I am pressed against the door
My back to my life, my back to the world
I hold my arm in my hand, run my finger over the veins
Oh how beautiful this is
The veins respond to my touch
Chills run down my spine as I feel them begging
They beg to be cut
To be ripped
Oh how you will pay
I know you will die inside
How could you make me feel this way
I pull on the seams of the scars in my heart
I feel the tugging of the stitches
They're about to come loose
This world has been cruel to me
I was born a broken fool
A joke of a child
A crime of a person
My soul never ripened past hell
I was born to be a sinner
There are no reparations
I have no second chance
Here comes the tide
I feel it brimming on the horizon
The dam is near bursting
Cut one, horizontal
The demons egged me on
And how could they do this to me?
How could they expect me to live this way?
Isn't seventeen years enough suffering?
I wonder how many I can make
Before the final blow is upon me
There is so much blood, it's everywhere
It gushes to the floor
I leave a present with my passing
Fuck your perfect carpet
In your perfect home, your perfect life
They come now the flurries
Little blizzards of venom sent rushing through these veins
The venom splatters out, the room is getting dark
I'm dizzy and giddy with joy
Anger. I'm angry.
It's not fair.
What could I have been?
What could I have done?
I was condemned.
Nothing could be different.
What a cruel fucking joke.
Seven, what is it, eight now?
I feel like I've lost count.
Two, three more for good measure.
My arm is like a canvas
I paint my vision for you to see.
One last stroke and my life's work is done.
One last... stroke.
Before you fade, I see your face.