Hidden Intentions


I want to crush every single one of your bones. I want to rip out all your organs. I want to tear apart all of your limbs. But even by doing that, you still won't be able to feel even O.O1% of what the hell I am feeling now. Actually you NEVER will be able to feel what I am feeling now. Every single emotion there is, I can sense every one of them. I feel like I've been hit by a truck with my heart being ripped out of my body.
I feel so lost and alone now. I don't like this feeling at all. It makes me feel so weak and I am so drained out now. Emotionally drained out that the tears now refuse to stream down my face. But you won't ever see that will you?
I thought you understood me. Least that's what you made it seem like. But my mistake for thinking you did. I guess you won't ever be able to understand me or you just don't want to.
Tell me this; was I wrong to trust you with my life? Did you intend this from the beginning? To make me feel this way? Actually do you know how you make me feel? Let me tell you. Worthless. Like I mean nothing. Like I'm just there to pass time.
Let me tell you this, I'm not some freaking toy you can play with whenever you want and just expect there to be for you no matter what. I'm getting sick, tired and fed up of all this. I've kept everything in me for far too long and one more wrong turn and I know I am going to explode. I've tried to remain calm but it's doing me no good now. I want to scream and shout because I don't know what you're about anymore.
You promised you'd be there for me and you wouldn't let no harm come to me. But you lied. Yet I was stupid and naive enough to believe every single word that came out your mouth. My mistake.
I hate you for what you've done to me, made me turn into someone I vowed never to be. I'm no longer proud of myself and heck, I don't even recognise the girl in the mirror anymore. I don't get it. I really don't. I have done every single thing you asked of me yet you don't seem to realise it. It's like no matter what I do, you're not happy. I mean how much more do I have to do to prove it to you? I feel like all my efforts are just going to waste here. I try so hard, so freaking hard yet I seem to fail at everything.
You know what? I give up. I absolutely give up. No matter what I do, I know I'll never win against you. So what's the point of holding on anymore. Its not like I have anything left to live for anymore.
Just so you know, you're the one that pushed to this. I don't need this anymore. Maybe one day you'll realise just how much it all affected me. Though by then it will be too late. Far too late.

Nobody can stop me now. Nobody. It's time to bid goodbye...

The paper slowly fell to the floor, as the eyes locked into each other. What was the meaning of this? How had things got this bad? Had everyone been so wrapped up in their own world that they couldn't see what was going on anymore?

The silent tears from these eyes slowly made their way down these faces, causing a small splash as it hit on the ground. One tear after another, any form of sound muted from the lips, each breath taken with a lot of effort.

The pair of eyes then glared into the figure in front, with one arm flying across the soft smooth skin, turning into a burning red. One hit, one punch, one kick, simultaneously coming one after another, till there was a bright red pool around, getting deeper. But the work was far from done and nothing could be done to protect just yet. Another blow coming from the other side, till the skin had gone the same dark shade as the other cheek.

Every move proved to be done in the greatest pain. Still far from help, the best thing to do was to just sit there, gritted teeth and try not to feel anything. Any sudden movement, another blow would hit. This time more with more aggression and force than the first.

The eyes darted around, making sure that there was nobody or nothing there to come in the way. Once the coast was clear, another few blows were hit, left, right and centre. Screams echoed all around. Anything to just make this pain go away. Anything.

But no matter what, the pain wouldn't ever be able to go away would it? Not when the constant reminder would always be there. It would just be a constant battle of trying to forget when things could have been a whole lot more different. Could've, should've, would've. Too little too late.

This time, the arms aggressively took hold of the body, yanking hard from the floor and violently shook till the eyes rolled back in and the lids slowly came to a close. A slow, careful and quick punch to the mouth, cutting the top lip open as the red slowly oozed out, covering the bottom lip and then slowly but surely making a trail down the now limp body. A few blows to the cheeks, then nose and finally on the forehead, saw the sea of red, gushing violently, till the features of the face were almost no longer there.

Just as the body was thrown onto the hard cold stoned ground, an another arm appeared, grabbing the limbs of the waking body and pulled it back.

"Doing this isn't going to bring her back you know!"

"No. But this is all YOUR fault."

The words spat out with great force, with a final kick...

They say love is either the greatest thing you will ever experience or the worst thing out there. It either makes you or breaks you. It depends on how you handle certain situations and just how far you're willing to go to make a compromise on things. You will either find yourself better than before or totally lose yourself till you can't recognise your own reflection anymore. It will make you do crazy things to be with that one person who means the world to you. You want them to be proud of you and show you off to the rest of the world. Cherish you and love you like no other. Love can consume you into a whole new world, making you feel on such a high, without a care in the world.

Love. The most powerful yet dangerous tool out there...