The Memoirs of a Nobody

By Gwen Fischer

(The title is a work in progress, believe me. I mean, how am I supposed to know what to call this... thing? So I apologize for the horrible title.)

Yeah, I know every person in the entire world who writes anything about his or her self starts the story off this way. But you know what? I'm going to do it anyway, because, in my case, it is actually a very true statement, and I believe that I have every right to say it without being judged by the world. So here it is.

I'm Gwen Fischer. Just Gwen Fischer, nothing too special, really. Just your average, everyday, seventeen year old, senior, high school student.

Now, wasn't that lame? You don't have to tell me. And to be honest, I hate doing this. However, I am currently being forced, yes forced, as in against my will, to do this stupid assignment. For my Creative Writing class. Which I didn't even want to be in in the first place. But my stupid, idiot of a guidance counselor made a huge mistake with my schedule for my senior year (which is supposed to be the best year of a girls life, am I right?), and put me in this class.

And so now if I have any chance of having a future, I must do well in this class. You see, I'm sort of a paranoid perfectionist. What I mean by that is I'm kind of afraid that if I make even one little mistake, it will screw up my life, my future, basically, everything. So I MUST do everything as close to perfect as it can possibly be (because I do except the fact that perfection is impossible). And that includes this dumb class.

Now, you must be wondering what, exactly, is this dreaded assignment that I have been talking about? Well you see, my teacher was actually very vague with this nonsense. She just said, "For your first assignment, I want you to write about... you! As simple as that. You will continue writing about yourself throughout this course, and at the end, you will hand it to me. It can be about anything! You can write about something you've already experienced. Or your could just write about what happens to you as it happens. Whatever you feel like writing about yourself."

After her simple (or what she thought was simple) explanation, I raised my hand, and asked, "Ms. Armstrong, isn't this a Creative Writing class? And, well, writing about ourselves, and what actually happens to us, isn't that Non-Fiction?"

She smiled at me for a moment before saying, "Yes, you are correct. However, I believe that Creative Writing actually has roots in the truth. And authors usually write about what they, themselves, experience, or think about on a daily basis. Plus, this is a good way to define your 'voice' as an author, by starting with something simple, which is what you already know. And I would love to see you all improve throughout this class, and see you're voices develop. And that is why we are doing this assignment."

I was still slightly confused, but I decided to not ask any more questions. So that is basically why I am doing this.

Now, since you are, obviously, wasting your time by reading this, I guess I should tell you a little about myself. Well, like I mentioned my name is Gwen Fischer. I was born July 3rd, 1992. I am a cancer? To be completely honest I don't know what I'm supposed to write about myself. Like I said, I'm nothing too interesting. So I guess that means I'm going to do this assignment as it happens, not based on past experiences.

So let's see. Today I woke up (at 5:30 in the morning, might I add... damn you school!) for my last first day of high school. It's kind of sad, actually. Like, who knows what's going to happen when I go to college? With my friends, with everyone, really, that I go to school with. I just don't know what's going to happen, and to be honest, that is kind of terrifying.

So then, after getting ready for school, I drove to my best friend house. Her name is Georgina Walsh. I have known her since about the fourth grade. But we didn't become really close friends until around the sixth grade. We have gone through everything together. Especially boys. Oh lord, if you heard our guy stories...

But that's not the point. So I went to pick her up (because she doesn't have her license yet) and together we drove to school. Now, I'd, of course, seen her many times over the summer, because we are best friends. But that didn't mean we've run out of things to talk about. Actually we have too much to talk about. I swear we can go on talking for hours and then when we finally have to end the conversation we still haven't mentioned everything we had wanted to. It's kind of sad, really, how we are like that with each other.

So she was currently going on about the "love of her life." Now, what you have to understand about Georgina is that about every year, she has a new "love," so it was not too surprising to hear that she had moved on from Michael (her love from last year) and was now talking about Alex. Alexander Moore, actually. The kid that everyone knew who he was, but at the same time never actually KNEW him. The only reason I knew who Georgina was talking about was because she said, "You know, that kid who everyone said looked like Harry Potter in Middle School?" Then I remembered him.

But according to Georgina, he "So, doesn't look like Harry Potter anymore." I just figured I'd have to see for myself then form my opinion. Because, if I remember correctly, during Middle School, that was a pretty accurate description of Alex. Not to be mean, or anything. It's the truth. I swear. I mean he had the black hair that would stick out in all directions, and the glasses, everything! So I'm just telling it like it is.

So she was going on about how they met. He is a drummer in marching band, and Georgina is head Drum Major. And they met at band camp. He was chosen as Assistant Drum Major, which excited Georgina, because she said this would let them see a lot more of each other. I was thinking it was kind of perfect, two band geeks. I mean not that there's anything wrong with people in band, but if you just knew Georgina, she gives the name Band Geek a whole new meaning. And from what I knew about Alex, he seemed the same way. Also, Alex was apparently in this little punk rock band, and they would be having a show soon. Georgina was hoping Alex would invite her.

So that was what the morning discussion on the way to school was all about. And I got to school, ready to start the new year. Despite the fact that my schedule was completely wrong. I was, and still am, going to make the best of the situation.

Now, I realize you must me wondering if my teacher is going to read this, then why am I openly bashing her class? Well the answer to that is simple. I really don't care. Well, that and she said that fiction has a basis in truth, so I'm going to stay faithful to that, and tell the truth. Besides, I don't think she'll mind too much. Well, at least I hope she won't.

But that is completely besides the point. Back to my day. Now this is where it gets kind of interesting. By the time I got to lunch, I wasn't expecting too much. None of my friends were in any of my classes. And, despite what I had hoped for, none of the guys had miraculously gotten hot over the summer. So I went to the cafeteria to find that I'd gotten stuck in the lunch period with almost ALL freshman. Great.

So I just took the first empty table I saw and figured I was just going to have to be a loner this year. That or make friends with the freshman... obviously I chose the first option.

So I sat down, and pull out my book and iPod, so the obnoxious freshman would know NOT to annoy me, because we both know that they would all want to make friends with the Senior Girl. Not because I'm popular or cool or anything like that, because I most certainly am not, but just so they could say that the were friends with a senior.

Anyway, so after about five minutes of me just sitting there, happily enjoying listening to my Blink-182 and reading "To Kill A Mockingbird" someone tapped me on the shoulder.

Now I think I had made it extremely clear that I was in no mood to be bothered, especially by some freshman. So I turned around rather quickly ready to glare at whoever had the audacity to come up to me, let alone TOUCH me. But to my surprise it was definitely NOT some little freshman.

Quite the opposite, actually. This guy was clearly a senior, although I didn't recognize him. He looked like EXACTLY my type of guy. He had black hair with side bangs (yes, I know what you're thinking, typical emo guy. But hey, I guess that would make me you're typical emo girl.). He had these greenish blue eyes which could only be described as beautiful. And he wasn't too tall, maybe an inch taller than me, but, hey, I'm not one to care about height. Also, he was wearing dark blue skinny jeans, and a short sleeved, back and white striped shirt. Basically, though, he's cute. Rivaling hot, even. Which coming from me, is saying something.

Since I didn't recognize him I figured he was a new kid. Oh, how I would love to have the "New Kid," as stupid as that may sound. If you haven't gotten this by now, I really don't care. So I quickly changed my the expression on my face, from anger and annoyance, to polite, and flirty. I smiled, and said, "Hi."

A very small smile appeared on his face. "Hey. Um, do you mind if I sit with you? This place is crawling with freshman, and I don't really know anyone." Immediately, I knew this guy was awesome.

"Sure." I said, and he sat down in the seat next to me. I decided to take off the headphones and be a friendly person for a change. So I closed my book, put away the iPod and turned to this mystery guy. "So..." I said. He looked up from his own iPod (which, I noticed, was playing Blink-182 as well. Imagine that?).

Then he cleared his throat. "Oh, sorry. Um. Yeah, you're Gwen, right? Gwen Fischer?"

I was going to tell him not to apologize, but the whole knowing my name think kind of threw me off. "Excuse me?" I said before I could stop the words from coming out of my mouth.

Then his face turned slightly red. "Oh you're not. I'm sorry."

"N-no. I am Gwen. I'm just... surprised that you know my name." I paused for a moment, and when he didn't say anything, continued. "By the way, how do you know my name? Aren't you new here?"

His face turned even more red. He ran a hand threw his (beautiful) hair, and muttered something that sounded like, "Oh, yeah you probably don't know who I am. Can't believe I expected you to remember me or even know my name. Sorry." The last word he said a little louder than the rest.

So I replied, "Please, stop apologizing. Seriously, it's cool. But you're not new? I'm sorry I don't remember you, I kind of feel like a jerk now. What is you're name?"

He looked up, and I saw those beautiful eyes. He looked straight into my eyes, as if begging for some form of recognition, as he said, "Alex." I thought hard. I really did. Trying to remember.

And then it hit me. Of course! How did I not realize? The unique eyes, the black hair? And sure he had gotten some control over it and had cut it a little, and he no longer wore those glasses... but it was clear to me at that moment. "Alex Moore?" I asked, trying not to let my mouth fall open. I didn't want him to think I was too shocked from his transformation since Middle School. I mean, if this were really the "Harry Potter" kid, then I would be beyond shocked.

He nodded. "Yup."

He looked nervous, so I smiled and said, "Oh yeah, I definitely remember you. We were in tech class together for seventh and eighth grade."

He ran his hand through his hair again and said, "Yup, that was the class."

He still seemed uncomfortable so I tried my best to make him feel a little better. "Yeah. I'm sorry I didn't recognize you. But... wow you're changed, Alex."

Finally, a smile appeared on his face again, as he said, "Is that supposed to be a good thing or a bad thing?" He sounded like he was joking with me. I was glad.

"Definitely good." I said, again, without really thinking. "I mean," I said trying to make that sound not so bad, "You just look different is all."

He chuckled. "It's okay, you can say it. I was a nerd in Middle School. I know it, everyone knows it."

Now it was my turn to blush. "That's not what I meant." He looked at me, smirking as if to say 'come on, you know it's true.' So I said, "... But yeah I guess you were." And thankfully he just laughed again.

"So I hear you're in a band?" I said, after a moment of slightly awkward silence. It was the first thing that popped into my mind that I knew about him, remembering what Georgina had said this morning.

"Oh, so you've heard of us?" He seemed pleasantly surprised.

I nodded. "Yup, Ge-" I cleared my throat, thinking I shouldn't mention that Georgina had shared that particular piece of information with me. I figured she wouldn't appreciate that. So I just said, "I mean, yeah of course I have."

"Well, you're probably the only person. But, hey we're having a show in a couple of weeks. You should check it out. I mean, if you want to. I don't know if you're into our kind of music, but I figured I'd ask, cause we could always use another audience member." He said.

Now, Georgina said that she had been hoping Alex would ask her to go to his show. So I figured this was perfect to get them together. I mean, sure Alex is kind of gorgeous, but Georgina totally had first dibs. So I said, "Sure I'll go... if I can bring a friend."

He smiled. "Please, bring as many people as you'd like."

I nodded. Then asked, "So what kind of music do you guys play?" I mean, sure I already knew that they were a punk band, but I didn't want to seem like I knew too much, or more than I should at this point.

He replied, "Well, a lot of punk stuff." Just what I'd expected. "The three of us, Vince, Joey and I, are all really huge Blink fans. You know, Blink-182?"

I rolled my eyes and said, "Please, I've been listening to Blink since I knew what punk was."

"Okay," He said laughing, "Well, we cover a lot of their songs. And we're just starting to get into writing our own stuff."

I smiled, genuinely interested. "That's awesome." Alex and I continued our conversation for the rest of the period. I was actually quite glad to have someone to hang out with who was, surprisingly, really cool. Plus, if Georgina really liked him I could get to know him more this way, and maybe do a little match making? I mean, who knows, right?

Alex and I parted ways as we headed to our next class. The rest of the day was particularly uneventful. I had the feeling that the rest of the year was going to be like this as well. With my classes being boring and my lunch period with Alex being most interesting and most eventful.

At the end of the day I met Georgina in the band room so that I could drive her home. When I got there, she wasn't there yet, so I decided to just wait for her. I sat down at the drum set, which was still set up, picked up a couple of sticks off the floor, and started messing around.

Now I guess I should explain that I have ALWAYS wanted to be a drummer. It's like my secret ambition. If I could do anything, it would be to be able to play drums. So I was a little distracted with the drum set, of course, that I didn't notice someone enter the room.

It wasn't until he tapped me on the shoulder (very similar to how he did at lunch) that I noticed Alex was there, grinning at me. I'd almost forgotten, he was a drummer himself.

"Enjoying yourself there?" He asked once I'd stopped my horrible playing.

I was slightly embarrassed. I mean, here was this guy that has been playing drums since God only knows when, and is probably very good at it. And here I am making a complete idiot of myself in front of him by trying to play the drums. So I just said, trying not to let my embarrassment show, "Yes. Well, at least I was until someone interrupted me." I smiled to show him I was only joking around with him.

"Oh, my apologies." He said. Then he continued with, "Not too bad, by the way. Have you ever played before?"

I shook my head. "I wish. I've always wanted to play drums, but I've never gotten the chance."

"Well for your first time, it really wasn't too bad. I can tell you'd be really good with some practice." I rolled my eyes. I knew he was just trying to be polite. "No I'm serious!" He said when he saw my gesture. "Trust me, I know a good drummer when I see one."

I just nodded and said, "Oh, yeah. Sure." Then, to my surprise, he stuck out his tongue at me. I couldn't help but laugh out loud, and stick my tongue out right back at him. At that moment though, Georgina walked in the room to find Alex and I together, laughing hysterically.

She slowly approached us. And for some reason I felt the need to stop laughing. With Georgina, you NEVER get caught doing something like this with the guy she likes. As innocent as it may be, you just can't do it. So I quickly shut my mouth.

"Oh, hey Georgina." Alex said when he noticed that she was there. "What's up?"

"Alex. Gwen." She said, smiling politely. "You two know each other? Well, I didn't know that."

"Oh, well Alex and I sat together at lunch today. We got stuck in the freshman period." I tried to explain.

"Yeah, and I didn't know you two knew each other." Alex said, gesturing between Georgina and myself. This seemed to calm Georgina down a little. I assumed she was afraid that I had mentioned her to him, but his statement made it clear that I had not done this.

"Oh yeah, we've been friends forever." Georgina said smiling at Alex. Then she turned to me and said, "But Gwen, we really should get going." Which was her way of saying we desperately needed to talk about this, as soon as possible.

I nodded. "Right." Both Georgina and I said goodbye to Alex, and we left.

We were silent until we got to my car. I was actually kind of scared about what Georgina's reaction would be. I was just waiting for it. And then it came as soon as I pulled out of the school parking lot. But it was NOT what I had expected at all!

"Oh my God! Isn't he just GORGEOUS?!" She practically shrieked in excitement.

I just laughed, glad that she wasn't mad at me. "Yeah, sure." I didn't want her to know exactly how gorgeous I found him for some reason. So Georgina just went on and on about him all the way to her house. So much so, that for once I was actually quite glad to say goodbye to her.

So then I went home and went on Facebook. I know, I'm cool right? I'm sort of a Facebook junkie. I can spend hours on there. It's sad, really.

So anyway I'm on Facebook, and, of course, talking to Georgina on Facebook Chat. And guess who she's talking about? I bet you know. Alex.

Then, get this, Alex messages me! It's slightly... weird. I mean, not that I mind, but it's just surprising and unexpected, really.

And just like almost every conversation over the Internet, it's pretty pointless. But he's actually proving to be even cooler than I'd initially thought, if that was even possible.

Then I remembered that I had been talking to Georgina. So I looked at our conversation and saw that the last thing she had put was, "So, what are you up to now?" She tends to ask that a lot on Facebook conversations, I don't know why.

And, even though I was still talking to Alex, I didn't tell her this. Instead I just said, "You know, not much, listening to music, homework... the usual." Why do I feel like I need to hide the fact that I'm talking to Alex from Georgina? I have no idea.

I guess that's all that really happened to me that's of any importance. Not that ANY of what I have to say is of any importance to anyone else. But I feel like this whole "writing about myself" thing actually isn't to bad. It's sort of therapeutic. And kind of like a diary. Except I feel like I'm sort of writing this as a book. I never realized I could write this much about anything, let alone myself. Huh. Who knew?

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A/N: Okay, guys I know I haven't updated any of my other stories in forever, but I'm having major writers block recently, and when I got this idea I decided to take advantage of it by writing. So tell me what you guys think! Good? Bad? Should I continue? Or is it a piece of crap that I should throw away? I'd love to know! So REVIEW! Thanks.