Summary: Er... so my mom's a milf. And then there's this arrogant guy with yet black hair and stunning green eyes I just kind of ran into at Starbucks...

a Caffeine Addict or a MILF?

Oneshot By breatheyou7

"You're such a caffeine addict, Whit," Kaitlyn pointed out as she jumped into the passenger's seat of my rusty silver Volvo. I'd been lucky enough to inherit it from my dad when I turned sixteen last year.

"Tell me something I don't know," I retorted nonchalantly and turned on the engine. The wealthy familiar roar erupted and I drove out of the driveway. Kaitlyn fixed with the radio so her favourite pop station tuned in correctly. She started singing along with the oh-so-annoying new hit song from Jason Derulo that she probably new every word to by heart. I tuned out the noises and focused on the road ahead of me. The middle class houses swept by us as I sped up and the bright sun almost blinded me dangerously.

I pulled up at our town's only Starbucks a few minutes later and Kaitlyn (finally) stopped singing that hideous song as we got out of the car. I put a light hand on my chest and sighed amiably while looking at the café in front of me with a dreamy expression. "Look at that beauty."

Kaitlyn laughed and rolled her eyes good-naturedly. "Please, baby," she shoved me forward with her hands on my back, making me stumble. "Just go get your coffee already."

"You know what?" I said and tapped my chin with a finger thoughtfully, pretending to think. "I'm actually going to listen to you for once."

"About time," Kaitlyn groaned before I yanked her arm and ran towards the shop with her in tow, trying to keep up with my fast running. I had just reached the door when it flung open and SMACK!

I fell to the asphalt with a loud thud. My head was spinning and my forehead ached miserably. My elbows had scratches and a few drops of blood managed to slip through my summer-tanned skin.

Kaitlyn suppressed a giggle but reached out to help me up. I glared at her but took her hand and got up, I stretched to my entire 5'4 length and sent another glare her way before turning to the door again. But then I noticed there was a guy standing there, blocking my way while doubling over in laughter.

...A guy with yet black hair and a totally fit body as well. Totally hot. No need to leave out details.

"Omg," he started while trying to catch his breath. "I'm so-orry," He straightened up slightly. "- but gosh, that was just so funny!"

I felt a flush creep up my cheeks in embarrassment. For Christ's sake, I had just run into a door. Like literally run into a door and then fallen flat on my ass in front of the most attractive guy ever.

Damn me and my luck.

He stifled a snort of laughter. I looked up from my feet and felt anger coiling up inside me. He should be sorry! I'm not the one who was careless enough to just yank open a door without looking if-

Okay, so maybe it was my fault I ran into the goddamn door.

"Stop laughing, you prick!" I yelled at him. Now maybe I earned the embarrassment considering I just rushed forward without looking but he didn't have a right to laugh at me like that.

He smothered his laughs fully but a grin slowly spread over his face. "You -you just-" He struggled with his words and pointed a finger at me before he broke down in hysterics again.

"Can you get the fuck out of my way?" I howled and pushed his chest to get him to move.

"The bitch hasn't gotten her daily intake of caffeine yet so you better move if ya wanna get away alive rather than a piece of grilled steak," Kaitlyn interposed and smiled knowingly at him.

"Whatever," he said and moved out of my path. I strode past him with a resentful scowl. The line to the counter was long and it was only one employee taking orders.

"My god, baby, that was one hot guy!" Kaitlyn burst out beside me. A huge smile on her excited face.

"Albeit, a rude one," I said and sent her another one of my famous glares.

"Well, it was kind of fu-" she started but shut up when she saw my expression.

The line moved forward slightly. "Honestly Kait, sometimes I just really, really wonder why you're my friend," I shot her a pointed look. "I just had the most humiliating moment and you're laughing at me."

"Then again, it's not like you never do anything embarrassing," she said and rolled her eyes. "right, babes? That's just who you are. You make a fool of yourself all the time. Nothing you can do anything 'bout anyway."

"I swear I'm going to murder you if you don't shut up this instant." I glared but she ruffled my hair affectionately.

A few moments went by and the line grew smaller ahead of us.

"Like seriously," Kaitlyn began and started laughing hysterically. "Who runs into a door, Whit?! A door!"

"Shut up!" I punched her on the arm and she whined loudly.

"It was funny..." she muttered whilst rubbing her arm where I had hit her. I pretended not to hear and moved farther ahead instead.

o0o0O0o0o

I woke up the next morning from the gaudy sound of my alarm clock. I groaned exasperatedly but forced myself up in a sitting position. A drowsy teenage girl with half-closed eyelids and hazel coloured hair standing out in every direction mirrored back at me. I stumbled out of bed and stalked over to my closet opposite of my bed and opened the sliding doors to search for some clothes. Every piece of cloth were out of order, everything was disarranged into a complete mess. I tossed a light blue shirt with some random text on and a pair of skinny jeans on the bed before fumbling off to the bathroom to take a shower and get ready.

Fuck Mondays, and school and its early mornings.

I had just started my junior year less than a month ago and I was already sick and tired of it. I go to West High and it's not really special, just a simple school with the same things going on like at every other stupid high school. We have the cliques like the it-crowd, the geeks, outcasts, know-it-alls and such. I think I'll fit in with the outcasts. I'm not going to whine and complain about that though, I don't find it necessary to be popular. Especially if it means acting like a total bitch and talk down on everyone below me on the social food chain.

Although yes, I admit I can be a bitch at times. But it's a different kind of bitchy way. You see, I don't intend on ruining peoples life just because they don't wear designer clothes and starve themselves and flirt with every living being resembling a super hot model.

Eh, I sound bitter, don't I? I really am not. Trust me, I love my friends and their crazy ways and I like being who I am. That's the greatest accomplishment, being who you are even when people around you try to make you something you're not. I'm not going to party away my future.... so I better just suck it up and finish school with muy fantástico grades.

I wrapped a towel around my body and blow-dried my hair. I usually just wear powder foundation, a little bronzer, eyeliner and mascara for make-up so that's what I applied to my not-so-gorgeous face today as well. I don't have many pimples or any other major problems with my skin so I wouldn't need the foundation to be honest. I just always liked make-up, within a certain amount though of course. Besides, powder foundation isn't exactly that bad for the skin and it looks natural.

I threw on my clothes and went downstairs to the kitchen. Isabelle, my mother, was sitting by the kitchen table with a cup of coffee in her hand and a newspaper in the other. She looked up when she heard me descend from the stairs and smiled a light smile. Her light blue eyes twinkling like always. She was impeccably dressed with a tight skirt and blouse, her dark brown, curly hair which she preferred having down, was up in a bun. She was beautiful, she was thin and sweet...

… and she was hot. Yes, no fucking need to go reread that okay? I just said my mom was hot. She is hot. As awkward as that is to admit, it's so true. She had me when she was fifteen and she and Heath, my dad, decided to keep me. She always says it's the best thing that's ever happened to her. They got a divorce three years ago. I didn't see it coming until dad was standing at the front door, a sad expression on his face and a suitcase in hand.

She's a MILF though- my mum. A hot, sweet, beautiful, charming milf.

The sad part is, she dates guys even I could date. Just imagine when she brings home a 20-year old guy who's just about four years older than me. It's kind of awkward. I would never even consider dating one of her boyfriends though, just so you know. The mere thought makes me want to hurl up in front of the toilet and barf my guts out.

"You need a ride to school today, Whitney?" Mum asked and took a sip of her coffee.

I poured myself some milk and cereals. "No, thanks. I have a car, y'know."

She shrugged and got back to her newspaper. And then I finally acknowledged that beautiful scent I was so accustomed to-newly brewed coffee. I sniffed the air like a dog. "Gimme some of that!" I screeched alarmingly and stretched out my hands towards her cup. I pouted my bottom lip and blinked my eyelashes at her.

"Honeybee, you're crazy," mum giggled and rolled her eyes. "I left some for you in the brewer," she then added and nodded towards our kitchen counter. I sprinted to it and poured myself a cup of steaming coffee. I gulped and smiled.

"It's not normal for a 16-year old to be this addicted to coffee, is it, honeydew?" She laughed and I pouted back at her. I really loved Isabelle even though guys my age would probably ditch me for her. Seriously. She's the best, albeit a little immature and exuberant but she's crazy sweet and I wouldn't survive without her.

o0o0O0o0o

School had been a drag and when I finally pulled up in front of our red brick house, I was both exhausted and exasperated. Some people just get on my nerves. Like today, Evelyn Houston, a girl in my English class decided to bug me throughout the whole class as she found the subject extremely tedious.

Which is why she decided to tell me about her last minute shopping trip to New York the previous month. Oh, so incredibly fascinating it was to hear her rant about all the different shoes she'd been trying and when she had a facial at a tasteful spa with her mother but the receptionist acted so very rude towards them that she almost felt like suing her. To top it off, she decided to follow me around for the rest two periods because I was, "such a great listener", until I snapped at her rudely and she finally got the hint and left.

So when I stepped inside our front door, I was not only tired and irritated, I was on the verge of a breakdown and I was in desperate need of a coffee considering the lack of said drink I had had today.

"'ello?" I grunted as I stepped into the kitchen and looked around. No one answered which wasn't that surprising since mum usually got off work around 5 pm and, I glanced at the clock, it was only 3.30 now.

I walked over to the counter and served myself some coffee before heading off to the living room, planning on spending the next few hours occupied by our lovely T.V and presumably watching MTV. Maybe just curl up under the blanket or stretch out all over our black leather couch. Well, that's what I did and was still doing three hours later. Albeit, add a couple visits to the kitchen and the coffee machine. I'm hopeless. Completely and utterly hopeless.

My mind did wander over to my backpack which I had left back in the kitchen a couple times though, that's where all my homework could be found. You could really think that, considering that I seem to have no, whatsoever social life, that's where my attention should have been, i.e. on my homework. But no, I'm so completely hopeless and pathetic and lazy that I just can't bother with it, even though I'm considerably behind in three subjects. Might as well go 'party away my future' if I'm going to keep this up. Heh.

I heard the front door open and then my mum's silky smooth voice as she called out a 'hello'.

"Why are you home so late?" I wondered as she walked into the living room where I was sitting, or rather lying sprawled out on the couch. It was 6.45 and she hadn't called or left a note or any other explanation as to why she hadn't been home when she usually got off work.

To my surprise, mum started fidgeting with her earrings uneasily. I raised a brow questioningly and observed her rather 'nervous' behaviour. Something was up.

She stopped the fidgeting and smiled instead. She sat down beside my feet but I pulled up in a sitting position instead, resting my back at the armrest with my face towards her. "Well there's this..." she peered up at me with a cheeky expression and I new what was coming before she even had time to elaborate any further. "-guy who I genuinely like, babes. We've been going out for the past two weeks and I figured you might want to meet him", she finished off and watched me zealously.

I tried not to glare at her. I couldn't help but feel sceptic towards this. Towards him although I had no clue what he was like. What I did know though, was that mum always claimed she "really liked him" and what she thought could develop into something like a real and stable relationship, usually ended in disaster mere days later. You wouldn't have to be perceptive to understand that mum was naïve in some ways, and the subject 'love' was definitively not a subject in which she reasoned with maturity and responsibility. I couldn't remember all the countless of times I'd been comforting her with Ben & Jerry's Ice cream and season reruns of Gilmore Girls while wiping her mascara covered face after yet another one of her break-ups. Although, on the plus side, she tended to recover approximately two days afterwards.

I, however, didn't like the idea of meeting with her boyfriend whom she had only dated for two weeks. "Are you sure that's such a good idea?" I queried.

"Yeah, I think he's ready to meet you now, huns," she ruffled my hair and I sighed inaudible, feeling frustrated. Those introductions with her boyfriends were often, not to say always, altogether horrible and embarrassing, especially if the "man" was younger.

"Oh, really?" I disputed. "Well if you say so," I said, sarcasm dripping along my words. She didn't notice, or so I presumed at least, and smiled widely whilst tilting her head slightly to the right. "Bye , Mum," I then finished, dismissing her with a hand. I tried keeping the petulance out of my voice but probably failed miserably.

Again, she was totally oblivious to my querulousness and dissatisfaction so she strutted off happily before stopping at the door-frame. "He'll be over in half an hour. Is that alright, sweets?"

Like fuck no? "Whatever," I settled for and rolled my eyes immaturely.

o0o0O0o0o

I didn't bother change clothes or freshen up. Mum was in the kitchen finishing up the dinner she was going to serve. She always put a lot of effort into the dishes whenever she had a boyfriend over. I had to admit, she was a great cook and her desserts made my mouth water.

She glanced over at the clock and straightened out her tight skirt with both hands and then asked me to put on her silver necklace. A blue pendant with swirls in a darker shade of blue in it. If I remember correctly, it was my grandmother, Lithia's necklace. She passed away some years ago but we were always close. She used to come over, at least, every other week for dinner and afterwards we put a film in the DVD and her wrinkly, petite hand stroked my hair absently while the three of us sat curled up on the couch together.

The bell rang and mum squealed excitedly before strutting over to open it.

I sighed and went back to the living room, Secret Life of Ryan was on so I flopped down on the couch and turned up the volume. He was skating for some huge competition and his family and friends were watching. I wasn't really impressed by that boy truthfully. Seems like all he does, besides travelling though, is complain and whine about signing autographs to his fans and going on trips to Japan. Yeah, like he's got so much to complain about. Trips abroad to beautiful countries and money in huge amounts.

And then he took of his shirt and I leaned forward subconsciously, ogling the screen with my 100 % attention. Well, well maybe he ain't all that bad-

Someone coughed. "Hon, this is Ashton Cole," mum nodded eagerly towards a guy next to her.

I think my eyes bulged out of their eye sockets and I almost choked on the air.

Hell no. So what I surmised was that the guy next to her was her boyfriend, yeah, but that guy was familiar. His hair was yet black and his features strikingly gorgeous. He was gorgeous, beautiful, hot...

… and young. Indeed very young. From what it looked like at least.

However, I didn't even mention his eyes. They were green and oh-so mesmerizing.

It hit me then. I felt my hand reach up to touch my forehead and my eyes grew wider. I bet you already figured it out, but if you need some help, he was the rude boy I ran into at Starbucks. Or perhaps, ran into the door.

He waved and smiled cheekily. "Hi."

I growled and glared and groaned and... glared even harder. Just my friggin luck.

"I'm sorry, mum, but I really don't feel so well. Do you think I could just go to my room?" I turned to mum and asked.

She looked perplexed and her face fell substantially. "Oh... well I guess."

"Thanks," I stalked off to the stairs and then ran to my room when I was out of eyesight.

I repeat, hell no. That was so awkward. What if he recognised me? That would really make things even worse. It looked like he did though, grinning so mockingly when I walked out of the room.

I knew mum was a MILF, right, but I seriously didn't think she'd be able to get together with guys like... him. He was out of her league and way too young. What is he thinking, dating someone so much older than him? I doubt he's even graduated high school. Well he might be a freshman in college.

o0o0O0o0o

That wasn't the last time I saw him-Ashton Cole. Surprisingly, mum and Ashton were yet to break up and as the next two weeks passed by, he came over a little now and then, disturbing my peace. I practically fled whenever he walked into the same room as me. Whether if he was over for dinner or just picking mum up for a date, he was there and it bothered me greatly. So I hid. I went over to my friends' houses, I locked myself up in my room or went for a drive when they had dinner or hung out in the living room.
My strategies worked though and I only had to exchanged a few brief `hello's´ or a nod in his direction. Truthfully, I reckoned mum didn't even notice any peculiar strange behaviour from my side. She was in her own happy little bubble and I guess a part of me was strangely happy for her. She deserved to find someone who's right for her.

Then again, what if it actually worked out between she and Ashton? Like, would he become my `daddy´ then, or what?

Ew. Strange thought.

It was Friday afternoon and I was in my room. Jimmy Eat World was on highest volume, blaring through the speakers and I was lying stomach down on my bed, wearing a pair of thin grey sweatpants and a turquoise tank top. Doodling strange things in my textbook out of boredom.

Mum and Ashton were having dinner downstairs.

I started when someone knocked on my door and sat up instead. "What?" I groaned impatiently, I swear mum never get a hint to leave me alone.

I heard a faint voice answering from the other side of the door. Only it wasn't who I expected, instead of my mum's smooth tone, came a darker more masculine voice. "You wanna turn down that noise?"

I stalked over to my door and yanked it open. "What the fuck do you want?"

"Gee, Whit. Take a chill?" He shrugged and smirked as he pushed himself past me and into my room. He walked over to the stereo and tried getting the volume down a notch. I caught up to him and pushed him away from the buttons.

"I repeat: what the fuck do you want?" I glowered at him.

He put on some stupid puppy face. "Turn down the volume, pretty please?"

I crossed my arms and stared at him furiously. Unfortunately, the last track came to its end and the CD stopped playing. A deafening silence filled the room and I heard each one of my breaths.

Ashton backed away and sat down on my bed instead. I glared at him disdainfully but he just grinned back.

"Your mother had do some errands for work, some guy forgot some important stuff that had to be done for the weekend or something...." He scratched his neck thoughtfully.

I raised an eyebrow. "And... you're here because?"

"Well, 'cause I was waiting in the living room and she's taking some time so I just got... like bored," he explained absent-mindedly as he began looking around my room.

"'So I just got, like, bored'," I mimicked sardonically. "What are you, a 13-year-old girl?"

He rolled his eyes. "No that's you, kid. I'm a freshman in college."

"Could have fooled me," I muttered and sighed impatiently.

Ashton started poking and fiddling with some of my stuff at the desk, holding up my system camera (a very expensive one I might add) but then put it back down (thank God) and walked over to my Xbox 360.

"You've got an Xbox?" He queried and pointed at the game console, somewhat astonished.

I sighed again. Would he stop looking through my stuff? "What d'you think it looks like, Einstein?" I sneered, he answered by cocking an eyebrow questioningly. "Got it from my cousins if you're so interested to know."

He smirked mischievously. "Wanna play?"

"Whatever." I walked over to the TV and grabbed the control. I flopped down next to him on the hardwood floor.

o0o0O0o0o

"Woot! I won! I won!" I jumped up from the floor and did a little happy dance, wriggling my hips lightly. "In your face, Ashdonkey!" I laughed mockingly. He just rolled his eyes back at me joined with a shrug.

"Where's Isabelle, anyway?" Ashton wondered and glanced down at his wristwatch.

"I don't know. She usually takes her time," I shrugged while bending back down to put away the controllers. We'd been playing for the past half an hour, I won three of four games. Take that sucker!

"Oh well...." He began before looking back at me. "Wanna go watch some TV with me until she's back then?"

"Afraid to be alone, huh?" I teased.

"No, not really, kid."
I glared at him. "Stop calling me a kid for Christ's sake."

He smirked, his gorgeous green eyes twinkling with amusement. "Well, you are one after all."

"Am not." I argued stubbornly.

"I believe you are." He said matter-of-factly but then nudged my arm jokingly. "First one down gets the leather sofa!" He challenged and started towards the door. I rushed past him and headed for the stairs, he caught up with me somewhere in the middle of the stairs and ran past me just when we reached the end of it.

My foot slipped on the last step so I reached out to grab something. The closest thing was unfortunately Ashton's neck. He stumbled against my sudden weight and I dragged him down with my own fall.

And he landed on top of me. His breath tickled my face and his eyes bored into mines, almost making me shiver by his intense orbs.

And then he leaned down and kissed me. Just like that, on my lips, with his.

And it felt amazing. He pressed his body further against mine and deepened the kiss. He was fierce and harsh and it just felt heavenly. His tongue then traced my bottom lip-

...and oh my God! I'm kissing my mother!

I immediately pulled away. His breathing was ragged and fast and his cheeks flustered. I pushed him off of me and got up just in time as my mum walked inside the house.

She giggled and raised an eyebrow at Ashton. "Baby, what are you doing on the floor?" Baby? EW! I wanted to puke.

Ashton scratched his neck nervously and let out a low chuckle.

o0o0O0o0o

I cheated on my mother. I'm so awful. I'm a slut. A slut. A friggin slut!

What am I supposed to do now? She was finally so happy. I crashed my head against the pillow, frustrated at myself. My stomach hurled unpleasantly from quilt.

On the other hand, Ashton was the one who took the initiative, he started it. I didn't, I pushed him away!

Yes, only after you kissed him back and enjoyed it!

I still pushed him back....

You're a very horrible, horrible daughter!

I bolted upright and threw the pillow against my wall. It hit the poster of Paramore and then fell down on a bunch of clothes.

Look what he does! That stupid Ashton Cole, coming her and ruining everything! Even making me throw stuff at my flipping favourite band! I groaned exasperatedly and fell back on the bed again, squashing a pillow against my face.

o0o0O0o0o

However, I soon found out that that was not our last kiss.

The second time he kissed me was on Thursday the next week. He had arrived at our house just after school ended for the day and mum was still at work, like she usually was at that time a day. I hadn't expected him to come over and was therefore seated in the leather couch watching Made. I giggled when a girl on the show couldn't do any more push-ups and started whining and crying. Ashton walked in then and asked what was so funny, I had simply pointed to the TV and then stopped laughing. He'd sat down next to me and then, all of a sudden, his lips were on mines

again.

I'd pulled away abruptly, although I have to admit it took some time to pull my thoughts together, and yelled at him for kissing me again. He'd scratched his neck and muttered something I couldn't make out.

"What the hell is your problem?" I'd demanded of him furiously. "You're together with my mum, you can't just go around kissing other girls, dumbass!"

"I don't know," he'd answered truthfully.

"Well if you don't like her you have to break up, you can't go fool around behind her back," I'd scowled despisefully and then left the room.

o0o0O0o0o

"I like you Whitney," Ashton confessed four days after our last conversation. He hadn't been around the house since I'd lectured him.

I stalked out of the room.

o0o0O0o0o

Two days later and I found my mother inside her bedroom, bloodshot eyes and tissues in hand. I comforted her and we ate chocolate chip icecream while watching Gilmore Girls for the rest of the afternoon.

When I asked her about what happened she told me he'd just broke up with her, just out of nowhere and she told me she was heartbroken. She couldn't have been happier with him.

And I didn't think I could've felt any guiltier than I already did. I did call Ashton and berated him for his insensitiveness though. He said he felt sorry, and then he asked me to meet him in the park. That's when Ashton Cole kissed me for the third time.

A/: I know, this sucked but yea, so I wrote it and might as well just post it then.