I was about to scoot more to my left when I crashed into a hard but yummy chest, I opened my eyes and I saw Terrick sleeping right beside me. He had his hands around my waist but loose enough that I was able to move around and slip out easily. Before I did though I looked around, it was dark but that was just because Terrick's room was dark, the walls, blinds, curtains, bed, furniture, everything was a dark shade, but it was elegant. I looked over at the nightstand and I noticed it was nine forty-five, time to get up, I pushed his hands off me delicately and struggled to get out of bed, not as easy as I thought it would be. For a moment I thought he would wake up but he just turned over onto his other side, I got up and stretched then made my way to the door and out of his room. The last thing I needed was for someone to find out we slept together, or next to each other actually. I crept into my room knowing that Bree would still be asleep on my bed, so in a way sleeping with… I mean sleeping next to Terrick benefited us all, Bree got the bed to herself and I got the best sleep in the whole wide world.
I jumped on her and gave her a sloppy kiss on the cheek, "Good morning!" I said.
She sleepily grumbled "Not right now Lawrence" and pushed me off, then turned away. I didn't need to ask questions, Bree was weird and I didn't need to know what 'not right now Lawrence' meant, I grabbed my clothes and off to the shower I headed.
Showers always have that way in making you feel cleaner, physically and mentally. I was actually starting a new start, it was replenishing but not a complete start, it irritated me that I couldn't tell the guys about me and Terrick but it just wasn't my decision to make and if I did tell them there would be no 'me or Terrick.' Everything just made me feel sick, this was my real family but how could I make them understand. Grrr.
When I was out of the shower, bathroom, Bree was still sleeping and so was everyone else, meaning I was up all alone and bored. I should have just slept in with Terrick, I thought, but we all know how risky that would have been and I would have never been able to sleep. I would have been with one eye open checking if someone came in, I would have been paranoid.
"What to do? What to do?" I made my way downstairs and grabbed a bowl of cereal and watched TV.
An hour had passed and no one had woken up, what was wrong with these people! It was nearly twelve in the afternoon, this wasn't abnormal, I mean they sometimes could sleep all day, but I was lonely!
I was going to wake them all up by screaming 'Fire!' but I doubt they'd move an inch, they wouldn't care, I wonder what would happen if there truly was a fire? Oh well, I'd come out alive, that's for sure.
Well those were my original plans but those were discarded, I came up with a better one.
I crept into Terrick's room and found him sleeping, big surprise. Not. I climbed onto his bed and for a few moments waited, I wonder if I stared at him hard enough or just really intense he would wake up, two minutes passed and I decided it didn't work. Next thing I did was poke him, gentle the first few times but by the sixth time I was irritated.
He was so peaceful, he only twitched when my finger came in contact with his upper chest but that was all, he was bare chest and the covers were covering his lower half, his hair was all messy and covering his eyes and his face had no facial expression, he was just sleeping. He looked so cute. To bad I had to ruin it.
I poked him one last time, this time on his cheek, he opened his eyes slowly, voila! I smiled.
He grabbed my hands, and pulled me towards him, this all happened so quick I wasn't prepared. Next thing I knew I was snuggly curled up next to him, he had both my hands captured and placed between our chest and both my legs were caught between his strong ones, I couldn't move. I was facing him and he was smirking at me,
"I thought you were sleeping" I said quite disgruntled, this is not what I had planned.
"You were poking me." was all he said.
"Because I thought you were sleeping!" I pouted.
"You left me." he said as he closed his eyes and buried his face in the cook of my neck, it tickled but felt wonderful.
"You noticed?" I said, feeling out of breath, "But you were sleeping." he really needed to stop the whole charade of 'pretending to be asleep.'
"Shush. Go to sleep." gasp! It's twelve! But I did, wasn't the smartest thing I had ever done, and trust me I'm known for my stupid moments.
(2 hours later.)
"Hey Terrick do you…" a very sleepy, but now wide awake and pissed Vice was saying but stopped when he saw us. But instead of waking up and running I snuggled closer to Terrick and waited for the irritating voice to go away. Terrick on the other hand had already been awake, he probably just didn't want to move and wake me up. Anyways, Vice was standing in the doorway, heaving, I slowly woke up, and once my brain had properly understood the situation, I screamed one of those shrill ear piercing screams and covered my self up, but I wasn't naked, Terrick and Vice starred at me oddly while Bree and Mace showed up to see what was going on, then Sinister appeared as well, what? Oh god, Where did he come from? I saw Bree had a passive look on her face while Mace had a blank stare and I saw Sinister roll his eyes and well Vice was just ready to kill someone…Terrick I think. When I looked at Terrick he had his normal, 'I don't care face' but I wonder how he was really feeling, was he panicking like me? He was the naked one. Oh god, naked! Well he had boxers, doesn't help. I slammed back in to the pillows and closed my eyes, 'not good' was the only thing running through my head.
"Terrick, Ronny! Downstairs, Now!" he was about to leave, "and get dressed," I'm guessing he directed that at Terrick "Ronny go to your room." and that at me.
Bree was already in my room waiting for the details,
What happened? What he do? What you do? And how was it? Were some of the few questions being thrown at me.
"Nothing, nothing, nothing, because nothing happened." I told her, biting on my nails in worry for what was to come, I was laying on my bed, I could have just slept in my room, why did I go into his room, "stupid Bree!" this was all her fault if you think about it, considering she was sleeping in my bed so I had to look for another bed to sleep in.
"What did I do you slut?" she said just as Mace walked in, he furrowed his eyebrows,
"You slept with him?" he asked, I sat up and tried to explain but was cut off
"Don't bother asking, she'll deny it" Bree said as she walked by him and left.
"I…" I was about to try to explain once again but Terrick had walked into my room, dressed, but his eyes weren't on me they were on Mace, he walked in with a scowl on his face, grabbed my hand and led me downstairs, what was that? He didn't say anything just kept his eyes ahead, when I looked up at his face, he wasn't so mad anymore just blank, as if he were contemplating something. We went down the stairs and into the kitchen, with my free hand I raised it to my mouth and chewed on my nails, bad habit I had when I was nervous. Terrick must have noticed because he squeezed my hand and looked down at me. It was those subtle things that just reassured me things would be fine. I hoped…
Once we arrived he let go of my hand making sure no one had seen us, odd, just a few minutes ago he was all for it, making sure Mace noticed but now not so much. He sat down first and looked at Vice, I couldn't even look in his direction, keeping my eyes on my hands and analyzing them, I needed to paint my nails, maybe get a manicure.
Some one cleared their throat, Rage, its funny how fast news traveled around here.
"Is someone going to tell me what you guys were doing in the same bed, naked." Rage's eyes grew wide for a moment when he heard of this.
"I was dressed and he wasn't completely naked." Vice glared, not liking my input "just saying, might want to clear…" his glare intensified tens fold "never mind."
"You have a room," Vice directed that at me.
"It was being used." was all that came to my mind, lame.
"I thought you couldn't stand each other." Vice added, while Jeremy stepped into the kitchen
"There's a fine line between love and hate." Jeremy then said, we all glared at him. "Got it. Leaving."
"Did you…" Vice was trying to form a sentence but he shook his head and tried to rephrase what he was going to say "are you… no" another bad thought "are you…" shook his head once more and sat down to think more clearly. "What did…"
"Nothing happened" Terrick spoke steadily, obviously irritated by the big deal they were making this into.
Just as he said that Blair made her presence known.
"I got the text! Where's Ronny, is she glowing? Is it true? Aww she's no longer a virgin! Ronny!" I was going to kill Blair, first because she was saying pure lies, secondly because she was one loud bitch and thirdly because if it would have been true she would have let the world know in less than three seconds my privacy!
I looked at her with the most crazy, insane, mad, berserk, furious face I could muster, but she obviously didn't get mad or feel the least dismay.
"Wow, wasn't expecting that face, more of a 'yey, look at me, I'm happy!'" she said, I. Was. Going. To. Kill. Her.
"You said nothing happened" Vice then growled out at Terrick hearing what Blair had just declared but what surprised me the most was that out of nowhere Mace's fist came in contact with Terrick's face Terrick didn't take it so well, next thing I knew fist where flying and blood was falling. Terrick had the upper hand, I didn't know if to be happy or scared. The boys reacted quickly though, Rage got Terrick and Vice took care of Mace,
"What is wrong with you guys, so I slept in the same bed with Terrick," I knew my face was heating up considering these were embarrassing words I was speaking but I tried to keep my eyes intense, focused and away from Terrick, he still had that way of intimidating me when it came to having 'this talk' or close to it. "Nothing happened, do you not trust him?" of course not "I mean what about me, you do trust me...right? And I'm allowed to date or do whatever the eff I want, I'm tired of being treated like a child, its embarrassing and not needed." this would be a great exit speech, where I just leave pissed at the world but mostly at these asshole but I was just frozen, in place, and so this happened.
"Then maybe you shouldn't go whoring around with..." before Mace could finish that sentence Terrick already had him on the ground beating him to a bloody pulp, and while everyone was focused on them I left out the door while Blair followed me outside, finally my feet decided to move.
"Wanna go for a ride?" I nodded my head, I was still pissed at her but in reality who can I blame but myself.
I had been quiet for twenty minutes now, gnawing at my bottom lip considering what to say until the words just slipped out of my mouth.
"I didn't sleep with him, I mean I slept next to him but not with him." I said looking at the passing scenery. "I just wish I had, that way they would really have something to talk about and a real reason to call me a whore."
"You are not a whore, and Mace got what he deserved, knowing Terrick he probably beat the living shit out of him, I'm actually concerned for his wellbeing." she laughed "you know, Terrick really does care for you, its odd but this is the most emotion I ever seen come out of him for a girl, I mean he beats up people a lot but not just for little things like some guy calling a girl a whore, he must of really cared about you to do that. and I don't want to make this a mushy cute moment but I'm being serious, whatever your doing to him to have him wrapped around your little finger is something big, he's getting into fights, taking shit for you, he's doing a lot just for you, its…" she looked at me with a smile on her face "its cute, Terrick actually has feelings." she laughed once more, just more meaningful this time, I on the other hand thought about this, I was putting Terrick in the worst situation and now considering they knew about us more stuff would be happening, more fights, more rude comments, I knew Blair meant well by telling me this but now I'm not sure me and Terrick would be together much longer he would probably realize this is to much and just dump me.
I let out a deep breath of air I had been holding in, Blair looked at me.
"Ronny? Why aren't you smiling? You are like the luckiest girl in the whole wide world, you have Terrick literally feeding out of the palm of your hand."
"Not for long." I said looking at my hands, I really need to stop biting my nails.
"What? Why do you say that?" I looked at her.
"Blair, your right, I'm putting him through all this. He's getting into fights everybody is telling him stuff, soon he'll realize it's not worth it, I haven't even slept with him! He's going to dump me soon enough."
"Ronny a relationship isn't based on having sex," I looked at her with my you shut-the-fuck-up face, she and Rage did it like 24/7 but she ignored it and continued,
"If it were Terrick wouldn't be with you sweetie. I mean he could be out there sleeping with any girl and getting all the STD's he wants but he chooses to simply just spend time with you. Terrick isn't dumb, he knows your not ready and he knows this was going to happen sooner or later, but he stuck with you didn't he? You need to give him much more credit. I think he might love you."
"Love?" Blair nodded her head, I mean I like Terrick a lot and sure sometimes I say I love him but now that Blair was telling me all these things it scared me, this was too much.
"Love me?" she nodded her head once again as we pulled up at a dinner, I wasn't even sure were we were at.
"Yup, he's different with you, but anyways don't think about this too much, you have a way of overreacting and over analyzing things too much, its simple, its love." she smiled as she let the last word drag out, it gave me the chills, not sure if good or bad. I got out of the car and I followed.
We had ordered and Blair was just looking around, she had said she always passed by this place but never came in and ate here.
"What if I don't love him back? I mean, I like him a lot." Blair looked at me quizzically, and then rolled her eyes.
"See there you go thinking too much, I told you not to do that."
"I'm not. I'm just saying." she rolled her eyes again.
"Well when you like someone a lot I think that means you love someone."
"Not exactly" the waitress bringing our food said butting in but I listened "sometimes that's just infatuation, when you love someone you'll know all on your own sweetie, you'll get butterflies when you kiss and you'll want to be with that person every second and there's these other feelings."
Blair glared at her "thank for the input."
"Glad I could help." She smiled sweetly, she was then on her way, leaving me confused.
"How will I know?"
"She doesn't know anything, you guys do love each other, ok. Your just confused, stupid waitress." Blair then ate her food and it was quiet for the time being.
"Ronny you eat slow and you only got a slice of pie!" Blair whined, "and I just got like five text all about you, Rage didn't even bother asking how I was, he went straight on asking about you."
"Whose were the other four from?"
"Terrick, of course. Bree, Sinister and Vice. Didn't you bring your phone?"
"Nope" I said shoving pie into my face and making a mess just as Terrick walked in through the door. I cleaned up quickly and glared at Blair.
"What is he doing here?" I whispered to Blair, while he looked around searching for us.
"Oh, Terrick?" she said turning around and looking at him, I nodded my head keeping my eyes on him as well "I told him to come when he had texted me earlier." she said turning back around to face me.
"When exactly did you receive these texts?" she could have told me he was coming, I deserve that much.
"Like thirty minutes ago…" she thought about it "yup, thirty minutes ago." she then called Terrick over, signalizing with her can to come over.
"And you barely told me?" I whispered before he made his way close enough to hear, she nodded her head and smiled at me,
"I just told him, no one else and you guys have a lot to talk about. So this is a good thing." she said while getting up and allowing Terrick to take her seat across from me. Suddenly I felt nervous, palms sweating, and I noticed the sun was going down, if I weren't acting weird I'd find this quite romantic.
"Well I'm going to go." Blair said, "and don't worry, I wont tell the guys especially Vice that you two are having this cute, little date…together…this close…having fun…eating, maybe making out…" Terrick glared at her noticing I was growing uncomfortable, "ok well… I'm going to go, for real now, bye!" she then left, god I hated her.
"Well what can I get you two." I new waitress said followed by an "oh dear." it was then that I noticed Terrick had a bruise forming on his cheek and on his temple, it wasn't bad, I bet Mace was left much worse.
"Two chocolate milkshakes." was all Terrick said then turned to me hoping she would take the hint and leave. The waitress gave one of those half smiles and left.
We had this awkward silence going on for a while until the waitress came with our order.
"Here you are" she said placing the two chocolate milkshakes along with a slice of pie and two forks.
"We didn't.." Terrick was saying
"It's on the house." She smiled and left, she could at least given us two pies, can't she see it's awkward enough! Well on my part, because Terrick looked relax, but doesn't he always. He was either looking down at the table or at something more interesting, maybe he was feeling the tension.
In the end we just decided to go home and the ride home was just as quiet and awkward.
When did I become this quiet, this shy or just this tiny? I felt so small when put next to him, its like if I didn't have the courage to speak up or just say something. Last night things were fine, why was I acting this weird today?
Few more minutes of silence and the words just came out, I should really think things through before I speak.
"We probably rushed into things, spur of the moment." that wasn't meant to come out, it was just a thought, but it did come out.
He didn't say anything, but his movements and reaction to my words made me freeze and want to take back everything. His grip on the steering wheel tightened and he became stiff, god I just wished he could speak up and tell me what it was he wanted, it would have helped our situation so much! But he didn't for the rest of the ride home.
When we had arrived I got out of the car, not expecting a 'wait' 'hold on for a moment' not even a 'good bye' I left inside the house and up my room so I wasn't sure if he drove off or if he waited outside and then came in.
When I entered my room I saw Bree packing, she looked up at me
"Ronny, what's wrong?" glad she wasn't mad anymore.
"What do you mean?"
I nodded my head
"Did he breakup with you?"
"Well things were a bit more complicated than that, I said some words and from there on … I don't know! But he didn't even say something. How can we be in a relationship if one doesn't talk?"
"God I feel bad." Bree said.
I looked at her confused and whipped my tears away, "why?" I hadn't even notice I was crying.
"I have to go. I got an apartment, my parent did me the favor of moving in all the furniture and stuff while I stayed here, I can move in today. Ronny, I'm good to go." well I figured she was leaving when I saw her packing but suddenly everything kicked in, she was leaving me and I felt so lonely here. I sat on the bed and broke down crying.
"Sweetie don't cry, and remember my proposition? It still stands, if you want you can come live with me for a while if not forever." she smiled brightly "you don't need him, come with me it will clear your mind for a bit and then you'll figure out what to do." I don't know if it was the depressing state I was in but that offer was starting to sound really, really good. So I packed my bags and everything, I was moving in.
"And your single and ready to mingle, and much more." she smiled but I didn't return it. Ugh! I fell back on the bed and closed my eyes.
A/N: Whoa, that was a long wait. Sorry, its just I got preoccupied and well so did Katy. Anyways read and review, I hope you like it (: