2So here I am, on a gorgeous Saturday morning, setting up for what is going to be a fucking fantastic day. The birds are singing, children are dancing, and my friends are throwing sunshine out of their asses. So why am I so blue? I snapped out of my gloomy thoughts when Matt waved his hands before my eyes.
Grinning, I apologised, "Whoops. Sorry. Spaced out there for a second."
He teased, "I couldn't have guessed. It's not like you ever do that."
Sarcasm. It's a way of life with my friends. Even when they're trying to be nice it just slips out. The way a two tonne baby slips out of a chipmunk's ass. Not a pretty sight, and not even that funny. Mostly it's just disturbing and faintly annoying.
I responded by giving him a few suggestions about where he could stick his observations.
Sandra laughed, just a wee bit impressed, as she passed us. "Wow, I don't think that's even physically possible. Maybe me and Karash should try that some time."
Okay. Bad images. Really bad images.
Karash (or as Dean likes to call him, Krash. Yes, my friends are suckers for lame jokes. But since I call him Kinky Krash, I guess I'm not any better) is Sandra's boyfriend. He is handsome and funny but a bit of a douche. Sandra always makes excuses for him, but even she can't cover up his overwhelming douchieness. I think she doesn't even like him that much. Well, she likes to touch him. Sandra isn't like her namesake from Grease, if you get where I'm going.
"Anyways, children, can we get started with warming up for the performance now?" Dean asked.
"Sure thang," I replied and quickly hopped off the amp where I had been perched and walked up to the microphone. "Testing, testing, Dean still wets his bed at night..."
Sandra and Matt snickered while Dean glared at me.
"Kay you guys," I continued, "Let's start with the opening bars of The Way I Am".
Sandra began playing on the guitar while Dean quickly moved to the bongos.
"If you were falling
Then I would catch you
You need a Light
I'll find a match..."
Singing always puts me in a good mood. I just love the combination of atmosphere, melody, lyrics and how beautiful everything sounds together.
A while later, we had finished setting up for the show, which was stupidly enough, called The Show. We decided to take a quick breather and headed out for a peek at the fair. It was gorgeous, and massive, since towns from other areas had gathered here to set up booths. I shaded my eyes, and gazed up at the sky. Sure enough, we had a few of those mini roller coasters you can rent and the inevitable Ferris wheel.
My friends and I chatted and laughed as we strolled around the festival. Sandra bought some pad thai that we shared, and Dean bought a huge thing of curry and nan. Our festival is pretty multi-cultural. None of that hot dogs and hamburgers only shtick around here. Although I did love me some funnel cake.
We were having a pretty good time, until we ran into Jackass. Okay, his real name is Jack, but I always thought my private nickname was rather fitting. Jack and his crew of "bad-boys" whistled, and he sauntered up to me.
"Hey Key. Looking good. Did you wear that dress for me?"
Jack had a self-proclaimed crush on me. Well, actually, he said, first day of ninth that he would bang me before the year was up. Yeah, didn't happen. I'm in eleventh now, but he still hasn't given up his torch for me. A torch, which supposedly, "burned with the passion of a thousand suns." His words, not mine. It was sort of a long-standing joke, but sometimes, he could get annoyingly persistent.
I rolled my eyes. Hardly. I smoothed out my breezy white summer dress, and then looking into his eyes, flipped him off.
"Babe", he laughed "When are you going to stop fighting it? You know you want a piece of all this gorgeousness. All you have to do is ask."
Jack is pretty cute, all muscle and tanned skin. But what self-respecting girl would go out with a guy who had bet all his friends he would be able to have sex with me? Although his moral flaws are definitely there, he's still not that bad of a guy. Our previous history ruined anything he might have offered me.
Straightfaced, I replied, "Jack, as much as it pains me to say this, since I have nothing against people who swing that way, you do realise you sound like you stepped out of Queer Eye for the Straight Guy, right? And about me wanting you? Babe," I stressed, "I couldn't want you less than if I was surrounded by hundreds of people who looked infinitely hotter than you." I then paused, to take a dramatic look around, faking surprise. "Why, would you look at that? I am."
Grinning, I patted him on the cheek and strolled off, leaving behind five or so sniggering wannabe gangsters, one shocked and confused boy and a trail of friends, who followed me, laughing their asses off.
Sandra slipped her arm around me, smacking me with a kiss on the cheek. "You are hilarious. I knew there was a reason why we keep you around."
I laughed and gave her a hug. "I remember when I used to be all shy and innocent. You and Dean took that away and never gave it back."
Dean scoffed. "You're still innocent. You just have some bite now."
I grinned at Matt, who just gave me an approving smile. I smiled and went up to him, snuggling into his side. God, I loved my friends.
Suddenly, I heard a familiar voice. "Wow. Your town goes crazy for this fair? It's okay I guess. It doesn't even compare to Toronto. And I hate how the performance tent is set up. Seriously, blue and white is so overdone."
Eep! There was Christian's deep, bored rumble. But wait! He was insulting our fair! What an ass. I guess looks don't always equate personality.
Sandra snickered and whispered softly to me in a posh tone, "Oh dear, what a dreadful fair!" She trilled, "We have such better shebangs in big ol' T.O.! Oh and my diamond shoes are too tight and where the fuck did I leave my doll?"
I snickered back and whispered in the same hoity-toity-queen-of-England accent, "Oh now I remember! What a silly little woman I am! I left it with the gardener! You know the one that I banged back in Toronto, because nobody here is good enough!"
By now Dean and Matt had started chuckling, and we were on our way to a good bitch/laugh fest when Sandra gulped and stopped laughing. Since I'm an idiot, I didn't notice these signs, I was still laughing when Dean and Matt had cleared their throats and stopped.
Therefore, I was extremely startled, when somebody tapped me on the shoulder. I whipped around and hit something hard with my hand.
"Ouch! That hurt!" And my hand did hurt. Like a mother. On crack.
An angry Christian Thatcher- that seemed to be his permanent state- glared back. "'That hurt!' What the fuck! How about my fucking nose!"
Some of Christian's friends were behind him, laughing uncontrollably, probably at the thought of a tiny little girl like me popping out big tough Christian's nose.
I peered up at his nose, which was admittedly, slightly bloody. He popped it back in place with a sickening crunch. I shrugged, playing it cool. My heart pounded in my chest, and that little breathless, almost painful lurch to my heart, that happened whenever I saw him, zinged me. Inside I was dying a little, but I didn't want him to think that he affected me. Or my over imaginative mind, which was already picturing scenes where I would tenderly bandaged the wound, and we would gaze lovingly into each other eyes, and he would start falling for me, and would lean closer, closer to my lips...
Sandra nudged me a little, effectively stopping my dream from becoming any raunchier. I smiled at her, and then looked coolly back at him. "Don't be a bloody girl. I've gotten broken noses with less fuss."
"Excuse me?" he exclaimed, "You hit me, and then insult me?!"
"Look, I'm sorry I hit you." I sighed. I hoped it wouldn't do any damage. I kinda liked his face all perfect-like. Although maybe a crooked nose would just add to his charm. Argh, I wander too much in my brain. "And I didn't insult you, just your manliness." Whoops, I couldn't believe that popped out. I probably shouldn't have said that when I'm apologising to a guy.
His lips twitched into a slight smile, before quickly smoothing into a smirk.
I wondered if I had imagined that quick flash of smile, but pushed it out of my head.
"You wanna bet on that, sweetheart?"
Okay, I did not swoon a little when he called me sweetheart. That was a rush of... indignation. Indignation at him being patronised.
"How about we bet on whether this fair is too lame for you city boy's tastes?" I asked cockily. I can be cocky when I want to be. It's all about pretending you have more than you do. Which happened all the time when it came to talking about my social life. I joke, I joke. I'm not that much of a loser. Dear god, at least I don't think so.
"Okay" He agreed.
Wait, what the fuck? Did he just agree? What am I doing? I thought that I was getting over him. I didn't really want to deal with him, anyways. It would just fuel my pathetic crush, and leave me stranded, bleeding on the pavement (You know, where he would kick me). Even though the pavement in our town was quite nice. Our psychotic major saw to that. He had been trying to get the best mayor award (in our region) for quite some time now. His obsession leads him to do some... peculiar things.
"Uhhh..." I fumbled.
"You're not going to try to back out of it now, are you?" He said mockingly. "That wouldn't be very... brave of you." Christian smirked, and I found that, as gorgeous as it was, the smirk was kind of getting annoying, fast. It was very "bitch, I know I'm right, oh and all the girls love me."
I frowned. Why was he pushing this? But, still, I definitely did not want to be called a coward. Besides, I was proud of our little town and he was dumping all over it.
"Fine. What are the terms?" And I gave him my own little smirk. Hopefully it came off more as a "Hey, douchebag, I know what you're doing and I'm going kick your ass so hard, it'll come out of your mouth" smirk then a "oh god, oh god, please don't let him hurt me" smirk.
"Okay... we do whatever you want at this fair. And I'll have to judge whether or not I had fun by the end. If I win..." He paused, thinking and then continued. "If I win, you have to find a way to get the girls at the school to back off. And you have to bake me cookies."
I snorted. I cannot believe he just asked me to bake him cookies. I'll deal with the fan-girls later.
"Counter offer. My friends have to judge whether or not you like the fair, because obviously you're biased."
"So are your friends." he shot back.
"Fine, two of your friends, and two of mine."
"Deal."
"Oh and if I win, you have to tell the entire school you were being a snobby little bitch and you have to say that you had a really good time at the fair. In your underwear."
He glared at me, obviously regretting this bet, since he thought I had the easier side of the bargain. Please, has he not met the girls at our school? We've been starved of hotness for a few years, and the cute boys we did know, we had lived with them for all our lives. It was a bit like incest to date them. It would be extremely difficult to get them to give up Christian. Though I'm sure a few STD's would do the trick...
While we had been talking, our friends had been conferring, and had decided who would be the panel of "judges". Everyone was really into it, but I think that was because, nothing exciting really happens in our town. Although I think some girls were just excited at the prospect of seeing Christian in his underwear. Some girls whispered to me that they would help me, when Christian was busy talking to his friends. I grinned evilly, since that had been part of my plan.
After a quick conference with Sandry, Dean, Matt and a crowd of girls who were obviously on my side, I clapped my hands for attention.
"Kay gang, first stop is..."
AN: Please review, I want to hear if my story is good or not. Or if it's incredibly clichéd and juvenile. Criticism would be great. Oh and what are your thoughts on Christian and Key?