How I Study

I sit

Numb

Eyes open wide

Quivering shaking warm

Reaching forward

Fingers skimming the edges

I am afraid

I am nervous

Carefully I lift it up

Heavy against my palm

I put it back down but not without

Opening it up and glazing

Over at the beauty it illuminates

It blurs together

I look away

Daunting I grab my pen

Soon the beauty of the page is erased

Tainted by my childishness

I give up

I'll start again

Later