"My mother was very fond of storybooks. Even after the age that most young boys outgrow such whimsical fantasies, she read them to me, night after night. One line has stuck with me throughout my seventeen years: 'When bodies break and life escapes my shadow stands alone, though without me it cannot be so where then will I go?' Ironically enough this line was haunting my tired mind the night my life both ended and began."
Chapter 1: Bittersweet
Having a late birthday always frustrated me because what few friends I had would often take precious time out of their slowly ending lives to taunt me with their status as my elders. Matthew was spouting one such tirade on June second, just one day before he could no longer do so. Claiming months instead of years simply didn't cut it for him. "Young-un',go and fetch me a sandwich." He teased, stroking an invisible beard. "Matthew Atkinson, you are approximately four months my elder, such a miniscule difference in age hardly qualifies you to order me around." He narrowed his eyes at me, farcical displeasure painted across his face, "By difference you must mean advantage." He said briskly, continuing his charade. "-And it most certainly does qualify me to order you to get something for me, my aging muscles will soon be entirely unable to support me, unlike your young, still-flourishing 'weapons.'" I snorted and rolled my eyes, but consented to go and get him a sandwich from the cooler in the back of his truck.
It was a Friday night, the last Friday night before graduation. We were parked in the parking lot of the Firstfall (Michigan) recreational league football field where the South City High School football team skirmished illegally. It was against league rules to practice at certain times out of season (at least in full pads) but the coach decided the football program needed a bit of a boost, so bored, Matthew, Lauren, Alex, Jackson, and myself had decided to come watch people needlessly brutalize one another. Matthew was a big kid, but his parents were devout Jehovah's Witnesses, and against violence even in sport. His dark eyebrows sometimes knit together in some sort of concealed emotion beneath his medium length hair as he watched the team practice.
Jackson was short and stout, his white-blond hair was cut short into a buzz cut that left much to be desired in the scalp-coverage department, his struggling goatee was more peach fuzz than anything but it still fluttered in the breeze as he lounged with Lauren on the tailgate. Lauren and Jackson were together and considered an adorable couple by the gossip authorities, Lauren's slightly darker blonde hair was tied back into a pony tail and her brown eyes were locked to his, oblivious to the presence of others. Her attitude sometimes made the others- me included, uncomfortable, but Jackson made her behave in public. I leaned my head back as far as I could, turning my vision upside down in an effort to catch sight of Alex, perched tenuously on the roof of the cab. She finished chewing her bite of sandwich and stuck her tongue out at me for watching her eat. I returned the favor, idly wondering if my attempt at nonchalance had adequately disguised my desire to look at her.
Alex was gorgeous, her ebony hair reached down to the middle of her back while her bangs rested on either side of her face, emphasizing her incredible light blue eyes. Few males could have resisted her, but many claimed to be able to do so due to her incredibly light skin, Alex seemed to have a strange ability to resist the power of the sun- no matter the temperature she always seemed to be cold, and her skin never changed its pale appearance. She would have been an absolute princess in the Elizabethan era, but pale skin had gone out of style since then. I jerked my gaze back towards the skirmish when she cocked her head slightly, peering at me with a slight frown. I realized then that I had been openly staring at her upside down while my speculations ran through my head. I mentally slapped myself. As I turned back I heard the tell-tale crack of helmets colliding, and a player went down grasping frantically at his obviously-hurt neck. The coach blew his annoyingly shrill whistle before trotting out onto the field. "This is over, I think." Said Jackson as Lauren sighed. "They don't have enough players to fill in for him." I nodded slightly, annoyed that we would be parting ways so early. I felt comfortable around my friends, and I knew that our time together was drawing to a close as graduation hurtled toward us from just behind the sunrise.
I mentally resigned myself to that inevitable fact and stood up, turning around to face Matthew's truck as I did so. Jackson wore his usual expression of content as Lauren cuddled against him with her eyes closed. Matthew had brightened, a grin painted on his features. "No Matthew, they won't let you, man." I said softly, knowing this was thin ice. "You don't know that!" He snapped, standing to begin his journey across the field to offer his assistance in the game. "Matt. Don't be an idiot. The coach will call your parents, I'm not going to sit here and let you be the cause of your grounding the day before graduation." Said Jackson with a hint of a scowl. Matthew stood up straighter, preparing to argue, but then relaxed and nodded in our direction. "There's truth to that." He said with resignation. I turned to nod appreciatively in Jackson's direction, but stopped abruptly when I caught Alex's eye. She was wearing an expression I wasn't used to seeing on her face: Sadness, deep sadness. A single tear rolled down her cheek. "Alex?" I felt a sudden surge of dislike for Matthew as he questioned her. "Something wrong?" She broke eye contact with me and smiled, "Just sweating a bit." She lied smoothly, wiping the moisture from her cheek. "But you…" He began before I impaled him with a glare.
She slid herself carefully off of the top of the cab into the bed of the truck and took my offered hand to help her down. "Now that the game is over, I think I'll go on home, feeling a little feverish, I think." Matthew, brash as ever, received another impaling glance from me before he could suggest an alternative course of action, "Okay Alex. Hope you feel better, after all, tomorrow is the day." I flashed her a gentle smile just as she managed to wipe the expression that had scared me before off of her face again. "I'll be ready for it! I'll see you guys tomorrow, cap n' gown." As she departed the happy couple spoke up with their decision to leave, and Matthew reluctantly followed suit, leaving me standing alone in the parking lot with my hands in the pockets of my jeans. My phone vibrated in my pocket and I slid it open, revealing Alex's request. "Come here, please." I turned and walked to the car, taking a seat beside her. "You okay?" I asked tentatively, closing my phone as I slid it back into my pocket. I didn't like seeing her sad like this, I had long ago given up on her, she was way out of my league, but I still cared for her. "You'll come visit me, right?" She asked, trying to steady her voice. I smiled again, "I'd like nothing better." I assured her. She looked at me, sadness still in his eyes, now coupled with curiosity. "Sometimes I get feelings Adam. And they aren't usually wrong… When you were looking at me tonight, I suddenly knew I was going to lose you." Now it was my turn to be curious, but I stifled it, looking at her seriously. I reached up and put my hand on her cheek. "Now listen here girl. Your feelings ain't da boss of me." She smiled her pretty smile and leaned over to kiss me on the cheek. "For once, I'm glad you don't listen to me." She said softly, unlocking the car. "I wish I had a tape recorder for that one." I retorted as I lifted myself out of her car and headed towards my jeep. I waved at her over my shoulder and saw her hide her sadness again.