Time you try.
Author's note: Alright, I have been meaning to do this for a while. Its the start of a series of poems concerning how I struggle with Asperger's Syndrome (a form of autism). This particular poem is more aimed at those who are not autistic and tries to get you to try to understand and was written against the backdrop of my own family not trying to understand. I cannot stress how angry I am but that thus I tried not to focus on that in this piece. Enjoy!
Edit 02/Jan/2014: So, when I was reviewing this, I was struck by how little rhythm there was. I decided to play on that. I hope that it worked on some level. I was trying to convey both the anger, and the confusion in this piece by messing with the structure. Let me know how I did in the Review section!
You ask a lot, you demand more.
You expect perfection,
but I acknowledge my flaws.
But, I drink them - for strength.
My friend, my mother, my father,
I love you all dearly.
I need you all in my life, for love
I want to change, to see your pride.
I lack the strength to keep changing,
I cannot be perfect.
But I try to climb that mountain,
I gasp for your care and joy
Its time I expect the same back.
Its time for you to change.
You should wear the straight-jacket now
My mood, my walk, my mannerism.
My choice, my responses,
Can you not understand? These things
change like the mountains.
Are you biblically blind...
You are all too demanding.
I am untidy, my room's a tip. I can't have it pristine like you want.
I am blunt, I say exactly what I think.
No matter the cost.
But how many of you have fought
the urge to mess things up?
A curse to be untidy, and the
Jinx of being comfy.
My flaw. You have caused it.
You tell me I can be different
You say you love my truth,
You tell me that "honesty is the best policy".
Then you call them my flaws?
Have any of you ever looked in a mirror?
Have any of you seen your own flaws?
I am sure you have.
You are too tidy, I cannot feel comfortable in your houses.
You are too discreet, I cannot see what you mean.
You are too quick to judge, you don't give me a chance
I care little if I offend you, I care not if you disagree.
You need to hear this and to hear it you will.
None of you can understand why I do things the way I do.
But by the same token, you never try.
You do nothing…and expect me to accept your flaws.
And you never accept mine.
Its time you did.
Its time you grow, as I did.
I have not the strength to tell you this in any other way.
I have not the strength to keep on growing.
All I ask is a break.