5A/N: By the way, I tend to have speedy updates if I'm on a roll or have motivation *coughREVIEWScough*
~Chapter One: Eye Contact~
Textbook Definition: What is Eye Contact?:
The most important skill when it comes to sending mixed signals to a woman is eye contact. As much eye contact as you can. Try keeping it for prolonged periods of time -7 seconds or over, for best results.
This will cause the woman to feel very self concious about herself. Symptoms that occur will be a blush in the face, she will act awkward or nervous around you, her voice wiil go up an octave or two, and mentally, she shall fret over her appearance.
You must act aloof about this, as if it is second nature to stare into a girl's eyes. She will glorify these seconds even more, especially if she finds you very handsome and attractive. If she is nerdy, it is essentially the same above, but here, it is that she thinks you are Mr. Hottie, and she would most definately would want to go out for texting and scones.
After completing eye contact make sure to fixate your attention to something else at hand, so she will become very frusterated with you and write the manual she thinks you read.
The Tips:
1. NEVER break the eye contact whenever you are in conversation.
2. Always be sure to act as though you are interested in whatever she is saying albeit you have no interest or she is trailing off and her best friend is sitting there smirking. EXCEPTION: Once or twice, while she is talking, direct your attention to something else, for frusteration points.
3. If she finds you in a state of embaressment/ or minor awkwardness, flash her a smile and use EYE CONTACT. This is your best bet she won't blab about to this to her best friend. At most she'll just gush on about "HE SMILED AT ME *fangirl scream*!" EXCEPTION: If there is an INCREDIBLY awkward situation where the both of you are embaressed, act in the most appropriate way possible, which is have an expression of pure horror on your face.
4. Use eye contact at every possible chance. However, you don't want to use it TOO much. At times, do not speak to her for prolonged periods of time. This will drive her to the brink of insanity.
5. Especially if she is shorter than you, make sure that you make it obvious you are looking into her eyes.
6. A strategy known to drive 'em bonkers is to have complete eye contact for a week or so, and then drop it for months.
The History of Eye Contact:
Over the centuries, men have found this method of sending mixed singals best since the method was invented. It was recognized as a way of "flirtingo circa Victorian era. In the late 1900's and early 2000's as "eye sex" by young teenage girls who seemed to think when men looked into their eyes, that obviously meant they wanted to strip them of their clothing. Obviously that is not what the intention of this, but they can believed what they want.
Now, young grasshopper, now that you have learned the skills of eye contact, we will next move onto the chapter about awkward situations.
A/N: Give a hand to Enchiladas, my best friend, who helped me a bit with this chapter. Remember to review, otherwise I'll withold chapters. So how about I get a total of 5 reviews?