ME WITHOUT YOU

" I might be leaving for Melbourne in January or at the end of year 10" she says in a disinterested tone, as if it were nothing.

"B-b-but y-you c-can't" I said as I forced my tears back. She couldn't leave! not yet! We were supposed to finish school together and travel the world afterwards! She was supposed to slap me whenever I fight with guys like always. How can she do that from Melbourne?!

She can't leave!

I need her!

How can I protect her from things when she doesn't even live in Sydney anymore?

I can't do anything without her!

"Do you have to go?" I asked desperately, hoping she would stay.

"Even if I said no my mum would drag me" she replied without taking her eyes off the mac.

Ugh, she was reading fanfiction again.

Doesn't she care that she's leaving?

Or is it that she doesn't care that she's leaving me?

No, I can't think like that. I'm going to spend every moment I can with her before..before..before she leaves. I just sat there as I thought, she never noticed. She kept reading, we sat in total silence, which was a good thing considering we were in the school library. When the librarians rang the bell (they use it ten minutes before the actual school bell) we got up and left. It was awkward but if I want to spend time with her im going to have to 'deal with it'. I tried my best to come up with a conversation but instead I came up with "why?" instead. I wanted to take it back, just take back the thought but I knew I couldn't. Even though this was what I wanted to know I knew better than to ask. It would hurt her to speak about it, even though she pretends it doesn't. I watched as she went and sat on the stairs leading up to her locker. She was looking at her hands, not moving, not blinking, not doing anything.

God, it hurt so much to see her like that. I wonder what she's thinking about...

Will she visit me? would she call me when she's in trouble? will she even consider calling me to tell me how she feels? or will she just sit there and pretend that this is all a bad dream? would she hide something from me cause she thinks that I don't care? or would she tell me anyway?

This is too confusing. I thought as I watched her stare at a random spot.

- A COUPLE OF DAYS LATER -

It was your last day at school today. I was miserable, I tried my best to seem happy...for you. You couldn't stop smiling, you were having the time of your life especially considering all the drama today, so im wondering why are you so anxious to leave? or is that just me? I wish you would stay but that would be selfish of me especially since your so set on leaving and having a new start in a new place...without me.

The night on your last day was one of the best I've had in my life. Dinner, games, getting kicked out of a cafe while you laughed and the photos, those were something I could never forget. Or you.

On friday morning you were leaving, I ran to catch up to you and I hugged you as hard as I could and cried in your hair.

At 9:25 am you left, I cried, you didn't. You smiled, you laughed, but you didn't cry. You were happy I wasn't. You left I watched. You waved, I hugged you. The plane left with you on it. What you didn't know was that I had hoped you would decide to stay...with me.

The funny thing is, is the fact that this isn't a story, this is my life.

O – O - ME WITHOUT YOU – O - O

A/N This happened, to me, my best friend Jackie left today on the 5/11/10.

All I have left to say is...I LOVE YOU JACKIE! don't replace me too quick :'(

Guys if this doesnt make sense please tell me and i'll fix it. I don't want to read it again right now or i wont stop crying, and i really dont want to drown anyone yet...