8A loud sound resonated throughout the quiet library, its tables filled with numerous students working diligently. All eyes immediately turned to the brunette who was gathering up her textbooks and notes, while fingering the large rip that had just made all her belongings spill out of her backpack.
Jenna sighed, and pushed a lock of hair out of her eyes. Clearly, she should have listened to her dad when he had insisted she purchase a new backpack. And of all places for her bag to rip, it had to be in the library. Not outside on campus, or in her secure dorm room. No, it had to happen in a place where a well-functioning human ear could discern every single noise made. What was worse than having everyone's eyes upon her, though, was having a particular person's attention turned toward her in her humiliating moment.
A boy with tussled dark brown hair and hazel eyes was walking toward her, amidst the whispers that had erupted after her moment of glory. He handed her a few of the items that had fallen out, including, with a horrified Jenna looking on, a box of tampons. Of course. As if the day could not get any worse.
"That looks like a pretty big gash," he commented, a half-smile appearing on his face. "You should get a new backpack. Or one of those shoulder purse things that girls usually have."
"I should," admitted Jenna. "My dad kept telling me to buy a new and better backpack, but I never really got around to doing that. And I hate using those shoulder bags."
"Oh." His smiled disappeared. "Sorry."
"No, no, I didn't mean to insult you! I'm not upset!" Jenna waved her arms around in despair. "I just feel passionately about some things."
"Don't worry, I'm not insulted." He glanced over at the clock hanging against the wall. "Hey, I'd better go. I have to go back to work." He nodded toward the circulation desk.
Jenna nodded. "Sure. Um, thanks for helping me pick up my stuff."
He grinned. "No problem. Well, bye."
She nodded and watched him walk back to the desk. He was at the desk every day, during her free two hours in the afternoon. She made a habit of going to the library at the exact same time every day, so that she would be able to see him and, perhaps, one day, at least learn his name. Today, she had been close. It was the first time she had ever spoken with him.
Jenna did not consider herself a stalker. It was not as though she spent her whole time gawking at the boy at the desk, who she had aptly dubbed "Library Boy". After all, she did spend most of her time doing her homework. But whenever she needed a break, her eyes would glance up and linger over toward him. He was usually reading a book, which made her drawn to him even more. What boy, after all, read for pleasure? She was sure that the boys she knew would prefer to play online games instead. But this boy was different—and she really wanted to know his name. That was the first step, anyway. What she really hoped was that Library Boy would be "her type"…then maybe he could become the real boyfriend that she longed to have. Not her Prince Charming, per say, but someone who just got her. She wanted, well, a "Wes", from Sarah Dessen's The Truth About Forever. Now there was a perfect boy. Gorgeous, smart, and most of all, he believed that flaws, the kinks and crinkles that blemished a person's overall persona, were to be embraced—they were possibilities, not hindrances. Now, if only Wes could jump out of the pages of the book and save her from the mournful state of her love life.
Well. Jenna stopped thinking about such depressing matters. She had too many things to add to her to-do list. She had to acquire a bag of some sort to carry her books—not to mention complete the piling list of assignments that her professors were not hesitant to assign. She also had to find a job on campus as well…Jenna shook her head, feeling the sudden urge to pull her hair and yell loudly. Perhaps she would save that whim for another day though. She had embarrassed herself quite enough today as it was. Exhaling, she took up her books and slid into an unoccupied seat, and began to work, careful not to look up at Library Boy.
"I think you missed a perfectly good opportunity to introduce yourself," said Natalie, grimacing at her pasta. "Why are we paying so much money for this?" She gestured toward her dish with a fork.
Jenna shook her head. "If I introduced myself yesterday, do you know how awkward that would be? I already made a huge commotion in the library, so now everyone knows about the loser girl whose backpack ripped. Plus he was holding my tampons. I would not have been able to hold a normal conversation with him after that."
"I guess the tampon thing was pretty bad," admitted Natalie. "Well, you'll just have to stick it out and he'll talk eventually. I know you don't want to make the first move."
Well, obviously. Jenna did not hold fond memories of initiating a relationship. She remembered, cringing, how she had asked her high school boyfriend, Steven, to the movies. That had not been her smoothest moment. Goodness, why did she not have the ability to naturally flirt with guys? She saw numerous girls at college do it with very little effort, but when she attempted to put on a seductive act, she would always feel uncomfortable. She sighed. Why did relationships have to be so complicated? She wished she could just go up to Library Boy and ask him out. Except perhaps that would be too straightforward. After all, he may end up being a total douche bag, and then she would be the fool.
"I'm going to get something edible," announced Natalie, shaking Jenna out of her reverie. "Do you want anything?"
"I'll come," she said, and they both stood up and walked toward the area of the dining hall where the food was served. She glanced over at her friend and smiled. At least she had a tight network of friends for support. Natalie was, perhaps, her closest friend. They had met during orientation week of freshman year, and were initially suspicious of each other. Jenna had thought Natalie was one of those wild party girls, while Natalie saw Jenna as a quiet, cold loner. However, they eventually hit it off, and Jenna was thankful that she had been able to look beyond her preliminary judgments of Natalie.
Her friend was currently piling fries onto a plate. "This is not very healthy," she stated. "But I don't care. I need edible nourishment for dance practice tonight"
"Maybe I'll just get some fruit," said Jenna thoughtfully, reaching out for an apple that was nestled inside a basket while her gaze was elsewhere. Suddenly, she felt her hand grasping another set of fingers, and she whipped her head around and saw her hands intertwined with those of Library Boy.
"Oh, sorry," she squeaked, and drew her hand away from his. "I—uh—thought I was getting an apple."
"No worries." Library Boy's eyes were twinkling, most likely from amusement at the current situation. "I thought the same thing as well." He looked down at the basket, which still held the Granny Smith apple that they had both been reaching for, and looked back at her. "You take the apple."
"Oh, no, you can have it," Jenna insisted. "I'm not that hungry."
"Neither am I."
"Well—I'm sure you're hungrier than me."
Library Boy raised an eyebrow. "Are you calling me a pig?"
Jenna could not believe this discussion she was having with him. They were exchanging playful banter, and she hardly knew him. Was she flirting? Her stomach grumbled, the sound oddly resembling a person running their thumb over the piano keys, from the highest tone to the lowest tone. Library Boy chuckled, and handed her the apple.
"I believe you do need this more than I do."
Jenna took it and pursed her lips into a slight smile. "Thank you."
"You're welcome. By the way, the name's Ethan." His eyes were twinkling. "I see you at the library all the time. It's nice to finally have a normal conversation with you."
"I'm Jenna. We—um—haven't met in the best circumstances, though." She hoped her face was not too red. Her pale skin had an unfortunate tendency to flush when she felt the slightest discomfort. And at that moment, she was officially meeting the boy that had captivated her since the middle of last year, as a freshman. She would not be surprised if her face was crimson.
Ethan ran a hand through his waves of brown hair, and mumbled, "Hey, look, I got to go. But…will I see you at the library?"
Jenna nodded, her stomach feeling full even without food. He definitely thought she was a stalker. She was at the library at the same time he worked at the circulation desk. Wonderful. After he left, she turned to Natalie, who was standing near the dessert trays, grinning.
"That was awkward," she commented, "but at least you know his name now."
"And he thinks I'm a stalker," Jenna pointed out glumly. "I should go to another library and study."
"Oh, please. You love going to Stirling. Don't change your habits for him. He's just a guy. You are an independent woman."
Jenna laughed. Natalie's statement reminded her of her friend from high school, Riley. Although the both of them were hopeless romantics, Riley did not participate in the boyfriend search that set many girls into a frenzy. She preferred to dedicate herself to her studies, as an economics major in a college about two hours away from where Jenna was studying. She often bemoaned to Jenna the state of college boys at her school.
"They're too immature," she sniffed, while they were hanging out during their summer break. "It's either sports or video games…or hooking up with random girls. Or they prefer partying and getting drunk. Seriously, do any of them like to read? Or do anything intelligent?"
"You go to one of the top universities in the country," Jenna explained. "Most guys there are probably intelligent. They just—don't do the most sensible things at times."
"Whatever." Riley sighed. "I'll wait 'till I get a job, and then we'll see. Right now, I'm single and enjoying it. No drama and a lot of freedom."
Riley seemed like one of those "Miss Independent" types, but Jenna knew that her friend wanted to marry and raise a family some day. After all, they would sigh happily after every romantic comedy they watched, and discussed, in great detail, their favorite male characters in books. Riley just, well, she just didn't want to admit to being such a softy, Jenna supposed. Not that Jenna openly declared to the world that she wanted a boyfriend, but…she couldn't lie to herself and say that she was perfectly satisfied with the single life.
"Hey, we have class." Natalie nudged her, and then handed her a paper plate topped with a piece of cake. "Here, have this. We need all the nourishment we can get for that dreaded math class."
Jenna nodded, and went back with Natalie to grab her backpack and drop her tray off. Before she left the dining hall, though, she gave the room a quick once-over, wondering if Ethan was still there, despite the fact that he said he had to leave. But he was nowhere in sight.
She was in the library again, and it was Friday. Of course, she was just enough of a nerd to be studying on a Friday, but she really did need to complete a good amount of homework. However, this time, she was free to scream her head off or drop all her books, for there was almost no one in the library, besides the security desk near the entrance. But the balding man who was sitting there, nodding off, hardly looked like someone who cared about anything else except getting in a good nap during his shift. Of course, Jenna hardly had the desire to go crazy. She just needed to get some work done, and perhaps, later on, visit one of her friend's rooms for some gossip.
Her Economics homework was still right in front of her, mocking her, for she could not for her life figure out how to do her problem set. She breathed out slowly, staring at the variables and numbers that jumbled energetically around in her brain, but formed no coherent pattern. Why had she taken Economics 101? Well, because Riley had suggested it as a "practical" class to take in college, but she was not prepared for the multitude of math calculations involved—and she disliked working with numbers.
She froze in her seat, though, when she heard a small creak. Her heart began beating erratically, and she closed her eyes, hoping that the sound was only in her mind. But no, there were footsteps, albeit very soft ones. They did seem to get closer to her…Jenna prepared to scream…
"Jenna?"
"Stop it, I have a gun!" she shrieked, turning around with her textbook held high above her head. "You—E-Ethan?"
Ethan began to laugh, his voice scratchy, sounding much older than his college years. "Do you really have a gun?"
"No." Jenna stiffened. "No one needs to know that though. Especially if it were a rapist who was coming to attack me just now."
"Mm, sorry. Just me." He grinned, his head tilted sideways. "Disappointed?"
Jenna stared at him. "Not particularly."
"You're funny. Hey—why are you here on a Friday night? Shouldn't you be out partying?"
"Um, no. I have a lot of homework to do." She gestured toward her problem set.
"Ah, Econ 100? Great class. I took it last year."
"Oh, really? I don't like it very much. Econ isn't my thing."
"Well, it's your lucky day, Jenna." Ethan ran a hand through his hair, more unruly than usual, and smirked, obviously pleased that he knew something that she didn't. "I'm an Econ major, actually. So I can help you if you like."
"Oh, really? That'd be great! Except—uh—oh, I don't want to trouble you. You probably have a lot of things going on right now." She waved her right hand back and forth, and then mentally cursed herself for doing so. People always sniggered whenever they saw her perform her characteristic hand gestures while she spoke. Now she was, yet again, preparing herself for ultimate embarrassment.
"Nope." Ethan shrugged. "I'm saving the crazy partying for tomorrow."
Jenna wasn't sure if he was serious about the partying, but decided not to ponder further. He was probably joking. He didn't seem like the frat-boy type who partied hard. Frat boys, she decided, did not help her pick up her belongings and offer her the last apple in the dining hall. No, they were rude and selfish. And they didn't treat girls with respect. They used girls to satisfy their temporary desires, and then dumped them. No, Ethan was not one of those boys. He was above them.
"Here, I'll help you," he stated firmly. "What are you learning now? Supply and demand?"
"Ugh, no. We're doing expected value and all this complicated probability business. I really don't understand it. I've never been fond of math."
"Ah, don't worry. The professor always makes everything harder than it actually is. Here, I'll show you a shortcut that I learned last year from my TA. It might make you understand this information better."
He took a pencil and began scribbling some variables, while speaking in a soothing tone that compelled Jenna to desire a nap. His voice was scratchy, yet gentle—a mix between the bad boy and the boy-next-door. A strange and oxymoronic combination, and yet it suited him. Her mind was drifting, so she forced herself to listen to his words. After all, she did want to pass the class. So she focused, and a door miraculously opened, untangling the intricacies of expected utility, uncertainty, risk, and insurance. It was as though the pieces of a complex jigsaw puzzle were coming together to form a complete, coherent image. Ethan, she decided, as she looked into his golden-green eyes, was a miracle-worker. And perhaps the guy that she had been patiently waiting for, ever since she saw 10 Things I Hate About You and melted when Pat had given Kat a guitar as a "I'm sorry" gift.
Then he smiled and murmured, "Does that make sense? Sorry, I'm not very good at explaining concepts sometimes."
"No." Jenna shook her head and. "That was perfect."
"So he's pretty much the guy you've been waiting for your entire life," stated Natalie, running a hand through her blond hair. "Wow. I'm impressed by this progress you've been making with him. You didn't even know his name last week."
"I don't know…we're not even friends," said Jenna, straightening her sapphire-blue skirt. "What if he already has a girlfriend?"
"Oh, I didn't think of that," admitted Natalie. "Well, we'll just have to snoop around and see if he does have one. Seriously, though, you can't just let this guy slip through your fingers. He could be the One."
Jenna snorted. "I thought you didn't believe in the One."
"Well, maybe not for me. But there's something about him that makes him right for you. I have a good feeling about this. Even Riley said so, right?"
Riley did seem enthusiastic when Jenna relayed to her all that had happened between she and Ethan. Then again, Riley usually reveled in all stories Jenna had to tell about guys. "I have to live vicariously through you," she'd said one time. "I have a loveless life, so I must know about your escapades. That way, I'll be able to satisfy my needs for romance."
Jenna would hardly call her experience with guys as "escapades", but Riley had always been a bit dramatic and exaggerative with her words.
She looked down at her outfit. A sapphire blue skirt and a black tank top, with sparkling gold flats. She thought she looked all right. Maybe she wasn't gorgeous, but she thought she could pass for pretty.
When she and Natalie reached their destination, one of the other buildings where undergraduate students resided, Natalie scanned her student card and opened the door. They walked up a flight of stairs and came upon the second floor. After finding room 225, Natalie pushed open the door and both girls found themselves in the middle of a rather rambunctious event. Students were milling about with infamous red cups in their hands, and a tall boy on one end was chugging down a bottle of Absolut Vodka. Before they could even begin to communicate to each other about why they were at such a function, their friend Stephanie, who had invited them, ran over to them and engulfed them in a bear hug.
"Hey Jenna, Natalie! It's great to see you." She smiled widely, her lips bright red. "Sorry this isn't your usual thing, but the girls promised that it would be a blast. A lot of people are coming, so you'll probably see tons of people you know."
Stephanie was a member of one of the three sororities on campus, but she didn't drink. She did, however, love her sorority and the other girls in it. Jenna wasn't sure how that all worked, but did not try to analyze further. Some things were better left untouched.
"Is Ethan coming?" asked Natalie, quite suddenly. Jenna glared at her, but the blonde took no notice.
Stephanie frowned. "Um, Ethan? Kind of tall, dark hair?"
"I guess."
"Yeah, I think so. He's in one of the frats, and most of those guys are coming tonight."
"He's in a frat?" Natalie gaped. "Seriously? He seemed really sweet when Jenna and I met him."
"Well, not all frat guys are jerks," defended Stephanie. "Just—they get kind of wild whenever alcohol is in their systems. Some of them are really sweet!"
Natalie shrugged her comment off, and embarked on a new topic. While the two of them were talking about classes, Jenna was off in her own world, pondering on the conversation that had just occurred. Was Ethan really in a frat? She did not like to stereotype, but she was not fond of boys who were in frats. They were just so—exclusive. And usually preferred "hot" girls—girls who were skinny and lacked chests, or girls who had "perfect" curves. Jenna was curvy, but not in a way that would attract those boys. Perhaps, though, Stephanie was thinking of another Ethan. It was not a completely unusual name. Although the only other times she had heard the name Ethan was the furniture store, Ethan Allen, and that American Revolution hero.
Even if Ethan were in a frat, though, she would not judge him. No, she was an open and liberal-minded person. Stereotyping was a narrow-minded activity. She repeated this information in her head like a mantra.
"Hey, Jenna!"
She looked up, feeling her heart jolt against her chest, and saw a familiar dark-haired boy waving at her. She smiled hesitantly, as he nearly crashed into her, the drink that he held in his hand nearly sloshing out of the cup.
"Didn't know you'd be here tonight." He took a swig out of the cup. "Hope you found me helpful last night."
"Oh, yes, thank you again," said Jenna sincerely. "I appreciate your help so much. You definitely made more sense than my professor."
"Well, thank you." A faint tint of red spotted his cheeks. "I was thinking of becoming a professor later on, actually. But not for certain, of course."
"I think you'd be great as a professor. Really."
"Aw, you're too sweet." He grinned. "Hey, want me to get you a drink?"
Jenna eyed the cup in his hand warily. "Like a Coke?"
Ethan's upwardly curved mouth sloped down slightly. "Um, sure. Maybe. If there is soda lying around. Maybe you want a beer instead? I think there's Bud Light, in case you're one of those girls who doesn't want to get fat."
Jenna pursed her lips together. Oh, dear. So he was a drinker. Well, that was all right. Drinking was a common activity in college. She had nothing against people who drank. Her parents drank, and she loved them just the same. Then again, they were still underage, but who cared? They were going to be twenty-one in two years. Should she accept the beer then and not seem like a total straightedge? But no. She hated beer. It tasted like cherry cough syrup, except ten times worse. She eyed the tall, bright red cup in Ethan's hands and shook her head.
"I don't like beer," she stated flatly. She was not going to let herself go and engage in activities that betrayed her true character, just for a boy. She enjoyed being in control. She didn't need alcohol to have fun.
"Oh." Ethan shrugged and turned around, his eyes surveying the room. "Uh. I think there's wine too. Oh, and my roommate Ben brought vodka over too. Want any of that?"
"Let me rephrase: I don't drink." Even Jenna herself was surprised at her boldness. Her heart was pumping blood rapidly; for once, she did not simply stand and smile while others rambled on about the drama in their lives and convinced her to sign up for activities that she held little interest for, just so they would have a buddy. No, she was in control tonight. And Ethan was also grating on her nerves as well. Why could he not leave her alone? Yes, she admitted she was a bit of a prude, but what of it? In An Old Fashioned Girl, Polly Milton was a prude in her times, and she still got the guy.
"You don't drink?" repeated Ethan. Then he smiled. "Hey, I respect that. Not everyone has that much self-control, you know. It's good that you don't let off steam in such an unhealthy way like so many college students."
Jenna blinked. She certainly did not expect such an accepting attitude. Perhaps she had been too harsh upon his character. Yes, there she was again, judging and stereotyping. Ethan was a nice guy after all, just like she had thought. She accepted a Coke when he brandished a can from one of the side tables.
"So what're you majoring in?" Ethan queried, his eyes brightening even through the dimming light of the dorm room.
"Not sure yet," sighed Jenna. "It's been so stressful, trying to decide. I'll probably do something in the humanities or social sciences, but there are so many choices. I envy you for knowing what your major is. My friend Riley is also majoring in Econ too."
"Oh?" He set his cup aside and slid his hands into his jean pockets. "Really? Does she go here?"
"Oh, no, she goes to Princeton. We were really close friends in high school, and we still keep in touch." Jenna's mouth turned upward. "We have this long message thread on Facebook, which we've been adding on to since April. We want to see how long we can sustain it for. But really, we talk about everything, especially books, because we're dorks like that."
Ethan laughed. "Well, here and Princeton are places where you can be a dork and still be cool."
"True."
They continued to chat—not small talk, either. Ethan, a born and bred Ohio native, loved sports—Jenna decided to mention her lack of coordination in any physical activity involving an object, such as a ball—especially soccer and track. He had a sister who was a junior in high school, and his parents were both workaholics; his mom was a corporate lawyer, and his dad was a manager for a small hedge fund in Cincinnati. He admitted that he was bound for business at birth, since his parents were both heavily involved in the world of investment banks, stocks, and dealing with enormous sums of money on a daily basis. But he loved it; he understood more clearly how the world worked.
As he spoke, Jenna felt herself physically drawn to this boy. The way he spoke—he even made slightly ridiculous gestures like she did when he became overly excited or emotional—only compelled her to want more, to hear more of his voice. He was just so passionate, and made something as boring and meaningless as economics sound as mesmerizing as the world of Harry Potter.
She, in turn, revealed pieces of herself to him. Her home was ten minutes away from campus, but she lived on-campus in the dorms, deciding that she wanted the true college experience. She loved doing community service, and was especially interested in helping those inflicted with AIDS—perhaps she would be able to travel to Africa one day, and make a difference? Or perhaps join the Peace Corps or Teach for America after college. She still, however, loved the little things in life. She enjoyed talking about books with Riley and discussing them in great detail—especially the male characters, but this, she did not disclose to him. At school, though, she loved to hang out with Natalie and her other friends—just talking about classes, the latest events on campus, and life in general. She did not like to party and become someone she was not, but he respected her because she was different from many of the other girls he knew. They poured out a plethora of information—but Jenna trusted him. She was not afraid. He would take care of the parts of herself that she had given to him.
"Hey, Ethan!" A loud voice jolted the both of them from their silence.
Ethan looked over and saw a blond boy waving to him, while stumbling over empty cans. He chuckled and turned back to Jenna with an apologetic smile. "Sorry. My duty as a roommate and friend calls. Ben's totally trashed. I'll be back."
Jenna nodded, and he dashed over to his friend, draping one of Ben's arms around his neck. She felt a tap on her shoulder and turned to find Natalie and Stephanie smiling brightly.
"So," said Stephanie slowly, "it looks like you and Ethan are getting along just fine."
Jenna narrowed her eyes. "Yes. I don't like that look of yours right now, Steph."
Her friend shrugged. "Whatever. Hey, so we need to have a girls' movie night next week. British period dramas. And modern chick flicks. And lots of fattening junk food." She sighed wistfully. "God, I can't wait to see Richard Armitrage in North and South again."
Jenna and Natalie both burst into giggles, and the three of them began discussing their plans for the next weekend. Jenna was so wrapped up in catching up with her friends that she had almost forgotten about her heart-to-heart with Ethan. Almost.
She could not believe it. After about half an hour, Ethan was trashed and trying to get her to dance with him.
"Ethan." Jenna tried to shrug his tight grip on her arm. "Please. You're drunk. I can't do this."
He released an exceptionally slow sigh. "Fine. I'll just go entertain myself somewhere else."
With that, he grabbed a slim girl with long, shiny brown hair and skimpy jean shorts, and proceeded to make out with her.
Jenna's heart was thudding like a basketball being dribbled on the court. No, there was no need for her to be upset. Ethan was free to kiss whomever he wanted. They were not going out. He wasn't even a friend. She didn't even have the right to be concerned. But…
Did they not just tell each other about their lives? And hopes for the future? Deep topics; subjects that college students usually avoided. However, she felt as though they were two strangers who exchanged their souls to each other on the street, and then left, without exchanging contact information, never meeting again.
But she did not understand why she was feeling so low, so hurt. So what? He was not Wes, not Richard Armitrage—not a fictional character that epitomized what she, and many other girls, looked for in a guy. He was a college guy, still somewhat immature, yet confusing. First he was sweet, and now—he was hooking up with random girls. Or perhaps she was not random. Perhaps she was his girlfriend. Oh, dear. She should have realized that attractive guys like Ethan did not usually stay single.
Jenna's head was beginning to ache. The room suddenly felt like summer in Louisiana. Moisture developed as beads of sweat on her forearms. A hand reached for her upper arm. It was Natalie, peering at her, a frown etched upon her usually sunny features.
"Jenna? Is everything all right?"
Jenna shook her head. "I think I want to leave now."
Natalie nodded, whispered a few vague words into Stephanie's ear, and then, hooking her arm with Jenna's, meandered slowly to the exit. Jenna was not sure whether or not Natalie saw Ethan, but her friend sensed that she was not her usual self at that point. Before the two girls left though, Jenna's head swiveled cautiously to the opposite direction. Ethan and the brunette were laughing together, her head thrown back and her body shaking with laughter, while he was nodding and smiling, not even sending Jenna a second glance. He had forgotten about her. Jenna nodded to herself. Like two strangers, never to see each other again.
Jenna really did not want to study at the library again. But it was midterm week, and the other libraries on campus were filled. Besides, she did love this library. She would not let a certain someone affect her studies. She would be cool and collected, an Independent Woman. She was at college to learn, not to languish over boys.
But the next class she had to review for was Econ. She had studied all her other classes, but had put off Econ, her hardest course. A small voice inside her brain would not allow her to ask Ethan to help her study. No. She was going to learn about supply-and-demand, and substitution effect versus income effect herself. Yes.
Goodness. Who was she trying to kid? She was going to fail the midterm, hands down. The only section she understood was the one that Ethan had carefully and patiently explained to her that Friday night. Maybe she had overreacted that night. He was drunk; he probably didn't know what he was doing when he kissed that girl. Then again, Jenna hardly condoned getting drunk and performing out-of-the-blue actions. Ethan seemed so nice, though…and sweet…thoughtful…attractive…goodness, she was already in too deep. She liked him. A lot. Despite the fact that he was more of a party animal than she would have preferred.
"Hey, Jenna?"
She looked up, startled. Ethan was standing in front of her, twisting his hands together and smiling slightly. "Oh, hi." Oh, dear. She sounded too cold. Now he would know that she was upset with him. She did not want him to know that he had such an effect on her.
He blurted, "I'm sorry. I was not being responsible at all last Friday. I was drunk out of my mind; I was not thinking. It was utterly rude of me to ditch you and then hook up with some random girl—I had no idea who she was, really. Don't be mad at me, Jenna."
Jenna smiled. This boy was just too much. Even though his apology had been hasty and ineloquent, it still made her heart feel rather warm. She was too nice to reject him. Screw all those magazines that urged girls to "play hard to get". She was fond of him, and he seemed sincere, with his wide eyes and the lilting sound of his voice.
"I'd like to be friends," she said firmly. Well, she was too attracted to him to consider him a friend, but she would take their relationship one step at a time.
Ethan nodded, a smile spreading across his lips. "Of course." He said no more, and Jenna felt awkward. Then again, the pair of them constantly found themselves in discomfited positions. Jenna really feared for what her next action would be, for surely she would, yet again, prove herself socially inept in some way. However, as her eyes flitted down to her review sheets, she knew that she needed to help herself, swallow her pride, and beg for aid. Plus, it would save both Ethan and her from attempting to avoid eye contact or fumbling for a subject to discuss.
"Hey, Ethan? Um, my Econ midterm is in a few days, and I was wondering if you could help me study? Not for too long. Just—I'm having trouble with some other topics."
"Of course." His eyes glittered under the basking glow of the afternoon sunlight. "What do you need help on?"
Jenna exhaled, trying to hide her blush when she replied, "Everything."
His chuckle that ensued reassured her that everything would be all right—perhaps even her impending midterm.
Two hours later, Jenna leaned back against her chair in exhaustion. No one had ever told her college would be this hard. Thankfully, though, Ethan had once again come to her rescue. She chuckled to herself. She made herself sound like a princess, with Ethan as the knight-in-shining-armor. Or Prince Charming. Goodness, her mind came up with such ridiculous thoughts at times.
Well, perhaps not. Ethan had been somewhat of a savior to her. He helped her study for her midterm. He helped her pick up her fallen items at the library. He gave her the last apple in the dining hall. He revealed himself to her in a way that very few people had in her lifetime. Jenna stifled a long, bemoaning sigh. Nope. She was certainly not over him.
"Well, how prepared do you feel now?" Ethan looked equally fatigued, and Jenna squirmed slightly in her seat, biting her lip. "What? What's wrong?"
"I took up so much of your time," she burst out. "You probably have so much to study for as well. If you do poorly on your exams, I'll be the reason! Oh, wait"—her eyes widened—"I mean, not that you're going to do poorly. I'm sure you'll ace everything. It's just—uh—" She trailed off, her words like rocks skimming the surface of the lake, moving a few consecutive steps before sinking slowly to the bottom.
Ethan rolled his eyes. "Jenna, you are way too nice. Seriously, it was a pleasure to help you. I love teaching, and reviewing this information with you helped me freshen up a bit on my knowledge as well. Don't worry; if anything, you did me a favor, too."
Jenna shook her head. "You are way too nice."
"Why, thank you." He grinned, a dimple appearing on his chin, just below his mouth. "Call me any time you want to study Econ. Or any subject. Or you can call me if you want to…hang out." He paused and sucked in a long, deep breath. "Um, listen, do you want to go out for dinner this weekend? After midterms?"
She looked at him. Really looked at him. A guy was asking her out. Not just any guy, but a cute, smart, and nice guy. And to top it all, she liked him as well. What more could she ask for?
Maybe, though, he just thought he would have some fun and mess with her. Maybe his friends thought it would be funny if he could try and score with the innocent good girl—a bet. Maybe he thought they would be going to dinner just as friends. Maybe he already had a girlfriend…and it was like a John Tucker Must Die situation in which he would be just stringing along a few poor, unsuspecting girls because he was a macho man…
Jenna nearly snorted at the thoughts racing through her mind. God, she watched too many chick flicks. The point was, she didn't know what kind of guy he was. Although he really didn't seem like the cheating, lying, irresponsible, and sloppy type. Perhaps, for once, she would stop overanalyzing the situation and just jump over the gap between two cliffs, in which falling meant dropping hundreds of feet down into a windy, furious river. Well, except in her case, finding out that Ethan was not the kind of guy for her did not mean certain death. Would it bode disappointment? Sadness? Anger at her naïveté? Yes. But she'd get over it.
She turned to Ethan and smiled. "I'd love to."
Ethan's face immediately lightened. His eyes crinkled, the dimple on his chin emerged, and his mouth was twisted into a sideways half-moon. His teeth, Jenna noticed, were very white. Just watching his facial features, though, compelled Jenna to reason that she had made the right decision. And when he tentatively covered her hand with his, amidst the flurry of papers and textbooks in an old, slightly smelly library where many students were frantically cramming for their tests, she was certain that he was worth a leap.
AN: Hello all. I have not posted here since high school…and now I'm in college…yeah. Anyway, I hope this story was enjoyable! Or somewhat entertaining. I'm not terribly pleased with it, but I wrote it for a friend, so hopefully she likes it as well :P Please review if you have any comments or suggestions.