15Miscommunication
Summary: In a severe case of miscommunication, Reese doesn't accept Derek's marriage proposal. Will it destroy their relationship, or will she get the chance to fix things?
Reese Taylor stared at her opponent over the top of her cards. With messy brown hair, piercing blue eyes, and a stubborn jaw, Blake O'Brien was formidable. His eyebrows were drawn together in concentration, apparently oblivious to Reese's silent appraisal. Having won the previous two hands, Blake was on the verge of securing the third, but Reese was determined not to let that happen. Despite Blake's six card advantage over her, Reese knew anything was possible; she wasn't about to roll over and give up without a fight. When Blake looked up suddenly and smiled, Reese frowned.
"What's that look for?" she asked warily. She didn't like the smug look on his face. Blake didn't say anything, though. Instead, he lifted one card out of the four he held in his hand and laid it down on the pile in between them. Reese groaned. "Draw Four, again?" She let her shoulders drop in defeat and reached out to pick up four cards from the deck, adding them to the ten she already held. "That is so not fair."
Blake smiled smugly. "That's the way the game is played."
"Yeah well, we'll see if you still feel like that once I've kicked your butt," she replied, laying down a Draw Two card with a triumphant, "Ha!" She followed that up with another Draw Two, a Skip, and a Draw Four. Now, she had the advantage of having one less card than him. It wasn't a huge difference, but it was enough for the time being. They played quietly and quickly, and soon, they were both down to two cards each.
Reese glanced at Blake and said, "I hope you know that if you win this, I'll be demanding a re-match."
"When I win, you mean," Blake replied grinning from ear to ear. Reese rolled her eyes and held her breath as she said, "UNO" and laid down a green five. Blake called "UNO" and then laid down a Wild Card and changed the colour to blue. Reese groaned and picked up a card from the deck – it was a blue two, and would be of no help to her in her quest to beat Blake. Sighing, she said, "UNO" and laid the card down. Blake cheered and put down his last card – a blue five.
"Right," Reese said, picking all the cards up. "You shuffle these while I check on the potatoes."
In the kitchen, Reese lifted the lid off of the pot in which the potatoes were softly boiling. She pricked each one with a fork, but they were still hard in the middle, so she covered them once more and returned to the dining table. Blake was staring off into space as he shuffled the deck of UNO cards. Reese sat back down in her seat and frowned at him. When he didn't seem to notice her, she waved a hand in front of his face.
"Earth to Blake," she sang, waving her hand back and forth. "Reese wants to let you know that she hopes you're prepared for a UNO smackdown."
Blake blinked and then looked at her. "What?"
"I think you mean 'pardon'," Reese corrected. Blake ducked his head and apologised. "That's okay. Everything alright?"
"Yeah, I was just..." he trailed off, looking down at the deck of cards.
"It's okay, you can tell me."
"It's just... Derek sounded really annoyed on the phone when you made me call him earlier."
"Oh." Reese pulled down the sleeves of her shirt until only the tips of her fingers were visible. "It's okay. I'll explain everything to him. He won't be mad with you for coming here."
"I just missed you," Blake said softly.
"I missed you, too."
"Do you think you and Derek will ever make up?"
Reese looked away. She had asked herself the same question many times over the last three weeks, but she still hadn't been able to come up with an answer. In her heart, she hoped so, but her head kept reminding her that Derek had been really hurt by her rejection, and she wasn't sure how much apologizing and groveling she'd need to do to make it up to him. How do you make things right when your answer to your boyfriend's proposal is "No"? Looking up, she found Blake watching her. At only fourteen years of age, Blake had become a huge part of Reese's life, and she hated not being able to see him every day. He was just as much family to her as he was to Derek.
"I honestly don't know, Blake," she replied. "I hope so, but it's complicated."
"He misses you, you know."
"No, I didn't know."
"Well he does. He won't admit it, but I know he does."
Reese smiled. "I miss him, too."
"Then why can't you guys just make up?" Blake asked. "Me and Derek fight all the time, but he still talks to me."
"Honey, it's not as simple as that." When Blake rolled his eyes and looked away, Reese sighed. "I know that that is such an adult excuse, but it's the truth. What happened between your brother and me is not something that he can just get over in a matter of days. I really hurt him, even though I didn't mean to."
"What did you do?"
Reese rubbed her forehead. "Blake, it's complicated..."
"I'm fourteen, Reese. I understand... things."
"I know you do," Reese said calmly, "but I don't know if your brother wants me telling you."
"Who cares what he wants? He's not here."
"I don't want to tell you."
Reese saw the walls go up around Blake immediately. "Oh," he said sullenly. "Fine. Whatever."
"Blake..."
"No, I don't care."
"You do care, and I love you for that, but some things are just too personal to talk about, you know?"
Blake shrugged his shoulders and began to deal out the cards. They played quietly, the cheering, cajoling and teasing from the previous rounds having been replaced by a tense silence that filled the air around them. Reese hated that Blake was feeling angry and hurt, but she just couldn't bring herself to explain the breakdown of her relationship with Derek to him. It was complicated, but more than that, it hurt to talk about it. To talk about Derek. She still loved him more than anything and she feared that that feeling would never go away.
Derek O'Brien was, without a doubt, The One for her, and she was grateful every day for having met him when she did. Not only had he been her boyfriend for four years, he had been her best friend, and she hated that she had lost both of them in the span of one night.
"You know, I don't really feel like playing anymore," Blake announced suddenly. "I think I'll just do my homework."
Reese nodded as she watched him cross the room to sit on the floor in front of the coffee table. He turned the television on and pulled out his books from his backpack. Sighing, Reese packed the cards away and went into the kitchen to finish preparing dinner. She glanced at the clock on the microwave. It was half-past six in the evening and Derek was due to arrive at her apartment within the next fifteen minutes. She was nervous. It had been three weeks since she had last seen or spoken to him; would he still be angry with her?
Of course he will be, she berated herself. You rejected his marriage proposal. What did you expect? That he'd jump up and down with joy that you said no?
Reese was not one to live with regrets, but she regretted the way she had handled that night so much that she often laid awake until early morning condemning herself for her stupidity. She had been so shocked at his proposal that she had just blurted out the first thing that came into her head. She should have taken a breath and explained why she couldn't accept. She could still see Derek's face in her mind whenever she closed her eyes. He had been hurt, confused and a little angry with her. Then, he had stood up calmly, and left her sitting by herself at the corner table in the restaurant where they had first met.
After that, she had called him multiple times every day for a week to try and explain, but he never picked up and he never returned her call. When that failed, she went to his apartment and to his office, but he refused to see her. She called him one last time about a week ago, but again, he didn't answer. So she left him a message saying that she was sorry she had hurt him, that she hadn't intended to, that she still loved him and wanted to be with him, but that she would respect his wish for her to keep her distance.
She didn't know whether he had actually listened to her entire message, but she hoped he had. She hoped he still knew how she felt about him, and she hoped that one day, he would be able to forgive her. She suspected that that was why Blake had turned up unexpectedly on her doorstep two hours ago. Either he really did miss her, or he was trying to force her and Derek together to finally sort out their problem.
The buzzing of her apartment's intercom brought her back to the present. She glanced at the microwave's clock again as she left the kitchen – twenty to six. He was five minutes early. He'd never been early anywhere in the years she'd known him. Did this mean he was eager to see her? Or anxious to get it over and done with?
She lifted the intercom's phone and stared at Derek on the screen. He didn't look into the security camera he knew was there. "Come on up, Derek," Reese said, pressing the lock key, and placing the phone back in its cradle. She went back to the kitchen and busied herself with dinner. She'd made enough for three in case Derek wanted to stay. She hoped he wanted to stay.
"Blake?" she called over to him. "Derek's on his way up."
Blake didn't even lift his head to acknowledge her.
A quick succession of taps on her door almost made her drop the pot of potatoes she was carrying over to the sink. Putting the pot down, she walked briskly to the door and opened it.
He was dressed in a suit minus the jacket. The sleeves of his shirt were unbuttoned and rolled up to his elbows. He had loosened his tie. Everything else about him looked perfectly in order; the way she remembered him.
She smiled. "Hi. Come in." She moved aside to let him in. As soon as he was inside, he made a beeline for Blake.
"Mind telling me what you're doing here, Blake?" he asked, staring down at him.
Blake shrugged.
"You're going to have to do better than that. What if Reese hadn't been here when you arrived? What would you have done? I mean, would you have even bothered to call me to let me know where you were if Reese hadn't made you?"
"Derek..." Reese began.
"I can handle this, Reese."
Well. That put her in her place.
"I wanted to see her, Derek," Blake said. "Just because you're mad at her doesn't mean I am."
"That's not the point, Blake. In case you've forgotten, it's just me and you, kid. How do you think I'd have felt if something bad had happened to you? You do not just go wandering around the city by yourself. Especially without telling me where you're going. "
"So you would have let me come here if I'd told you?" Blake asked.
Derek hesitated. It was only slightly, but it was enough.
"See! You wouldn't have. You don't care."
"I don't care about what?"
"You don't care that I miss her. She's..." Blake trailed off and glared at his books.
"She's what?" Derek pressed.
"She's the only mother I've ever known," Blake mumbled.
Reese felt her heart skip a beat. Oh, God. She'd had no idea Blake had looked to her as a mother figure. He'd never said anything – to her or Derek, by the sounds of it. No wonder he was so upset about the rift between Derek and herself.
She was just about to open her mouth to say something when Derek rounded on her, angry. "Did you put him up to this?"
Reese's eyes widened. "What? No! Of course not. How could you even..."
"Well how do you expect me to react to that?"
"I- I don't know, but accusing me of putting him up to it is ridiculous."
"She didn't put me up to anything, Derek." Blake rose from the floor and glared at his brother. "I can think for myself, you know."
"Clearly you can't seeing as how you wandered around the city, at night, all by yourself for God only knows how long."
Reese stepped between them and raised her hands. "How about we all calm down and have something to eat?"
Derek shook his head. "No. We're leaving."
Blake stood his ground. "I'm hungry. I'm staying."
Reese looked from one brother to the next. They looked so alike it was uncanny. If you didn't know their age difference, you'd probably mistake them for twins.
She turned her body towards Derek's and looked him in the eyes. "Derek," she said softly. His eyes travelled down to hers. "Stay for dinner. Please. For Blake's sake if... for no other reason."
He glanced at Blake. "Fine. We'll stay."
Reese smiled and left them to it. She kept an eye on them both from the kitchen as she finished preparing dinner. Blake had resumed his seat on the floor to do his homework while Derek sat on the couch and stared at the TV. She knew he wasn't watching it because he had a faraway look on his face; the same look he'd had the night he'd proposed to her.
Once she'd finished getting dinner ready and setting the table, she called the brothers over. Derek automatically pulled out her chair for her, but when she turned to smile up at him, he wasn't looking at her. With a sigh, she sat down, and began serving.
Dinner was a quiet affair. She tried to start several conversations, but after receiving only short answers in response, gave up. If the brothers wanted to sulk, she was going to let them.
Blake was the first to finish. He excused himself to finish his homework. Reese waited for Derek to finish his meal before she stood and cleared the table. Derek rose to help her, but she told him to sit down and relax. He seemed uncomfortable being in her apartment, so rather than sit, he went out onto her balcony, which had a beautiful view of the city and harbour. Once she had finished clearing the table and loading the dishwasher, she went out to join him.
"It's quiet," she commented. "It's weird. I've become accustomed to noise since moving in here."
She desperately wanted to reach out and touch Derek, but she held herself back. Doing so might do more harm than good.
"So how was work?"
"Are we really going to do this?" he said finally, turning to face her. "Be civil? Pretend nothing's happened?"
"I-"
"Because I'll tell you right now that I don't want to."
Reese took a deep breath. "What do you want?"
"Honestly? To leave. To take Blake and go home."
"Can you give me a chance to explain?" she pleaded.
"What's to explain? You don't want to marry me. I got the message the first time."
"That's not-" she shook her head and looked away. "God you are so frustrating."
"I'm frustrating?!"
"Yes, you are." She looked up at him, annoyed. "I have a perfectly good explanation for why I refused your proposal, but you're so damn pigheaded and stubborn, that you won't even hear me out."
He folded his arms across his chest and rested his hip against the balcony's railing. "Fine. Explain away."
Reese took several deep breaths. "Okay. Let me ask you something. Why did you ask me to marry you?"
"I would think that's fairly obvious."
"No, Derek, it's not. Did you ask me to marry you because you wanted to marry me, or did you ask me to marry you because you being you wanted to do right by me and the child that I'm carrying?"
"I-" He looked down at his feet with a frown. It was all Reese needed to know. He had done what she had suspected him of doing: proposed for the wrong reason.
When she had found out she was pregnant, she had been ecstatic. Thrilled. Overjoyed. She'd wanted nothing more than to start a family with Derek, and her wish was going to come true. And when she had told him of her pregnancy, she had assured him that things wouldn't be so different. That just because they were going to have a child, it didn't mean things had to change drastically. She had not been expecting to fall pregnant before getting married, but she wasn't unhappy that she had done so. She simply felt she and Derek were doing things a little differently to other couples. Some people got married first and had babies second. She was doing things a little backwards, but the outcome was going to be the same: a happy, healthy family and life with the man she loved.
But then Derek proposed and things changed.
Reese smiled and stared out over the city. "I love you, Derek. I think I always will. You've given me the best four years of my life and now, having your child, has made me the happiest woman on Earth. I've wanted nothing more than to start a family with you." She turned to him. He was looking at her thoughtfully. "But I'd rather not be in a relationship with you while raising this baby, than marry you for the wrong reason. And marrying you just so this baby will have a "proper" family is a wrong reason. You may not realise that now, but you will, eventually."
He looked shocked. "That's why you said no?"
She nodded. "That's why I said no."
A look crossed his face, before he turned away and stared out over the harbour. He was quiet for a long time. Reese wasn't sure what was going on inside his head, but she wished he'd say something. Anything.
Then, he smiled. "You know, most women would have jumped at my proposal." He turned his head to look at her. "I should have known you wouldn't."
"I'm not trying to make things harder, Derek. But I know you're not completely ready to get married, and I'd rather wait until you are. Even if it takes ten years."
"I'm not ready to be married, but I'm ready to be a father?"
"Before I told you about the baby, had you ever entertained thoughts of proposing to me?"
"No, I hadn't," he replied honestly.
"So then why would you propose? We don't have to be married in order to raise this child. We don't have to be married in order to give it a healthy, loving home. We just have to be together and to love one another and to agree that our number one priority from here on out is to ensure that this child grows up to be just that – healthy and loved."
"And what about the benefits of being married? Things like health insurance?"
Reese shook her head. "Would you listen to yourself? You're talking about marriage like it's a contract."
"Well, technically..."
"Don't," she warned, glaring at him. "It might have been once, but it's not anymore. It's an agreement to spend the rest of your life with someone, to love, support and respect them until the day you die. You don't make a pro/con list before you ask someone to marry you. You just know whether it's the right thing to do or not."
"So what are you saying? You don't want to get married, but you want to officially move in together and raise this baby together? Like a family?"
"No," Reese said, shaking her head slowly. She stepped up to him. "I don't want to get married until you're ready."
"And what if I told you that I am ready?" Derek asked softly, turning his body to face her.
"Then I'd say let's get married tomorrow."
Derek slid his arms around Reese's waist and pulled her against his body. She'd missed being held in his arms; it had always made her feel safe and steady. When he lowered his head to brush his mouth across hers, she practically melted into him. She pulled away. She didn't want to do this if he was just going to leave her again.
"Derek..."
"You were right," he said, stopping her before she could continue. "You were right. I did propose for the wrong reason. My Dad – he raised me to always do right by the women in my life, so when you told me you were pregnant, I heard his voice in the back of my mind telling me that I had to propose. But I shouldn't have. I've been angry and upset with you for the last three weeks, but the funny thing is... I realised that I do want to marry you. Not because you're pregnant; because I love you. Because I love the idea of being able to call you wife, and of hearing you call me husband. Because I love the idea that at the end of every single day, I'll be going home to my lover and my best friend; someone who listens to me when I need to vent, who puts me in my place when I'm being a jerk, who isn't afraid to tell me to shut up. Someone who knows everything about me, and whom I know everything about. You're that person for me." He ran his thumb over her cheekbone, tucking her hair behind her ear. "I thought you said no because you didn't think I was marriage material or something. Or that you didn't love me. All those times you called me, were trying to see me, I thought it was just about you wanting to make yourself feel better. I didn't... What did you call me? Pigheaded and stubborn?" he smiled down at her. "See? You do know me."
"I'm sorry I hurt you," Reese said.
"I'm sorry I hurt you."
"So now what?" Reese asked.
"Now you pack some things, we take Blake home, we get some sleep, and in the morning, we'll talk wedding plans."
"I was serious, you know," Reese said. "I'd marry you tomorrow."
"What? Big, fancy weddings aren't to your taste?"
"Oh, they are. I just don't think I can wait that long."
"Well okay then. Tomorrow it is." He leaned down to kiss her hard on the mouth.
Blake leaned back from the coffee table, tilting his head back and to the side. He glanced outside and watched as Derek gathered Reese into his arms and kissed her.
"Blake, one. Derek and Reese, zero," he said softly.
Then, with a smirk, he sat up and resumed his homework.
Fin
AN: I was going through some files on my computer and found this! I'd completely forgotten that I'd written it, but since it was finished, I thought I'd better post it. Not too sure how I feel about it, but reviews, as always, are appreciated! :)