It wasn't too long ago that I was human. It wasn't too long ago that I had to say goodbye to everything I ever knew, loved, and felt. I guess being a creature of the night comes with the territory. First of all, my name is Danny. Unlike some of my other immortal friends, I am not like them where I go out preying on unsuspecting innocent people, offer them sexual pleasure then take their life. I also don't have a lover to return back to after a long night of flight. I prefer being alone, I didn't ask for this life or this doom. It was offered to me when there was no other choice. It found me and now I have decided to live out that immortal life in solitude.
I hide in the dark. To me, darkness signifies mystery and in some ways I am mysterious. My piercing blue eyes capture much attention but I am quite content with my position as a single being. Or rather content with that fact that I owe no one anything. Let's get one thing straight, dear reader, immortal life is not what the critics claim it up to be. You have no feelings, everything is dead, no hope of happiness. You can't even walk into the sun to go for a walk. Darkness is only the time you're allowed outside and a short time it is, when you have to eat. You miss out on the world. You always have to be careful of who sees you and hide your tracks because if they find you, they kill you.
When I first became the creature I am today I thought it would be the most glorious thing that could happen to me? But now I see that Dominic was right when he said my life would different from that day forward. I can't even see my family anymore; I wasn't even able to go to my father's funeral those years ago. I wasn't there with my sister on her wedding day or when my mother fell sick, I should have been there. But this damned immortal life prevented me from stepping foot in the sun, or even waking up. Even the days were cold and rainy; the sun was beating for me. Immortal life, vampire life is not what they crack it up to be but for some reason I love this life. Maybe it is the powers entrusted me or the freedom of flight or new feelings of rage and passion that envelope my body. Whatever the reason, I love it and no one is taking this power, this life, this curse or gift away from me.
When my Maker Dominic presented me with the offer of immortal life, I had always hoped that maybe it would be different as it was for others. I had known many vampires when I was a human. Our village was controlled by them. Some people were aware of them, but most were clueless as to the beings that lived in the shadows and preyed upon their families. My family had been subjected to the Vampires' taunting for years.
I had seen many of them; most were kind and others ferocious. I was blind to their suffering but aware of the key element that made them what they are. Their need to feed was greater than anything they felt, and it wasn't until I became one of them that I understood their savagery when feeding. The blood is like a drug. One sip of it makes our heads spin. A feeling of euphoria swims through our vessels creating a feeling equal to an orgasm. It's a purely exhilarating and equally sinful way to feel.
Dominic always pressed into my mind the importance of feeding every night. Not only does it keep us strong but it gives us purpose. When you have eternity and an immense state of hunger, feeding is the only logical answer. Feeding was something I was not prepared to do. The thought of taking another life for my benefit; it was completely unnatural and brazen in every way. But as the weeks went on after my transformation, not only was I starving but I was weak. I needed blood. My first victim wasn't enough to fill up the aching hunger I felt. The bloodlust entranced me quickly. I was lost. I still am.
However, through the years I have managed to quench that hunger. Whereas before I could kill an entire village now I can settle for two or three souls a night. It's still a hefty price to pay for immortality even after all these years.
I knew the price I would have to pay when I accepted this destiny. But it wasn't easy. No, I've given up a lot to be who I am today but it was not all in vain. There may yet be hope for me. There may be a clue as to why I can still retain a small amount of hope despite my plight.
There are some out there who are involved with the humans. But those relationships never last. Eventually a human will begin notice certain things. And according to Dominic, they must never put the pieces together.
It's imperative that our secret is kept safe. I feel though, that it must be awfully terrible to not be able to socialize with those we left behind.
Before my transformation was complete, I tried to keep up with the dealings of my family but it was too much to bear. So after three weeks, I left with Dominic. My parents believed I was taken by the devil. However, I was somewhere in between and aside from the hunger, I was doing all right.
There are times however, that I feel utterly alone. When you have eternity, you come across a lot of the female species, living and dead. But none will ever satisfy that urge that gnaws at your insides. The urge to feed and kill.
Perhaps being alone is possibly the worst part of being what I am.