Plagued By Guilt
Chapter One: A Virus
They say that when guilt gets to you, it really messes you up. Well, either that's not true, or I don't have a guilt complex, because I have never felt guilty about what I've done. Or, at least, that was how it used to be.
No guilt is a sign of a strong woman. If a woman has guilt then she needs someone to depend on. That is what my mom says all the time, and I believe it to be true. If I feel guilty that means I'm not as strong as I think I am.
So, I knew I was cracking when I walked into my mom's house that cold winter night. Why? Because when I walked in I saw my younger sister, Diana, screaming at my mom.
Diana looked awful. Her hair was dirty and messy. Her clothes stuck to her sweaty skin. But what was the worst thing about her was her eyes.
Her eyes were a light red; it was like someone had tried to poke them out, but instead just irritated them. You could see mascara on her face that was washed off by the tears; tears that I must have caused.
I wanted to say something comforting; something that would make her stop crying and laugh.
I used to do that all the time when we were little. I always wanted to make her happy. But, I can see that I have failed.
The way she glared at me made me realize that those days were over. Diana was clearly mad at me. I knew she must have been upset about me leaving, but she didn't understand. I had to tell her what really happened that day.
"Oh, Diana-" But that was all I got out before she cut me off and gave me some fierce words of her own.
"You cannot play God, Rosa."
Those words slowly began to plague my mind. I knew that she was talking about Chris and the abortion, but I didn't get it. I wasn't trying to play God when I went to get the abortion.
Maybe my dad had taken over Diana's mind, like Mom suggested. Maybe Diana didn't know how abortion helped confused women, like me. Or, maybe, I really did kill an innocent baby, like my dad, Diana, and even Jonathan, think.
'You cannot play God, Rosa."
Copyrighted by Insanely Random
It is finally up! The sequel to The Hurricane of My Life! Oh, yeah, and I have now decided that I will write one more book when this one is over. I'll give you guys a hint:Julia. Please PM me any grammar mistakes/typos.