53A/N: Umm... heyyy guysssss, been a while, huh? Like six or seven months. Um. Sorry? I honestly didn't mean for there to be such a long gap between updates :P Life just kind of gets in the way sometimes. As it is, I might try to go ahead and finish this story, along with Slow Burn, before I do anything else. This means a lot of my things are on hold at the moment, including Almost Dying and When Life Gives You Lemons. Sorry. I'm also working on some new ideas based on an rp my friend and I did a while ago :) So there's that! I will try to get the next chapter of this up soon.
This chapter was kind of hard to write because of the content in the beginning. See, that's stuff that takes place during Carnage, the 5th Tasteful book, but none of you know anything about that yet because I'm still kinda sorta working on Monster... kind of. So, yeah. I tried to keep it kind of vague-ish but also not really that vague... if that makes sense. Gah. Achem, anywho.
Oh, and in case you didn't notice, I finally changed the name of this story :P It is now entitled Altered and will keep this name unless I randomly decide to change it again. So, yeah. Sorry again for the delay! And thank you all so much for the reviews! They honestly got me back into this, made me want to write on it again :) Thank you!
Chapter length: 3149
Onward!
Chapter Twelve: Together
~Taylor's POV~
Corbin took them to the room they'd been in earlier. On the table sat a pile of papers, and their boss picked up the top ones, showing them to Lo. Taylor recognized it as a snapshot of the ultrasound from a few days ago, when Taylor finally learned Corbin was telling the truth and he was actually pregnant.
He was still trying to come to terms with it. He was going to be a father. So was Lo, whether he decided to stay with Taylor or not. He would still be the kid's biological father.
Currently, Lo stared at the picture. "What's…?"
"You are looking at your baby's heartbeat," Corbin said, and Lo sucked in a quick sharp breath. Lo's emotions were still too conflicted for Taylor to easily make out and he carefully put his wall back up. "You can deny this all you want, Logan, but Taylor is pregnant. Neither of us are lying to you."
"But it's not possible," Lo said.
Corbin shook his head, sighing. "It is, actually. Taylor is not entirely human. While his 'monster side' is still a mystery to us, I believe it is why he is pregnant. The doctors misdiagnosed him because it is, of course, unheard of for men to become pregnant, but my tests do not lie." He waved that paper in front of the blonde's face. "This ultrasound doesn't lie."
"Don't worry, Lo," Taylor said quickly, causing the blonde to look at him, blue eyes wide. "You don't have to stay with me."
"Not this again," Lo sighed, narrowing his eyes at him. "You're not getting rid of me, T."
Those words meant more to Taylor than the blonde could ever possibly know. Warmth spread through him and this big, dumb smile crossed his face. He had this sudden urge to pull Lo close and kiss him but he fought it off because there was no way they were going to do that in front of their boss. Not only would Lo never go for that but the thought of it happening was just embarrassing, even to Taylor.
"I am happy you decided to stay with him," Corbin said, dragging their attention back to him. He put the paper back down with the others. "Taylor is going to need your love and support through this, Logan."
Taylor scowled, feeling his ears burn somewhat. "Okay, so, what happened with Lo downstairs? And what happened to you?"
Corbin looked fine one moment and then Taylor got the sense their boss was actually going to hit him. Lo moved quickly, though, tackling the man to the ground, and then Corbin was fine again. That needed explaining, as well as the fact Lo seemed utterly confused after it was over, like he didn't even realize he'd tackled their boss until after the fact.
"I was merely proving a point," Corbin said. "I projected danger and you both responded accordingly."
"What?" Lo asked, frowning from where he stood move to the side, leaning his back against the wall, arms folded across his chest.
"Taylor behaved fearfully, taking a step back. You, Logan, responded as though I were a threat."
"You're not," Taylor said. "Why would you project such a thing?"
It made no sense. Did Corbin want Lo to attack him?
Lo was strong, easily able to knock a man out cold with one solid punch despite his appearance. He looked strong enough, physically, with skin stretched across muscles, but they weren't overly prominent or anything. It just looked like he was in decent shape and good physical health. A lot of people underestimated him due to this, assuming he was weaker, especially if the person in question was bigger than him. With his heritage, though, and his dog DNA, he was physically stronger than most of the others.
So why, then, would Corbin provoke him like that?
"I was proving a point."
"So you've said," Taylor sighed. "What's that supposed to mean?"
"Logan's heritage comes into play here."
Taylor didn't have to be looking at the blonde to know his expression darkened, eyes narrowed. Anger was sharp, bitter and spicy, chili peppers in his mouth. Lo was not on good speaking terms with his family, and that was putting it lightly.
Once upon a time Taylor thought they could work things out and that Lo was overreacting when he said he hated his family. After all, they helped create the man he was today, the good and the bad. Lo wouldn't be himself without them. Taylor didn't even hate his 'father' even though the man was a drunken asshole. But then he met Lo's family, learned their twisted traditions and ways, and tasted for himself those betrayed, raw and angry emotions from Lo.
Lo's father was less than pleased at Taylor's presence. That was putting it mildly. Things escalated from there and even though a tentative truce was reached in the end, Lo still didn't like them, probably still hated them, but at least they had an understanding now.
Even so, it was a touchy subject for the blonde.
"How's it come into play?" Taylor asked, rolling his tongue across his teeth in an effort to wash away that foul taste.
"Logan, your kind are very protective of their mates."
"Mates?" Taylor frowned. "I'm not his mate. I'm his boyfriend."
"And yet the bond is still the same," Corbin said. "It might have come about differently than with his family but in the end, you are his mate and you two are tied together." His gaze slid toward Lo, who was eerily silent throughout all of this. "You remember how you felt when you were hunting Queran, I'm sure."
This time Taylor saw the scowl, tasted those emotions all rolled into a bittersweet, angry concoction. Taylor himself scowled because he knew what Corbin was talking about.
"I still can't believe you let him think I was dead," he muttered, shaking his head.
That was a pretty cruel thing to do, after all. He could only imagine how it would have been if their roles were reversed, with Lo presumably dead and Taylor very much alive, stuck in that mindset for days. He would hate it, wouldn't be able to take it. He'd surrendered to Red, his torturer, in an effort to save Lo's life, after all.
Not only had Lo been under the impression Taylor was dead for a few days, but he'd also been sick, having checked out of the hospital AMA. When Taylor finally made it back to the apartment after having woken here, at the library, the blonde had been out of his mind with a fever due to the pain and infection of his still-healing wounds. It took a long time before Lo realized Taylor was actually there and wasn't simply an illusion.
If he doubted Lo's love for him before, he certainly didn't after that. After those tastes. That look on Lo's face, the way he wouldn't let the emotion taster out of his sight for a while after that.
And yet Corbin let the blonde think he was dead.
"Logan did not really give me time to explain," their boss said, dragging him back to the present.
"Bullshit," Lo snapped, finally speaking up. "There was fucking time."
Corbin's sigh wasn't angry, irritated or even patient. "Things were complicated, Logan. Besides, we cannot change the past now. That is not why I brought this up anyway."
"Then why?" Taylor asked.
"I was merely attempting to help explain the bond between the two of you. It has been there for a while now, but you both have not seen it clearly. These bonds are important, especially when the female is pregnant."
"I'm not a girl!" Taylor snapped, irritated that he kept being called the 'mom'. Sure, he was carrying the kid, but he was a man, dammit! He was going to be a father, not a mother.
"I know, Taylor," Corbin said calmly. "It is just how the bond is perceiving you are the moment. That is why Logan reacted as he did when you stepped back and I stepped toward you."
"So… he tackled you because we share a bond?"
That made no sense.
"In a way," Corbin said with a nod. "Logan reacted as he did because his mate was in trouble, so to speak. He reacted accordingly."
"This is ridiculous," Lo said, causing Taylor to glance at him. "I know you're not going to hurt him."
"A part of you knows that," Corbin agreed. "Another part is less convinced. It is why you reacted defensively when I try to talk to Taylor alone. It is completely natural for once such as yourself."
"One such as myself?" Lo echoed, eyes narrowed. "I'm a freak and you know it."
"Lo," Taylor growled, narrowing his eyes at the blonde. "You're not a freak! You were born this way; it's natural. If anyone's the freak it's me for getting pregnant."
It still seemed so surreal, being pregnant.
Now Lo was glaring at him.
"Be calm," Corbin cut in, causing them both to glance at him. "Logan, this is simply a part of who you are. Anyway, this is not about you, but about Taylor and the baby." His gaze focused on Taylor. "What do you wish to do?"
Taylor swallowed thickly, hesitating as Lo glanced at him, clearly interested in his answer. He sighed and scrubbed a hand over his face, shaking his head. "I don't know," he murmured. "I just…" His gaze slid briefly toward Lo and then back toward the ground. "I don't know."
"Well, you need to be deciding quickly," Corbin said.
"I know."
"So he's really pregnant?"
"Yes, Logan," Corbin said calmly, watching the blonde while Taylor shifted somewhat uneasily. "He is really pregnant and you are really a father. Why don't the two of you return home and decide where to go from there? I will wait here for your decision."
Taylor nodded slowly even as a part of him dreaded being alone with Lo at the moment. What would the blonde say? Would he be angry? Disgusted? Would he want nothing to do with him anymore? But he had to do this, had to face this. The sooner the better, after all. He could only prolong it for so long.
He didn't look at Lo as he led the way out of the room. Didn't look at him as they left the library and climbed into the car. Focused entirely out the passenger window the whole drive back to the apartment. He would have kept going, only watching the ground as they climbed the stairs to the correct floor, but as soon as they entered their apartment, door closing quietly behind them, Lo growled and snagged his wrist, pulling him to a halt.
"Talk to me," he said.
Taylor remained quiet, lightly trying to pull free of Lo's grip but those fingers only tightened around his wrist, pulling him back another step.
"Look at me, T."
"Lo…"
"Look at me."
Taylor took in a slow breath and turned, finally dragging his gaze from the floor to look at the blonde. Dark blue eyes watched his every move, but there wasn't anger on his face, or disgust. In fact, as he cautiously lowered a bit of his wall, he tasted the sweet tang of curiosity, bittersweet concern, and even a touch of that light, fluttery sensation against his taste buds. He rolled his tongue along the roof of his mouth, carefully lowering his wall a little more.
"You're not… mad?"
"Why would I be mad?" Lo asked, frowning at him.
"Because I… I'm pregnant, Lo," he said quietly, and it was still a shock to hear himself say those words aloud because how was this possible? "You didn't ask for this."
"Neither did you," the blonde pointed out.
Taylor swallowed. "Yeah, but… but you don't have to stay, Lo. I know you…" He took in a breath. "I know you don't want kids."
"I never said that," Lo said.
The emotion taster frowned at him. "What?"
"I never said I didn't want kids."
"You said-"
"I said it wasn't really my thing," the blonde finished for him. "I just… don't think I'd make a great dad, you know? But… you're pregnant. I can't believe I just said that, but you're pregnant, and…"
"Lo…"
"And I'm not going anywhere," Lo said quietly, watching him, grip still firm on his wrist. "We'll get through this together, like always."
"Together?" Taylor breathed.
Those fingers squeezed in their grip. "Yes, T. Together."
~Lo's POV~
I'm going to be a dad.
It still didn't quite seem real to him. And yet somehow it all made sense – the mood swings, the nausea, how he was hungry one minute and then wasn't the next…
Lo didn't know much about pregnancy but he figured the usual rules didn't really apply here. Taylor wasn't female, and technically wasn't entirely human, which was how this was possible in the first place. It was still hard to wrap his head around but he meant what he said; he wasn't going anywhere. They'd get through this together.
At least now he knew Taylor really didn't have cancer. He wasn't sick, exactly, just… pregnant. Which was a lot better, right? At least it meant the emotion taster wasn't going to be dying anytime soon.
Right?
Suddenly he wasn't so sure.
Was it safe for Taylor to be pregnant? Already he kept getting sick, passing out, he was barely eating…
Didn't the symptoms get worse the further along someone was in their pregnancy?
He wasn't aware he'd tightened his hold on the emotion taster until Taylor sighed into his chest, buried into his side, and opened his eyes. Lo glanced down at him. "Sorry."
"What's wrong?"
Goddamn emotion tasting abilities.
"Nothing. Go back to sleep."
"Lo…"
"We'll talk in the morning," Lo assured him, sighing. It was late, after all, probably around one in the morning. They were supposed to be sleeping. Taylor slept a lot lately but Lo was finding he was sleeping less and less the longer this stuff went on. He was tired at the moment but even so, those thoughts nagged at him and refused to leave him alone.
"Lo…"
"In the morning."
~Taylor's POV~
"So… what was that about last night?" Taylor asked while the two ate breakfast, two small bowls of cereal. Thus far he didn't feel the sudden urge to vomit so he took that as a good sign. Maybe he was past that stage; he certainly hoped so.
Lo scowled, pushing his cereal around in his bowl. "Nothing."
"Lo. C'mon, talk to me."
Was he having second thoughts?
A knot formed in his stomach.
Perhaps the blonde realized what it meant, knowing Taylor was pregnant. A kid would be involved. They could keep it or put it up for adoption. Corbin would make sure it found a nice home, Taylor knew that much, but while that could be taken care of for the long run, for the time being Lo had to put up with Taylor. He said they'd get through this together… but he could easily change his mind.
Maybe he came to the realization that Taylor wasn't worth it. Taylor certainly wouldn't blame him. Lo never signed up for any of this, after all. He'd never force the blonde to stay.
"You can… You can go if you want," he said quietly, staring down at his empty bowl, only the white outline of milk remaining. Absently, he realized this was probably the first thing he'd completely finished eating without suddenly vomiting in a while now.
"Stop it. Look at me."
Taylor sighed and lifted his gaze, focusing on the blonde, careful to keep his wall up. He could handle whatever Lo said as long as he didn't have to taste it. Taste the regret and-
"I'm not going anywhere."
"Lo…?"
"I just…" Hesitation crossed the blonde's face. "Is it safe…?"
"Is what safe?"
"Is it safe for you to be pregnant?"
Taylor frowned, as he'd never really thought about it before. "I think so? I don't think Corbin would let this continue if it wasn't safe."
Lo's shoulders slumped somewhat. "Yeah. I guess. How are you supposed to have this kid?"
"What?"
"You don't have the female parts," Lo said, face scrunching up somewhat. "How are you supposed to… give birth? Or whatever."
"I… I don't know," Taylor sighed, shaking his head. "We'll cross that bridge when we come to it."
"I don't want you doing this if it's not safe."
Taylor blinked at the honesty in those words, at the way those blue eyes locked onto his own golden ones. "Lo…"
"If it's going to hurt you or… Then I want you to get rid of it."
"You want me to… get an abortion?" Taylor asked, mostly to clarify, watching the blonde, unable to look away as Lo's gaze held his own.
"If it's going to hurt you," Lo said, nodding. "Then, yes."
"But… Lo-"
"Look, dammit, I don't know that kid," Lo snapped, eyes narrowing, irritation spreading across his features, seeping into Taylor's mouth, leaving him snapping his mouth shut. "I'll be a dad if it's safe but I don't know that damn kid. I know you, okay, and call me fucking selfish but I'd rather keep you."
The sincerity in those words, as well as their meaning, left a lump forming in Taylor's throat, his mouth going dry, tongue sticking to the roof of his mouth. For a long moment, he stared at the blonde, Lo glaring back at him, daring him to argue with him but Taylor had no idea what to say, and no voice to say it with at the moment.
"Do you understand?" Lo finally asked after a few minutes of silence.
Taylor could only manage a quick, small nod, still unable to correctly form sounds and words at the moment. He was still trying to get over the fact that Lo just said those words, because the blonde wasn't emotional or romantic in really any way, and Taylor never expected him to be. But those words, their meaning…
"Say something."
Taylor took in a slow, somewhat shaky breath, struggling to find his voice around that lump in his throat. "We'll see if it's safe, Lo," he said finally, quietly, watching as the blonde slumped back in his seat. He took in another breath. "And I love you, too."
Lo's laugh wasn't one of humor. Nor was it bitter. It was this quiet, shaky sound which left Taylor finally bringing down his wall, tasting that whirlwind of emotions. He reached across the table and caught Lo's hand with his own, entwining their fingers, squeezing lightly as those blue eyes trekked back up to his face uncertainly.
"We'll get through this together, Lo."
"Yeah," Lo breathed. "Together."
A/N: And there's that chapter. I feel like they might be a lil' out of character but this is set in a fictional, alternate future of that series soooo yeah I guess it works out okay. Anywho, thanks for reading and please review!
~Averick~