8Facing Fears.
It was on that fateful sunny Friday morning. I was sitting on the porch, reading a classical book and sipping my homemade vanilla smoothie. And just when I thought my day would be just an ordinary summer day, he came along.
He was my childhood playmate, Marcus. He lived next door. We had a love-hate relationship back when when were kids. He found me annoying because I followed him every where he went but I admired him because he was strong and he could do anything and get away with it; he pushed me to do things I knew my mother wouldn't like but I did them anyway. We stopped talking after I fell off the roof and broke my arm and my mother told me never to play with him again. That was ten years ago.
"Yo!" he greeted coolly as he jumped over the fence that separated our property from theirs. I looked behind me to see if he was talking to someone else but there was no one there. "Kaykay," he called.
Kaykay was my nickname from him when we were younger; Kaylee was my real name. I blinked at him, surprised that he still remembered. "Hey, can I help you?"
He now ruled our school with his good-looks and charms while I was one of the 'invisibles' in school. He never talked to me so it was a shock when he suddenly did.
"What are you doing?" he asked, sitting on the vacant recliner next to mine. He even took my drink without asking me.
I glared at him, "I'm reading a book, can't you see?" I answered, annoyed. He was ruining my day and now he was drinking my smoothie too?
"Oh, is that what you're going to do all day?" he asked innocently
"Yup, that's my plan!" I snapped my book shut and looked at him, "What do you want Marcus?"
He scratched the back of his head and looked as if he wanted to ask me something. "I'm bored, do something with me," it sounded more like a command than a question. I just stared at him as if he was crazy.
"No,"
"Please," he pressed his hands together under his chin, like he was praying. I smirked, this was the first time I'd seen him beg. He must be bored as hell.
"The last time I did something with you, I fell off the roof and I broke my arm! The answer is no," I told him, getting back to my book.
He pouted, "That was ten years ago and it wasn't my fault! Please, I'm going crazy here doing nothing!" his voice was desperate. I wanted to laugh but instead I ignored him. But being Marcus, he grabbed my book and threw it over the fence. I gaped at him, then glared and then crossed my arms over my chest, pouting childishly.
"Where are your friends?"
"They've all gone on holiday," he answered,
Sighing, I finally gave in. I knew he wouldn't stop bothering me until I agreed. "Fine, what do you want to do?"
Grinning, he cheered like a child. "I want to go to the fair,"
Marcus and I walked around for a bit, he would duck and hide every time he saw someone he knew from school. I knew he was too embarrass to be seen with me so I just let him; I was used to it and didn't find it offensive at all though it hurt a little. The popular people never mixed with the invisibles of the school, it was seen as a social suicide if a popular person was seen with someone in the lower social ladder; it was the school's unwritten rule and people like Marcus stuck to that rule to save their reputations.
I wasn't ugly but I wasn't attractive either. I was just average looking with light brown hair and green eyes. I was short for my age too and sometimes I was mistaken for a fifteen year old instead of eighteen so there was no wonder I became one of the invisibles of the school.
"I want some candy floss, do you want some?" he offered happily, leading me to a candy floss stool.
"Yes please," I told him, he grinned and turned to the vendor to order two candy flosses. I waited a few yards away for him.
I'd been walking around the fair with him for an hour and realised that Marcus hadn't changed at all; he was still the demanding and domineering boy I once admired when we were kids. He was taller now- about a foot taller than I was and he had more muscles and he still had those childish, irresistable brown eyes and his hair was still messy and curly.
"So, Kaykay..." he returned a few minutes later and handed me a stick of candy floss, which I thanked him for. "Where are you going next year?"
"I got accepted in NYU, what about you?"
He grinned, "Harvard, what are you studying?"
"English Literature," I answered, "And I'm guessing you're doing law?"
He made a face, "Yeah..." he replied, taking some candy floss. He didn't look too happy about his answer. His father was one of the best defense lawyers in the county so it wasn't a shock to know that Marcus got in Harvard, not to mention he was also our class Valedictorian.
"You don't sound too happy about it," I told him,
He shook his head, "I had no choice, this was planned out for me since the day I learned how to speak,"
"What did you want to do?"
He shrugged "I want to be a musician," he said, shyly.
Marcus could play guitar and he had an amazing voice, he always performed in school every time there was some sort of talent show.
"You know, we all have choices. We often say we don't have a choice when we don't want to disappoint other people. You have to follow you heart, Marcus 'cause your heart knows what makes you happy, I'm sure your father will understand if you talk to him, after all he's a lawyer."
He started to walk again. I followed close behind, but not on his side. I didn't want people from school to see that we were in the fair together. "Why are you walking behind me?" he asked, he stopped walking and looked at me.
"People might see us together and start to talk," I replied, he looked amused. He then looked around and smirked.
"What? Are you too embarrass to be seen with me?"
I glared at him, "No, I thought that's what you want..."
He sighed, "Kaykay, we're no longer in high school,"
"So why do you hide every time you see someone from school?"
He chuckled, "Because I don't want to talk to them." he answered, I looked at him suspiciously. Being the popular guy in school, I thought he would be happy to see people who worshipped the ground he walked on. It seemed that I was wrong.
He started to walk again and I walked alongside him. His smile widened when he saw a shooting booth, he walked towards it like a child. Turning to me, he promised to win me a teddy bear. I found it unneccessary but it was too late for me to say that he didn't have to. He already paid the man some coins and he looked excited as the fair man handed him a toy gun. To win, he had to knock out all six cans on the counter but on his first try, he only knocked out three. He paid the man again and tried for the second round, he failed again. The third time, he looked even more determined and he finally knocked out all six cans.
I cheered for him. The man in charge of the booth only laughed at us and asked Marcus to choose his prize. He picked a cute teddy bear holding a red heart with 'I LOVE YOU' written on it. He gave it to me, blushing and I teased him for it.
"Wow, no one has done this for me before," I told him,
He smiled a cute smile, "You've never had a boyfriend before?"
I shook my head, "No, I was too busy with school and I'm scared of getting my heart broken; I've seen it happened to the girls in school- mostly because of you; it looks really painful." Hugging the bear he gave me, I smiled at him. "I bet you've done this a lot of times with your girlfriends,"
He shook his head too, "Nope, just for you."
"Aw, that's nice..." I looked at him admiringly. I felt my cheeks beginning to burn.
"Now, let's go on the rides!" he said, happily changing the mood.
I tried not to giggle; he was hyper and it made him look even more attractive. "OK, calm down Marcus!"
"Let's go on the ferris wheel," he suggested, I stopped walking and I felt the blood on my face drained.
I was scared of heights, and the ferris wheel we were standing in front of, was the classic type. You know, like from the movie called The Notebook. It was open, with just a single bar to hold on to and it looked slightly unbalance.
My fear of heights started because of Marcus, it was him who dared me to go up the roof ten years ago; I had lost my balance and fell. I was too young to know right from wrong and I was such a fan of Marcus back then that I did whatever he told me to do.
He noticed my uneasiness; his smile faded when he saw my pale face. "Hey, what's wrong?"
"I hate heights," I told him,
Sighing, "Don't worry, you won't fall. It's perfectly safe," he assured me, holding my hand and pulling me towards the line.
I glared at him, "That's what you told me ten years ago!"
"Kaykay, that was ten years ago. I've said sorry like a million times! I even wrote you a poem about how sorry I was because your mom didn't want me to see you!"
"No you didn't! I never got that poem!"
"Please? I promise to hold your hand and it's really important for me that you go with me,"
"Why?" I asked, suspiciously
"I want to show you something," he said,
It didn't convince me but he tried even more ways to convince me. He made me feel guilty, he offered to do things for me; he said everything that could possibly persuade me to join him in the ride and at the end I finally agreed. It was because he was pretty persuassive and that I felt sorry for him because he was beginning to find it hard to think of ways that would make me want to join him.
"Fine! But you promised to hold my hand!"
"Promise is a promise," he laid out his hand on his chest as a sign of his sincerity.
It was our turn. He held my hand and led me to the ferris wheel's carriage. He whispered comforting words to me as the carriage started to move upwards and I was trying not to scream. I was still holding his hands and squeezing it so hard; he almost begged me to let go.
I felt the cool hair brushing my face; it felt so good but my nervousness still wouldn't go away. I was shaking but Marcus still kept whispering comforting words to me. I yelled out a shrieked when I felt the wheel stopped with our carriage right on top.
"OH GOD! WHAT'S HAPPENING?" I asked, panicked.
I heard him chuckle, "Kaykay, open your eyes you gotta see this view! Face your fears, don't worry I won't let you fall," he whispered, and slowly I opened my eyes and gasped. I could see the glittering lake and the roofs of the houses, the bird's eye view of the town. I felt so tall for once in my life. I was speechless, and with him holding my hand I felt that I finally overcame my fear. The view was too beautiful to worry about falling. I felt safe with him holding my hand.
"Wow! It's so beautiful," I was no longer scared.
"Yeah, beautiful..." he agreed.
I was looking at the view with amazement so when I turned to him to thank him for giving me the opportunity, it was when I realised that he was looking at my face and he was smiling.
"What?" I suddenly felt concious, I touched my face.
He only smiled and took my hand away from my face, "'I'm sorry for letting you fall, for not catching you at all. Please don't be sad, because it makes me feel bad. I love you Kaykay and I don't wanna see you cry,' that's the poem I wrote that I never sent you, I still know it by heart because it's the shittiest poem I've ever written," he chuckled, and I laughed tearfully.
I gave him a hug, "That was really sweet, thank you,"
"So... heights huh? I always thought you were fearless," he teased, changing the subject again.
"Yeah but I'm not so scared anymore, what's your greatest fear?" I asked.
He paused for a while and thought deeply and then he smiled and looked at me, "Being rejected by the girl I really like,"
I made a face at him, "Oh come on! You're the most popular guy in high school, you can get any girl you want,"
"I've been in love with this girl since we were eight, she told me she's scared of falling in love and I'm scared that I'd break her heart," he told me and I suddenly felt my heart tightened, like it was going to break. He was in love with a girl for ten years? I felt jealous, whoever the girl was she was lucky to have Marcus to love her. I mean, I only got to know Marcus again after ten years and I was already falling for him again, he was charming, sweet, funny and smart and any girl would be lucky to have him.
"Does she know how you feel?"
"Not yet,"
"You have to tell her, who knows? She might feel the same way and probably been waiting for you for ten years too,"
"You think so?"
"Yeah, so where is she now?" I had to ask.
He smiled again. Oh God, that smile. He squeezed my hand and moved closer, "She's right here with me," he whispered and leaned in closer to kiss me. It was my first kiss, it was perfect and I swear I could hear the fireworks went off and I felt myself melting.
"Yup, and she's been waiting for you for ten years," I whispered and he laughed.
Marcus helped me got over my fear and I owed him a lot for that. Funny how he was the one who started that fear in me and also the one who made it all stopped? I wasn't scared to fall anymore because I knew Marcus would be there to catch me. He was my first love and I was his. Simple as that.
We spent the remaining summer together; the fair was only in town for a week but we were there every day, we rode on the ferris wheel more than ten times. My mother wasn't happy about us when she found out but there wasn't much she could do about it; it seemed that she hadn't forgotten about what happened ten years ago but she eventually forgave Marcus when she saw how sincere he was with me. Marcus found the courage to tell his father that he didn't want to do Law; he applied in NYU too so we could be together.
It was on that fateful sunny Friday afternoon. It wasn't just an ordinary day but the most unforgettable day of my life.
/Note/ OK!
This idea has been in my head for ages... probably since May but I never got around to writing it. This is based on my personal experience, I got the idea when my friends and I went to the Funfair in our local park last May. I enjoyed it and I went on a scary ride with my crush, Mark. (Lol, Marcus) Just the two of us but he never held my hand! So anyway, I was there on that ride screaming my head off but at the same time, thinking about writing about two people facing their fears, with the boy finally confessing his love for the girl on a Ferris Wheel(blah blah blah). Then I was listening to 'My Boo' by Usher and Alicia Keys as I wrote this story and I love that song so I decided that the characters should be childhood friends and all.
This is an important story for me. This is like the closure of my feelings for Mark.
I'd like to thank Mark. He's such a big inspiration to all my stories; he has a girlfriend and I have a boyfriend (who I don't understand and doesn't give me much inspiration at all). I think Mark's always going to be 'My Boo'- you know that line "There's always that one person that will always have your heart" yup, that's Mark for me.
Also, excuse the grammar mistakes too; I wrote this at three o'clock in the morning. :D
Anyways, enough about Mark. Tell me about your situations, I'd like to know and maybe I can write something up base on those. =P
:)) Thanks in advance for the reviews. xOx