Fish Fingers and Big Belly Burps

Ok, I write one recounted episode and now all of a sudden I feel the need to write another. There are plenty of stories in my life that I could reminisce about; I prefer the humorous, light-hearted ones. These days I like to look back on my life and think about the times I spent with my friends, when I was just a kid, without a care in the world. I haven't been a real kid in years. Some people say I act like one, or that's my real personality, but I tell you now I could be a lot worse. Not that being kidlike sometimes is a bad thing, it helps me in my job and I guess it adds to my personality and character, makes me more human.

It's funny; when I begin to rummage around in my memories and look back on my life I can only ever seem to find the most embarrassing events possible. For some reason I have a distinct memory of a time during primary school when I was leaving the school dinner hall after polishing off the largest packed lunch my mum has ever packed me. My belly was so full and satisfied that I don't think I could have even thought about going out side to run it off. As I was walking down the widest part of the corridor the dinner ladies were all stood having a chat. Being the polite little boy that I was back then I decided I was going to say hello. But when I opened my mouth to speak, instead of my sweet little innocent voice, there came a huge burp, loudest I've ever done. I don't even think I could top it even today. To make it worse the wide empty corridor echoed the disgusting sound. I'm surprised the teachers upstairs didn't hear it. So instead of saying a nice polite hello and get a nice polite hello back, I got fifteen minutes time out on the wall for a display of public rudeness and apparently being cheeky to staff.

I didn't get into trouble that much at school. I can only remember getting into trouble and going on the wall four times, but those are stories for another time.

Another embarrassing point in my life comes when I was just in year two, so I must have been around 6 or 7 years old. I was getting ready for school at home in the morning and listening to my mum and dad while they talked about what the day was going to hold. Now when I was at school the dinner time options were packed lunch, hot dinners, sandwiches or homes. I hardly even stayed hot dinners or sandwiches, but for some reason I had it in my head that hot dinners is what I was having today. My dad was taking me to school that day and I overheard my mum asking him if he had my money. This is where I got the idea that I was sating hot dinners. Happy, knowing it was fish fingers today and fish fingers where my favourite, I went to school.

When it came to registration time in class my teacher called out my name, horrified I realised that I didn't have my money on me and that I could possibly be missing out on lovely fish fingers for dinner, even more to the point I wasn't going to be eating at all! I was panicked. My teacher said my name again, I looked up and I did what any other six or seven year old child would do in a time of crisis, I cried. I explained through a fit of tears to my teacher how my dad had forgotten to give me my money and that I was supposed to be staying hot dinners. My teacher obviously felt sympathetic and he put me down for hot dinners. He told me that we can sort the payment when my parents come to pick me up. Relieved that I wasn't going to starve to death I sat down and got on happily with my work for that morning, or at least I think I did, I don't really remember those details.

When dinner time rolled around I lined up with the rest of my class mates to have my hot dinners, I could smell the intoxicating aroma of the gorgeous breaded fish fingers, coming through the dinner hall vents. Needless to say I was happy.

As I was sat down eating my fish fingers, I looked up towards the door of the dinner hall and I saw my teacher stood there with my dad. You see it turns out I wasn't supposed to be staying hot dinners at all; I was supposed to be going home and the reason my dad was there was to pick me up. The money my mum was talking about was for my school photo. My teacher explained to my dad that I was looking forward to my fish fingers. My dad paid for the school dinner and went home. Well I say my dad paid for the school dinner, I was left doing the washing up at home for a week.