Naughty Food

"Order up!" I called, sliding the plate up into the window where a waitress pulled it from my hands and walked towards the sitting area. Once again, Maria, the only slutty waitress was wearing heels, had hiked up her jean skirt, and was chewing her gum loudly. Honestly, she was going to get raped by some serial killer that blew through this small town, and I was going to laugh. Okay, that was a bit harsh, but I had to admit, she made women like me wish she would just go and die. Us working women had better things to do than flirt for a little extra tip money.

"April, wake up!" Marcus, my brother, growled from the grill. Jumping back to life, I flipped my objects in pans, watching the oil sizzle and everything cook easily.

"Hey, April, can you go back and get me some lettuce" Marcus called, switching places with me. Nodding, I jogged across the concrete floor of the restaurants kitchen to the back. Honestly, I didn't know what to expect, but it definitely was not seeing my boss making out with his wife on a box of Mayonnaise, frisking her in front of the pears.

"Gross! Bob!" I whined, grabbing a head of lettuce. Jumping off his wife, he blushed and looked away.

Honestly, this was one of the 'best' restaurants in the one horse town that I lived in, and yet our boss was making me want to throw away the 6 large tubs of Mayonnaise and the 7 jaws of pairs. This was such a Dirty town.

"April, where's that Lettuce"

"Don't get your thong in a twist, I've got it" I sneered at my brother who rolled his eyes and began to wash and peel off the useless leaves. I went back to flipping onions and stuffing them onto burgers, then grilling cheese sandwitches and flipping fries. It was lunch and we made everything simple.

"Bob and Jane were making out in the storage closet" I grumbled as Marcus sputtered with laughter, putting the plate up.

"Order up!... Really?" He asked, grabbing another ticket and going with it.

"Yea," I laughed over the sound of sizzling grilled cheese, "That's just gross"

"April, they're 30, married, and just back from a long vacation, they're sex drive is probably high"

"Please don't talk about our bosses sex drive!" I put up plates and the sides, putting up another burger with fries, and a small cup of coleslaw. "Order up!"

"April, come on, you know that if you actually took a day off and wore what Maria wears, you could use your sex drive" Marcus called over the sizzling of a chicken cordon-bleu.

"What makes you think I want to discuss my sex drive with you either! Just leave it" I laughed, making another grilled cheese.

"Because I'm your homosexual twin brother and I think you need to be laid! Honestly, your house is too silent for me! And I live in it!" Marcus cackled, pulling the chicken off the grill and fixing it up on a bun.

"My twin brother needs to leave my sex drive, sex life, and me alone and stop making fun of my peaceful house!" I shot him a laughing, but warning, look. He shrugged and went back to wait he was doing.

"I was just sayin'"

"And besides, what man in this one horse town would want me?" I mocked, "I'm mean, sarcastic, I'm not even girly."

"A very adventurous, strong stomached, man" Shaking my head, I went back to making lunch for the trucker men, the overly pregnant ladies with already 2 kids that were screaming, and business men who sat with their partners debating over some stupid rule or trial. That's when it happened. Maria was called over by one of these business men for his plate of something or other and both Marcus and I watched her come strutting back into the kitchen and handing over.

"Guy at table 8 wants to know if you two idiots know what a medium rare burger with home fries looks like" Maria rolled her eyes, "He's an ass, he slapped mine" I snatched the plate from Maria and poked the burger.

"This is medium rare, what is he talking about and he never ordered home fries!" I pulled his ticket where it just said fries.

"Refire" Marcus called, taking it and making another, setting aside another persons lunch to refire another burger. Scowling to myself, I cut up some potatoes in homefries style, frying them up, adding salt and pepper and putting them on the plate with the second burger. However, as the man ate it, he spat it out and yelled at Maria. Maria turned and looked to me, I pursed my lips and stormed out, dodging Marcus's arms and storming to the table.

"can I help you?" I asked, wiping my hands on the apron on my hips before crossing my arms.

"This is not Medium rare, this is well done!" The man growled. I grabbed his fork and cut the burger in half and pointed at the middle that was the perfect shade of brownish pink, the same color of Medium rare.

"Did you go to cooking school?" I asked. He scowled, "I didn't think so, if you have a problem with our burgies, get up and leave!" With that, I turned and stormed back to the kitchen.

"APRIL! That was the food critic"

"So what?"



"HEY!" They all turned to a suited man in the door way with a giant smirk on his face. Honestly, who does he think he is? "Actually, that was my brother who gets a kick out of messing with chefs, you're the first person to actually yell at him. I'm, the food critic" I quirked a brow.

"My name is-" I cut him off as I turned around to continue cooking. The man let his voice trail off as Marcus and I cooked. I have better things to worry about than some silly city food critic talking about how his brother is an ass.

"Sorry, she's really serious about her job"

"I can tell,"