I'm not afraid of falling, just that I'll never reach the ground

I'm not afraid of despair just because I always come back out

I'm afraid of mountains 'cause there's no air at the top

I'm scared of being happy because I know that it stops

..

I'm afraid of making friends because they always leave

I'm afraid of death because I don't know how to grieve

I'm afraid of knives but I can't keep them away

I'm scared by the sight of blood but I can't keep it in my veins

..

I'm afraid of hunger but I make sure I starve

I'm afraid of ugliness but I make sure I scar

I'm afraid of daylight because it shows my sins

I'm scared of the nighttime; I don't know what's within

..

I'm not afraid of being hated, just of being ignored

I'm not afraid of what they think because I know I'm worse

I'm afraid of heights because I have to come down

I'm not scared of rivers because I sort of want to drown

..

I'm afraid of friendship when I feel its embrace

I'm afraid of forgetting how it feels to be replaced

I'm not afraid of madness when I've met it in the fire

I'm scared the abyss doesn't gaze back as much as I desire

..

I'm afraid of loving because I don't want the pain

I'm not afraid of thunderstorms but I won't drink the rain

I'm afraid of feeling but only when I'm low

I'm so scared of healing 'cause better the devil that you know.

….

This is about manic depression and also how it's easier to stay unhappy because feeling better is scary, basically.