1A/N: I suck at finishing old stories and getting inspired and starting new ones! I really want to start updating my stuff but I get so distracted with life despite having nothing going on! I definitely want to get my stories going, though, but I started writing this one a few months back and finished it last night, so here it is. Chapter One! Enjoy and review, please! Boy love! M/M relationship! Homsexuaaaals yeeey!
I was falling. It wasn't a long drop. In fact, it probably only lasted about two seconds from the point of me standing to me landing in a place that I had no business being in. It would have been okay. It would have been fine if I hadn't landed there. Of all places.
I was finishing an English test in seventh period and I hated myself for being so slow, but the bell had rung and I still had five more questions. I hurriedly read through the questions and filled in the bubbles despite feeling like an idiot for being the last one still in the classroom. When I finally finished, I freaked out because I still had to go to my locker to get my book for my Statistics homework before running all the way across campus to the buses.
Yeah, so I'm a senior who still rides the bus. I don't give a fuck! Though at times like this it is inconvenient.
I probably looked like even more of an idiot sprinting across the hilly terrain of the high school campus, but I didn't care. I was not trying to spend two hours walking home because I didn't study for a test. Fuck that.
Anyway, I barely caught the bus as it was about to pull out and the bus lady shook her head as she re-opened the doors to see my panting face. My lateness was a common occurrence over the years and I only smiled sheepishly at her and mumbled a "thanks".
My bus was a freakishly overcrowded one. To the point where two to a seat became three to a seat because there wasn't enough room for everyone. I'm pretty sure we were over maximum capacity by about ten every single day. Basically this meant I had to literally push between people's legs and arms and step over backpacks and feet to find a place to sit. This became increasingly difficult when Karen start driving again.
The bus swayed and I had to hold the backs of seats to steady myself, which meant I had to also accidentally put my hands on people because there was just no avoiding it.
I muttered "sorries" and "my bads" and some people giggled and some people scowled, but this was typical and no one complained.
And then it happened.
I saw a spot in the back and I rushed toward it. It was occupied by a backpack instead of a person and I figured I would use my senior status to frighten the kid into holding his backpack in his lap so I could sit. I was probably the oldest one on the bus. The only other senior who took the bus still was...
"Fuckin' shit!"
"Sorry about that Paul! No cursing! Just sit there!" Karen yelled from the front of the bus.
Four years of taking the bus, you get to know the bus driver and vice versa. She had made a sharp turn out of the bus loading zone that sent me falling into the lap of Jared Tanner; said fellow senior and my biggest crush since I first saw him in Sophomore year.
I became a slave to hormones as my ass hit his thighs and his arms reflexively shot up to catch me. I think my head hit the boob of some overly made-up Sophomore girl who had the window seat beside him, but all I could think was how this was the first time I had ever touched Jared and it wasn't just a touch, it was almost full body contact.
I got hard.
I was so fucking embarrassed. Why couldn't I have tripped and fallen in the street and hit my head on concrete? That would have been so much easier than landing in Jared's warm and tender embrace. And I would have gotten up a lot faster. I think I may have laid in his lap for a few seconds too long because the Sophomore girl said, "Oh no, it's fine! Just lay on my boobs. That's cool."
I blushed even harder and despite her sarcastic tone, she was right. I launched myself forward and tried not to notice how his lap felt under my ass. Luckily I had my backpack in my hand when I fell so it was conveniently hiding my erection. I stood awkwardly in a half crouch next to their seat, in the third row from the back.
I was going to continue on my way and pretend nothing happened, but Jared and whorish Sophomore girl were scooting over and putting their bags in their laps to make room for me. I didn't want to be rude so I sat on the very edge of the seat and my entire left side met Jared's right side. It was comfortable and almost sweet in a way that made my entire body hot and my erection more persistent. His dusty brown hair went to just below his ears and he wore his usual black jeans and black band tee. His eyes were hazel and fixed on his ipod.
I wasn't sure if he could hear me, but I decided to apologize.
"My bad guys," I said. I made sure I spoke to both of them so he wouldn't notice how he was consuming my every thought, and I must have had a pervy glint in my eyes because whore girl nodded and grimaced before quickly turning away. I tried to think normal thoughts and at least make my gaze less fiery than it felt despite the hot and racing feelings I had flickering through my body. Fucking Jared Tanner caught me in his arms and I SAT on him. Fuck. Fuck I'm going to have a glorious memory to use tonight.
"Thanks...for...catching me I guess?" I said as an awkward question followed by an uncomfortable laugh. I was trying to be casual and funny. It's what I do. I'm the casual and funny guy who is secretly crushing on a slightly goth-punk boy.
I wasn't sure he had heard me because he had his headphones on, but he looked at me and nodded with raised eyebrows and I had to play off my hitch in breathing as a cough.
I panicked quietly for the next eight minutes until we reached the first stop. It was a beautiful day with a nice breeze coming through some of the open windows and the air hummed with life and idiots laughing about whatever idiots laugh about on buses. It was too peaceful and it felt too right being swayed gently on the bus into a nonchalant Jared. Our shoulders brushing constantly and perfectly. I savored my misfortune and tried to get as much out of the encounter as I could, but at the first stop, whore girl stood.
I pretended to be relieved, but I was in heaven sitting there.
I stood and so did Jared...We moved into the aisle and let the girl get out and he scooted over to his usual window seat and I moved to where he was. The seat was warm and weighed down slightly from him having sat there. I felt like such a creeper, but I was so used to watching him from a distance that I wanted to make every moment that I had in his presence count.
I couldn't decide where to look so that it didn't seem like I was staring at him. I finally settled on looking at the aisle and I noticed that my Stats textbook was lying there forgotten. I must have dropped it when I fell. Geeze, nobody thought to pick it up for me? Jerks.
I kind of made a show of picking up my book because Stats was the only class I had or that I had ever had with Jared. Even though we had assigned seats and sat on opposite sides of the class, it was still the best part of my day getting to steal glances at him for fifty minutes.
I never thought I would be so lucky as to have Jared speak directly to me. I've only ever gotten nods and half-smiles and that eye-brow raise at seeing a familiar face.
When I went to put my book in my bag, he turned his head to me and I saw his chest heave out of the corner of my eye. He looked distressed and I wanted to make some stupid joke, but thankfully before I could embarrass myself further he said, "Well, shit fuck."
"What?" I said surprised at his sudden unconventional profanity. His eyes were fixed on my quickly disappearing book.
"I forgot to get my Stats book back from my stupid friend and we have a shitload of homework tonight, don't we?" he said.
"Ah, damn. Yeah, we usually do," I said while trying to be my usual casual self.
"You get off on my stop, right?" he said.
"Um...I think so. Third stop?" I said while pretending I didn't know that he lived about five blocks away from me.
"Can I borrow your book tonight when you're done with it or something. I've been fucking up in that class, so I can't miss anymore homework," he said.
My heart skipped a beat. Should I go for it?
"Well, I usually take my time doing homework, so you probably wouldn't get it until super late. Um, you can probably come over and we can do it together, I guess?" I proposed. I licked my lips. They had become dry and I was struggling to keep my breathing under control. Did I just say "...we can do it together..." to his face?!
"Oh yeah. Sounds good, thanks man. Should I just walk home with you then?" he said. He tossed his hair back and out from in front of his eyes.
"Yeah sure. Let me text my Mom and let her know. It should be fine though," I said. Maybe I lost some cool points for having to ask my mother for permission to have guests, but fuck if she comes home and kicks him out before I even get to show him how cool I can be.
"Sweet," he said.
I hid a smile at his typical response.
My mother responded with "Sure, make sure the kitchen is clean so I can cook when I get home." Again, typical response. Being an only child meant that all the chores fell on me and having my mother pay for anything and everything I needed meant that I better do it and like it or lose everything I loved. I'll never let you go sweet Pokemon.
We sat in silence as the bus stopped and started and glided through the afternoon breeze. As we neared that familiar cement brick wall encasing our neighborhood, my heart jumped into my throat and my stomach lurched. Jared was coming to my house. Jared was going to be in my room. Shit, Jared was going to be TALKING to me!
The bus stopped and I looked over at him and raised my eyebrows and gave him a stupid lipless grin. He just smirked and followed me as I stood and navigated my way down the aisle. I waved to Karen and stepped out of the bus with him close behind. I walked normally debating whether I should just pretend it was no big deal that he was there or walk slower and try to start a conversation or something. He made the decision for me.
"So what do you have in Stats?" he said.
"What like my grade?" I said.
"Yeah. Did you look? She posted them this morning," he said.
"Damn. I don't know. I fucked up on that last test but I do all of my homework and shit. Last time I checked I had like a 90% though, so I should at least be at a B," I said. I wondered if I had said too much and if maybe he preferred the silent type.
"Shit, maybe I should do homework with you more often then because I barely have a C. I used to forget my book so many times when school started and then I'd rush in my morning classes to do what problems I could before third period. It was ridiculous."
I laughed at the thought of him hurrying to do anything. He always just strode coolly through school like he didn't have a care in the world.
"You should have asked me before, man! I would've let you use my book anytime," I said. Sometimes I hated myself. I sounded like such a desperate tool. Maybe it was just me.
"Actually I thought about it a few times! You seemed like a cool guy, but it was already late and I didn't know exactly where you lived or anything, so I just took it like a man," he said with a laugh.
My stomach jumped when he admitted that he had thought specifically about me before. I don't know what it was about this boy, but damn could he make me feel like a little school girl.
"Well now you will have no excuse for failing Stats. Homework is 50% of the grade and you can't possibly get an F on a test if you did the homework. Next time you fuck up and leave your shit at school, knock on my door and be all like, 'Paul, my savior, please help me! Can I come in and benefit from your lack of forgetfulness?'," I said. I got a bit carried away and let maybe too much of my real personality out. I panicked. What if he didn't think I was funny?
He laughed. Fuck yeah.
"Oh is that what I'll say?"
"Yep! Word for word," I said deciding to go with fewer words this time. It was a strategic game; getting to know your crush and having them get to know you.
"So I kind of just realized that we've never really talked directly to each other. Like I know your name and you probably know mine and stuff, but...I've never introduced myself or anything, so hi Paul. My name is Jared Andrew Tanner the Second and I hate it," he said with a laugh and an extended hand.
We were just turning the corner out of sight of the others that got off at this stop and I suddenly felt like we were the last two people in the entire world and he wanted my hand in his. Maybe I was living in a dream, but shit his hands were nimble and gently calloused like he played the guitar every now and then. Shit...
"Hello Jared, I am Paul Stuart Jennings. I'm a Libra and I like candlelit evenings and longs walks on the beach. Also I think your name is pretty awesome. Just sayin'," I said between laughs and hidden gasps at the feel of his hand in mine.
He hoisted his sliding backpack straps back onto his shoulders with a jump and a huge and gorgeous smile that was just for me. He laughed and said, "Well I'm a Gemini so I guess we're compatible."
I never expected that talking to him would be so easy, but the words just flowed effortlessly from my mouth despite the frenzy of emotions that were being stirred up within me.
I said, "I didn't think you'd be one to know about astrology."
"Why not?"
"Um, I don't know, actually. I guess I don't really know anything about you except that you look like a badass and like you probably play guitar," I said. I felt like an idiot revealing how little I knew about him and that I knew or assumed anything at all.
"I look like a badass? You really think so?" he said. His voice became soft and his eyes were misty. He raised a hand to his chest and stopped walking to look at me.
I couldn't hold back a laugh at how genuinely proud he looked.
"I mean in general yeah, you do. Not so much right now, though," I managed to say between the ridiculous boyish giggles that I couldn't manage to properly restrain.
"I've been striving for badassery all my life and to think that I exude it naturally and without even knowing! I have transcended normal human existence!" he said with hands outstretched and loud enough for it to echo in the quiet neighborhood.
"Please, oh great one, forgive me! I did not recognize you! Please spare me your wrath!" I said in mock fear. What the hell was I saying?
He looked at me with crossed arms and as we continued to walk side-by-side he raised his chin and gave me a haughty sideways glance.
He smirked and said, "You mere mortals are plagued with foolishness, but I am a gracious god and your actions will be forgiven if you can provide me with an offering of food and drink."
I laughed almost violently and said, "Many thanks, Gracious One. I hope you like soda and juice and Hot Cheetos and shit."
"I...LOVE...Hot Cheetos and shit. How the fuck did you know. I should have come over way sooner. What have I been wasting my days doing?" he said with mock sincerity and I tried not to die over the fact that he seemed to be enjoying my responses so far.
We rounded the last corner to my street and headed up my driveway. I unlocked the front door and ushered him in and said, "Please do come in, sir."
He smirked and nodded and walked in front of me. I silently cursed his low hanging backpack that so conveniently hid his ass from my lusty glances.
"Please remove your shoes, sir. Madam Jennings wishes for her carpets to remain untainted," I said while kicking my shoes off at the tiled entry and locking the door.
"No joke, man. This house is spotless and super nice. I have a feeling your mom is slightly insane," he said while eyeing the place and tailing me to the kitchen.
"Why thank you kind sir, and I am quite pleased to have someone other than my father to agree with me on that notion."
"Only child?" he asked.
"Yep. That being said I'm the only slave around here so I've got some dishes to do before we partake in homework and other such merriment," I said with a slight laugh.
"Dude, we are so vibing right now. No one ever goes along with me when I talk like that. I got two siblings and they suck at being awesome," he said joining in on my laughter.
Yeah I can't really breathe right now. I thought it was just me, but he's also noticing how easily and well we get along, and he said we're vibing and indirectly called me awesome.
Damn.
"Yeah I never really expected you to be one for talking. You always looked too cool for words. Gestures and grunts seemed like adequate language for you," I said as I shoved dishes in the dishwasher and hand-washed the delicate ones.
Jared had taken a seat in the bar stool facing me and he kind of had one eyebrow up as he watched me clean.
"I talk too damn much, actually. Just to people I actually want to hear me though," he added.
"Aww you want me to hear you! That's so sweet Jared, but we just met, I'm not ready for our relationship to be at that level yet," I said feigning a feminine tone and bringing my wrist to my chest. I sure hope I didn't just say something stupid. Sometimes my jokes leave my mouth before my sense can catch up.
He smirked his usual acknowledging smirk and said, "Oh we'll see about that."
I tried not let it show that my knees had become weak with his off-handed retort and I quickly threw my gaze over my shoulder to nod at the fridge and hide the fact that my entire face was definitely as red as it felt. "There's drinks in the fridge and Cheetos and whatever else in the pantry, help yourself. You don't have to wait for me," I said trying to get his eyes anywhere but on me.
Jared in my house. Jared laughing and talking with me. Jared play-flirting with me. It's all happening so fast, what if I fuck it up even faster. Stay cool Paul. Hot seventeen-year-old-walking-sex is just raiding your pantry for an after school snack just like with your other friends.
I'll give him an after school snack...
"Fuck me!"
"W-What!?" I said almost dropping my mother's wine glass that I had been washing. Is he psychic?
"You have Fruit by the Foot, man. This is going to be a beautiful evening," he said, completely redirecting my train of thought back to the reason he was here in the first place. Ugh, homework.
I finished the dishes and we grabbed our drinks, snacks and backpacks and I led him to my room whilst trying not pass out from the lack of oxygen to my brain.
When we got to the other side of the house, I kicked open my door with my foot and quickly walked in thanking whoever that the sunlight streaming from my window was amazingly moody and epic and displaying my black and blue room magnificently. Feast your eyes Jared! I threw my gaze to him to see his reaction.
"Nice. Jared approves," he said with a sidelong glance at everything.
Butterflies again, but I ignored them and said a simple, "Thanks."
I had a desk but only one chair and we couldn't both fit in it so I looked at the two other seating options. The floor...or my bed.
I wasn't ready to have all that walking sex on my bed. Horrible things might transpire.
I lowered myself and my backpack to the carpeted floor and he followed suit as we leaned against my bed instead.
We started on our homework and had the book between us on the floor and worked out the problems together. I may or may not have showed off my understanding of the concept while lazily twirling Fruit by the Foot in my mouth as if these problems didn't phase me. His eyes widened adorably and squinted sexily as he struggled with the concept before he began to understand.
My mom came home somewhere in the midst of our madness and I embarrassedly introduced him and quickly removed him from her sight. My mother had no idea I was gay of course, but with the object of my desire beside me I felt as if "GAY FOR HIM →"-or something equally revealing-was written on my face.
I fiddled with various objects in my room and changed our mood music almost frantically. I was good at paying attention in school, but at home I had a lot less dedication and focus.
Jared snorted in laughter at my antics.
"Shaddap! I told you I like to take my time," I said in my defense. We'd only had one problem left. The annoying thing with stats is that twenty problems was like two hours of work because of all the reading and work showing. I couldn't imagine having to rush this before a class.
After finishing the problem I closed my notebook and threw it across the room and yelled, "Freedom!"
"Don't you have other homework?"
"Fuck that shit!" I said scoffing at the rude awakening. "I'll do it later."
"Yeah I'm with you. Stats is draining."
"Stats! Use Drain Punch! It's Super Effective!" I said in my fatigued and comfortable state, forgetting to hide my nerd.
"Oh. My. God. Woah," Jared said, eyes huge.
Before I could explain myself and adamantly deny the existence of the Pikachu plush in my closet he continued.
"I fucking love Pokemon," he said.
Yeah, I've never been happier in my life than in this beautiful moment.
"No way, right now. You're blowing my mind Jared. I play like all day every day. In fact," I said as I opened the top drawer of my nightstand and pulled out my DS, "I still need to play today."
"Fuck fuck fuck, this is getting too real man," he said as he reached into his backpack and pulled out his own slightly battered, band sticker-covered DS.
"Oh my God we gotta trade like right now," I said, the nerd in me squeeing over a fellow fan and the love struck teenage girl in me gushing over her crush's shared interests.
"I'm so in love with you right now. We got a real bromance going on here," he said.
I don't know how to live right now, but I managed to slightly hide my gasp and flush as I quietly but enthusiastically agreed with a laugh.
I leaned my head down to hide the red heat of my flushing face and tell-tale smile.
In the midst of our playing, my father got home and popped his head in to say hi and meet Jared. He gave me a suggestive and questioning eye-brow raise and looked at Jared before I shut the door in his face. My dad knows I'm gay and I do not dare to relive the terribly embarrassing day that he found out last year. My blush was practically painted on my face at this point and I opened the window muttering something about my stuffy room so Jared hopefully wouldn't notice he was making me hot and bothered.
At about eight o'clock, dinner was ready and my mother invited Jared to eat with us, but just as he was about to grab a plate, his cell phone rang and it was his mother beckoning him home and away from my lusty, teenage gaze.
"Sorry, Paul. Forgot to tell my mom I was coming over here. Now she's pissed and wants me home for dinner. I appreciate the offer Mrs. Jennings. It was nice meeting you both," he said in the most unexpectedly polite fashion for someone in a Cradle of Filth t-shirt. Books and covers and all that shit.
"Nah it's cool, man. Don't want you getting in trouble," I said as I walked him back to my room to get his things. We were alone again and yet it felt different than it had when we were busy with homework. Now we were staring at one another in my room with dumb smiles on our faces, out of sight and earshot from my parents with an awkward but easy silence between us. He grinned at me. We were about the same height and our eyes were level with one another. We stared at one another for a few moments that felt more like an eternity of swarming, angry bees inside my stomach before he reached inside his pocket as if struck with an idea.
He handed me his phone.
"I'm gonna need your name and number right here, please. I hope you have unlimited texting because I do and I survive on text messages," he said.
I laughed and input my data and even took a stupid picture of myself really quickly on his phone and saved it as my contact photo. He laughed and shoved the device back into its resting spot.
"Hey man, I really appreciate you helping me out today. I feel like a good, homework-doing student again and I actually understood it, too!" he said with a smile.
"Nah, it's cool, man. Anytime," I said. I had to refrain from saying something ridiculous like: "PLEASE COME OVER TOMORROW AND PLAY WITH ME AGAIN!".
"I will take your word for that. Can we just like...always do our Stats homework together? I seriously had a good time and you are way cool," he said to me, staring intently into my eyes.
"Yeah? You like this shit? Huh?" I said, waving my hands across my body and raising my eyebrows suggestively and biting my lip. He laughed really hard and loudly before suddenly going quiet with a serious look on his face and said, "So what if I do?"
Did I mention he took a step closer? Did I mention we were only like a foot apart now?
I forgot what English was as he stared at me and my eyes went wide and my mouth fell stupidly open. I openly gaped at him breathless and instinctively took a step back right against my wall.
His expression broke into a wide smile as he laughed. "Ha! Relax man, I'm totally kidding. You so should have seen your face just now, oh my God. Priceless. Okay I'm going home before I get served a can of dog food for dinner," he said. He pushed passed me and out of my door before my motor functions kicked in and I was able to walk him to the front door like a proper host. He put on his shoes and waved to my parents before winking at me and heading out. I closed and locked the door behind him and let out a breath I hadn't realized I'd been holding.
This boy that I had barely known and been lusting childishly after for two years was finally an active member in my life. We loved a lot of the same things and we have a similar type of humor. He flirted with me. In my room. Multiple times. With guys like Jared it was hard to tell what their orientation was and pretty safe to assume they were bisexual. Fuck, I'm a mess.
Later, I was lying in bed thinking about how his scent was lingering in my bedroom and I looked down at the bulge in my pants-my cell phone-and realized I hadn't gotten his number and I slapped my forehead in frustration. Then I realized that it was better this way because I would have been a creeper and texted him five minutes after he left and been like "Sup" or something lame and far too soon.
My pocket vibrated and I reached for the smartphone tucked into it. It was a picture message from a number I didn't recognize. I opened it hesitantly, hoping it wasn't one of my friends texting me a picture of lesbian porn or something terrifying.
My chest fluttered as a picture of Jared holding up two books and a packet of papers with a defeated look on his face and a caption that read: "Finally going to tackle the rest of my hw. Wish me luck. And save my number ;)".
I think I'm going to have to wash my sheets after tonight.
A/N: So? What did you think? Is it as funny to you as it is to me? Am I just tickling my own fancy over here? Please Review and thank you so much for reading! :)