A/N: this is an old story i found just recently! I don't know if its any good, so please leave reviews or comments! anythings welcome, of course except trolling, insulting, and flaming. :) thanks again, and if you like it, i have more chapters written and ready!

Sirens sound in the distance.


Yes. Definitely sirens, I thought.

Why is everything dark? Oh, duh. I opened my eyes. It took a few seconds for my hazy sight to focus. When it did, I wish I could take back, forget, anything, about what I saw.

First off, everything was upside down.


The last thing I remember was that Nick and me had been waiting…at a red light. He started to go…someone ran the light…then…

Wait! Nick!

My eyes shot open, sending pain through my whole body. My eyes watered, but I ignored the pain. Slowly but surely I turned my head against the flowering splinters of pain throughout my body and I saw that familiar face.

Nick sat next to me, pressed against the hood of the car. His seat belt must've broken, because I was still held, upside down, blood rushing to my face, against my seat. But nick. He looked like he'd gone through a cyclone. Cuts and bruises that were already turning deep shades of purple littered his face and arms. Blood ran down his neck. I probably looked no better.


That one word cut through the silence. My voice was barely audible, scratchy and hoarse too. I tried again.

"Nick!" this time, my voice came through.

But he didn't respond.

Looking at Nicks' face, he looked dead. He lay still, cut and bleeding.


My Nick.

He couldn't be…can't be…


4 months earlier…

"Beep! Beep! Bee-"

Dumb alarm clock.

Moaning into my pillow, I pulled the covers up over my head, turning my vision dark. I'm so not ready for school. Groaning, I threw the sheets off of me in a heap, crawling out of bed after another good ten minutes had passed.

But then Nick popped into my head.

My face was taken over by the huge smile that broke across it. Nick. My secret crush…

A warm heat encased my face as I thought about him. Like he would even return the feelings I have for him. Why?

Maybe because he was the star quarterback on our high school football team? Or that he's perfectly gorgeous, with a perfectly gorgeous body? But the biggest reason he'd never like me back…was because we're both guys.


Both. Guys.

My smile faded. I shook my head. I got up and headed into the bathroom just a couple feet away, wearing only my boxers. A yawn escaped as I entered the little room.

I'm lucky just to know him, I continued thinking. I've known him for four years, but I was too scared to tell him how I feel, afraid of the outcome.

I slid the shower curtain aside and adjusted the nosel as the water poured into the tub.

I mean, we're only a couple months apart in age, and in the twelfth grade. Only difference is that he's well built, a good two feet taller than me, and lost likely not gay.

Once the water temp was just right, I pulled the nosel up, and water exploded out from the showerhead. Sliding my boxers off, I jumped into the shower. At first the water was chilling, and goose bumps spread across my skin. A few seconds later, it warmed up a bit.

But I still liked him. The way he looks at you with those bright intelligent blue eyes and that sincere smile. He was the kindest person you'd ever meet, so everyone loved him. He's had so many girlfriends now that I've stopped counting.

It made me sad, seeing him with other girls or his friends. Knowing that I would never be with him. It was just plain impossible, right?

I shook head again, causing water to fly all over the shower curtain.

But at least he was happy.

After my twenty-minute shower, I turned the water off and stepped out to dry myself. Pools of water formed under my bare feet. The mirrors had fogged up, so I wiped away just enough with the side of my hand to see my face.

I hated what I saw.

A mop of light brunette hair, still wet, came down just above my eyes, which were also a shade of brown. I had an Ok face, with a normal sized nose, no obnoxious zits or anything like that, and a slim jaw line.

Why couldn't I have had blue eyes or blonde hair? Or something to get Nick to notice me.

Sighing, I finished drying off, careful to avoid my bellybutton piercing. I'd pierced it myself two weeks ago, un-beknownst to my father. It was a simple hook with two silver balls on each end.

Then, randomly picking out a t-shirt and jeans, I got dressed and headed down stairs to eat breakfast with my dad.


Trotting down the stairs, I turned into the kitchen, thinking about what I'm gonna have for breakfast.

The first thing I saw when I entered the small room was my father. He was sitting at the table, newspaper in hands, and a plate of toast with jam half bitten into. The second thing I saw was a bowl of cereal across from him.

"Morning, dad." I said as I sat down in the spot where the cereal was. "This for me?" Before he could even answer I slid the bowl in front of and began spooning the food down.

Without even looking up from his paper, he said, "Yes. Figured you'd take a while getting ready so I just thought I'd pour a bowl for you. Seeing as you're already helping yourself to it, I'd say you were planning on having that today?"

"Yup." I replied, my mouth full of chewed up cereal. My father raised his eyebrow as he looked up at me finally.

My father was in his late thirties, the barest hint of grey in his hair. The begginings of a beard lined his jaw. He looked professional in his suit and tie getup. His job was head manager at Murakawa Publishing Company, where he publishes all kinds of novels and mangas. And that's exactly why he didn't know I was gay.

My dad was the kind of who just wouldn't except that his son was messed up. It's not like we didn't get along, it was just hard to talk to him about anything other than work and school.

"So is there a reason you're being so fatherly today?" I asked, totally serious.

"Why would you think that?" he asked, shocked.

"Well? The only time you ever make spare time is just to ell me you're going on some business trip."

A look of surrender crossed his face. "You're right. Tomorrow I'll be leaving for Europe to meet up with the Bureau to discuss sales for this years new authors."

Keeping my tone free of emotion, my face like-wise, I asked, "So how long will this trip be?"

I've asked that question so many times now.

"A month at least." He said.

Inside, I felt myself sink. Sure, I was old enough to take care of myself; I had a job, a car. But every time he left for one of his trips, I couldn't help but feel a little alone.

"I'm sorry, son."

"It's fine." A lie. "It's your job. I'll be fine without you. I mean, I'll be graduating in a couple months. You don't have to worry." I regretted what I said the instant I saw the look on his face.

"I understand." Was all he said before looking down at his newspaper again. "By the way, you're going to be late for school."

I looked down at my wristwatch, only to see that he was right.

"Oh crap!" I sprang from my chair, dashing for my keys on the counter along with my old green backpack, swinging it over my shoulder. "See ya later dad!" I hollered over my shoulder.

As I turned into the hallway, a hand stopped me. I turned and looked. It was my dad.

"What? I have to go." I snapped.

"It's just…" he seemed at a loss for words for once.

"What?" I asked in a gentler voice.

He sighed. "I love you Rei. Have…have a good day." He said.

I was socked. He never called me by my name. He always calls me son. This was something new.

"Right." Was all I could manage to say. "You too." The next thing I knew, I was already running out the door and off into my car.

This was definitely new. Something had to be up with my dad.

Before I allowed my thoughts to go any further, I left the driveway in my old Volks Wagen red slug bug and headed for school.

And Nick.