She awoke to the scent of Snuggle fabric softener, cologne and faintly of sweat. Her eyes fluttered open and for a moment she just lay there in the crook of his arm, watching his face. It had a childlike innocence in his state of deep sleep. His eyelids twitched and seconds later, they opened.
She smiled and looked up at him, snuggling closer. "Morning."
He bent his head down to give her a kiss on the forehead, moving the mess of blonde hair on top of her head aside so he could do it. Wordlessly, he slid out of bed and headed to the bathroom. She could hear the water running from the next room.
She sat up, pulling her knees to her chest. Her fingers played with the white fabric beneath her. She bit her lip, deep in thought. Part of her thought that this was a huge mistake. It was one step closer for her getting her heart broken, again. The other part didn't care. For the moment, she was happy. Happier than she had been in a while so why should she care about anything else?
Maybe it was the inevitability of him leaving. This impending doom feeling that radiated from the pit of her stomach all the way through her heart and up to her head. She could feel the clock ticking away at their time together. Just like the rabbit in Alice in Wonderland, she was running to catch a date that might've passed her by.
"I've got to go. Don't forget to lock up if you leave." His head popped in, blonde strands sticking to his forehead.
She looked down at her feet, finding her voice as hurt rose in her throat. Of course he would leave her. "O-okay."
At the sound of the front door slamming closed, she closed her eyes. Tears slid down her cheeks and landed on the sheets, creating wet circles in the fabric. She wiped at them furiously, disgusted with the sticky feeling they made on her cheeks. She was being sensitive as she always was, and she was overreacting. A shower was what she needed right now.
The warm water did nothing to calm her scattered mind. Her panic only escalated once she was fully clothed and standing in the living room, her eyes glued to the door. She wasn't sure that if she walked out, she'd ever be let back in again. The bed beckoned to her, begging her to come back and pretend it was all a dream. But he'd be back and he wouldn't be happy that she had stayed around – or would he?
She shook her head. He wouldn't appreciate her hanging around all day. She took one foot after another and continued well out the door. Looking back, she paused with her hand on the doorknob.
This was her last chance to go back. But go back to what? The way they were when they were dating? Obviously that time was long gone. Suddenly she was regretting ever coming. Angry at herself, she started to slam the door. However, something strange happened.
As quickly as it had come, the anger disappeared. It left her with a feeling of nostalgia. Getting back those good memories simply weren't worth the cost anymore. So instead of going back and waiting for him to come home, she gently closed the door and walked away.