Monster

I want to run.

And I want to scream.

Because I can't take it anymore.

It's all caving in.

Everything's finally getting to me.

Everything's being connected.

And I just can't handle it.

So I run.

I tear through the forest.

Briars cut my arms.

I deserve it.

Tree limbs slap my face.

I deserve it.

Keep on running.

Who cares if I fall.

Face in the mud.

I deserve it.

Get up!

Keep on running!

Until I finally hit my knees.

Tears streaming down my dirty face.

Blood crawling down my arms.

I look up at the clouded sky.

And I scream.

Cutting trough the silence.

Keep on screaming.

Until my lungs burst.

I deserve it.

Don't stop!

Keep on screaming!

Until I finally go hoarse.

Can't utter another cry.

Tears are gone.

Can't cry anymore.

I'm still bleeding though.

Maybe I'll bleed to death.

I deserve that.

I look up at the clouded sky.

And it starts to rain.

Raindrops replace tears.

Rain mixes with blood.

Then I remember something.

A friend once told me,

That when it rains,

It's the angels crying.

Angels better not be crying over me.

I deserve no sympathy.

Not from anyone.

Not from angels

Not from God

Not from the best friend I lost

Not from the girl who doesn't know I love her

Not from myself

And certainly not from you.

I'm a monster.

An undeserving monster.

A monster who runs away.

And screams to heaven.