we fell out of line the day I decided
to envision an outline,
a perfect silhouette.
and i built it up too narrow
with only my best intentions
only to resolve that I would not fit inside.

and for a while I lived like a homeless person,
a shapeless apparition,
unaccepting of her home called body.

i swear I wanted to kiss you
i wanted to kiss until our lips cracked red and we both were crying
i wanted to kiss you until I kissed the life straight out of you
so I could know how it felt to belong to oneself
so I could occupy my space called body-
to catch up to the outline which evaded me.