I was aware of more around us, the whole pack was running some where not to far away, probably just to keep a eye to make sure everything was safe. We ran like that for hours, and it felt wonderful, we must have circled the woods at least three times, I didn't want to stop, I never felt so free, so untouchable, and so close to Seth. Finely Seth started to get tired next to me and began to slow down, I regrettably did to. We had reached a small pond in the middle of the forest, I could see the rest of the pack on the other side taking a break.
The one who was clearly Zach, the largest with grey and white coloring, almost like a timber wolf, but not exactly, was sitting by the edge of the pond looking over at Seth and me. He seemed so superior, I felt very small under his gaze.
Seth nudged me. I feeling of awe hit me as he looked over me, the ugly thought struck me again and I inwardly cringe. His ear twitched as my feelings hit him, I got confusion from him in return. I tried blocking the feeling of insecurity that came out, but I'm not sure how your suppose to really do that. He seemed upset and started pacing around me, I tried following him, but it was hard, he moved so much more gracefully then me. He pushed me from the side towards the pond, I turned and questioned him, he just nudged me. I went right up to the edge and looked back at him, he sunk his head low and looked at the water. The moon shone on the surface of the pond making it a perfect mirror, I realized he wanted me to see what I looked like. I wasn't sure if I wanted to or not, but I stepped forward anyway.
I was baffled by what I saw…I pure white wolf stared back at me, so white it put the moon to shame. I just stared, I moved my head, and so did the wolf in the pond, I moved closer, so did she. I looked back at Seth, confusion pouring out of me. He walked to the edge and stood next to me looking down, his reflection appeared next to mine. How could that be me? The wolf in the reflection was beautiful, white as snow with heavily lined black eyes that shone…green. As green as my mothers. I couldn't move away from the edge, I glanced up at the other end of the pond, all but one wolf, a tan one I guessed was Autumn, was standing at the edge looking at me, I knew they were waiting for my reflection. I stared at Seth, I know he was waiting to, I thought for a minute, then pounced on him playfully.
It was a week later, I was in Sarah's room, she was sniffing into a tissue. Seth was helping me pack up my things.
"How often will I see you?" She asked. I looked at Seth and smiled. I turned to Sarah.
"Twice a year, once on your birthday, and once around Christmas, I made him promise." I said.
Things had been odd this week, I had changed every night since my first time, the first three nights were horrible, the pain was almost to much, but by the fourth night it was only a slight pain, defiantly noticeable, but not even a fifth of what it was the first night. The pack, except for Autumn of course, had excepted me, and were currently teaching me how to hunt, which so far is really the hardest part for me.
"Where are you going?" She asked.
"Colorado." Said Seth. "Around the mountains, near a ski resort."
Sarah nodded and sniffed again. My hands picked up a weird object out of my dresser drawer, I smiled down at the soup dispenser that had once saved me. I tossed it from hand to hand, then turned to Sarah, she glanced down at it and smiled, I had told her what it meant to me. It was the last piece of my old life I really had.
"Sarah I want you to keep this for me." I said. She looked surprised and took it as I handed it her like it was the most precious thing she had ever held.
"Keep it for me until I can take it when I know nothing will happen to it." I said. I know that might never happen, but I wanted her to have something of importance from me, and I really didn't have much to give. I packed my moms jewelry, and besides that, it was it, all I had, all fit nicely into one backpack.
We walked down the stairs, I hugged Sarah's teary eyed mom good bye, she thought Seth and me were going off to get eloped, that's what Sarah and me planned to tell anyone who asked, which might be a total of, like…five people.
Sarah walked us out to the car, I through my bag in the back, then turned to Sarah. She wasn't even trying to hide her tears now. I felt my own eyes water. I opened my arms and she ran into them.
"I promise I'll right, as often as I can." I said. She nodded against my chest. She hugged me so hard I couldn't breathe for a minute, then let go. I got into the car with Seth and waved till she, and her house, the house I had spent so much of my childhood in, the only real friend I had ever had, was out of view. I sniffed in the car, Seth reached for my hand and I took it thankfully.
"Where are we meeting everyone else at?" I asked to change my train of thought.
"We are meeting them at the airport in the next town." He said. I nodded.
We drove for about five minutes, my mind wondering over different things. It hit me something didn't feel right…something didn't feel…finished.
I pondered over it for a few minutes, then we passed the hospital.
"Seth stop." I said. He looked at me curiously, I pointed to the hospital, his face seemed to grow cold.
"Ashley…" He warned.
"Seth…please, I need this." I said, I knew my look was pleading. He paused, then turned into the nearest entrance.
I walked through the hospital halls in a daze, I asked a nurse for his room number, he had been moved to a different room. Seth and me made are way slowly to it, I glanced at the door, then at Seth.
"Seth, can you wait outside…just for a few minutes?" I asked. He nodded and let go of my hand.
I took a deep breath, then opened the door. The nurse had told me that he had been slipping in and out of consciousness, I was slightly happy to find him asleep. I wanted to do this, but I didn't think I could face him while he was awake.
I stepped up to the bed, he looked better, he wasn't wrapped up so much, but the pieces of skin that were exposed were severely scared and damaged.
"Hey Dad…" I said quietly not daring to take the chance to wake him. The room was deathly silent, except for his monitors, as I tried to figure out what to say.
"Dad…I'm leaving…I don't even know if you can hear me or not…but I had to come see you…you see, Dad, I forgive you for everything you have done to me, I know that the person you really were died when Mom left…I just hope that man isn't gone forever…I want you to know I am with someone who really loves me, and I know he will take care of me…"
I paused, he seemed so vulnerable now. I thought about it, then leaned forward and kisses his for head, I felt a tear roll down and drop off on his head, I watched as it rolled down to his eye, ironically, and rolled down his own face. I realized this was finely it, I had walked out of the house were years of abuse had taken place, the place my mother decided to destroy both him and me. I had left my best and truest friend, and in a couple hours I would be leaving the town I was born in, suffered in, loved in…the only place I had ever known.
"Ashley?" Seth said opening the door. I smiled and he walked up to the bed, he looked simply sick seeing my dad, I just squeezed his hand and told him it was ok. I looked one more time at my Dad, I knew that would probably be the last time I ever saw him, but oddly, it seemed better that he was asleep for this, that I never got to hear him say good bye, or that he could never really hear me…this way I felt like I was talking to the man I really knew as "Daddy"….
Seth and me walked to the door, I had my hand on the handle and a thought occurred to me. This was my happily ever after, but it wasn't the end…no, I was starting my story. My story didn't end with those words…no, my story starts now, with Happily Ever After. I smiled one last time into the room, looked at Seth who smiled back, I stared down at my hand resting on the handle, and I knew this would be the last door I ever had to close to my past….and…I closed it.
Happily Ever After