She was too young to die. At the same time the thought crossed her mind, her brain started to process what the doctor was saying.

"Wh-what?" she asked, not sure if she was hearing correctly and hoping that she hadn't; that maybe the doctor was just joking or something, and hadn't just told her that she was going to die in a few months at most, if she was lucky.

There was a time when Alex didn't think about death. Not seriously, not when she was only seventeen and invincible. She was young and had her whole life ahead of her; she did things any other teenagers have done and made stupid mistakes that probably weren't for the best. The point was, the thought of her life being cut short never really occurred to her until that very moment, when her whole world suddenly turned on its head.

It was during that tense doctor's appointment scheduled straight after school. It was a sunny Tuesday and twenty seven degrees outside. She had come straight from school with her parents and had no idea what was in store for her once she arrived.

The doctor was speaking. She could hear blood pumping through her veins, loud with the beat of her heart. It drowned out the noises around her. Suddenly she was having trouble breathing; she could feel her chest expanding and caving in acutely, and could only manage to turn her ears on enough to catch a few phrases.

"I'm sorry ... had it tested it again to make sure ... treatments available to help ease the process ... it's gotten too big to fix ... came in too late ... hope for the best."

Alex didn't remember much after that. All she remembered was the feel of her nails digging into the chair's wooden armrest as her mother and father were called in so the doctor could relay everything back to them. They were as shocked as she was. When she saw her mother start to cry, she almost felt bad, but she couldn't move without wanting to hurl.

She had known something was wrong with her for some time now. It started with the headaches she gotten a year ago, just after they moved to this new city. At first everyone thought it was just the change of climate, from her old city's wet and rainy weather to the hot, suffocating heat that was ever present here. When the headaches became more frequent, she tried not to let on but she was worried. Days when she was supposed to be at school, had her skipping to take naps on the park bench just a street away. Fatigue and weakness, coupled with the headaches and soreness, made it harder and harder for her to concentrate and live normally as the days went past and the pain grew.

Her mother had made her go to the doctor two weeks ago. After describing the symptoms to a nurse, the nurse gave her a look she didn't understand until then. One that said that was as solemn as the doctor's, as he read out her symptoms in front of her, giving an explanation for everything. How her headaches were from the tumour in her brain pushing against her skull; how it wasn't the weather that was making her feel so down.

When they were leaving, she turned to her parents. No one had spoken since stepping out of that stuffy doctor's office. It was like everyone was too shocked to do anything. It almost made her angry, for a moment. It's not like things had to change, right? She was still the person she was yesterday, and she didn't need anyone pitying her, especially not her parents. Would they treat her differently now just because some doctor had pasted some stupid expiration date on her? Maybe the tests were wrong... She couldn't die. She couldn't, or else everything she had worked for was obsolete.

Her chin wobbled. Her breath hitched as she found it harder and harder to breathe normally. She felt so angry at everything. Helpless, like she couldn't do anything. Now everyone expected her to just roll over and give up. Who said it was too late? She was too young, dammit! Too young... She looked to her mum, desperately with watery eyes.

"I can't die, Ma. I can't."

"I'm so, so sorry, baby girl."

Then she felt her mother's arms wrapping around her, drawing her in. She realised she was sobbing, her whole body shuddering in her mother's embrace, while her dad stood to the side, but still close enough for her to feel his warmth. She could tell he was trying not to break down too, not outside the clinic, in front of everyone on the pavement.

She cried and slowly resigned herself to the fact that's she's dead now.

And nothing mattered anymore.