She's beautiful. So much so , that it cannot be real , and yet it is. And I am jealous. So, so jealous , but at the same time I feel crap about it-we're identical twins , after all .It's like being jealous of myself.

But yet it isn't. Because even though we look and sound the same, she's the only one that Mum and Dad notices. The only one who gets praised, showered with attention, adored. We might be into different things, and have different friends, but we both work hard and do well and are more or less good people .And yet , it's like I am a lesser being.

The worst thing about it is that she's the best sister I could ask for , but she's too perfect and sweet to notice what is going on. And to tell her , would be to destroy her illusions. As annoying as it is , I just can't do that.

But what can I do? What can I do? It's a really busy year for us . Exams , exams , and more exams. Between getting my heart broken and studying , I don't even have time to eat , let alone figure this out.

No time to eat.

There's a thought. Mum always makes snide comments about the amount of food I eat. And recently , I've been looking in the mirror and seeing an elephant. Perhaps, if I were to diet…it'd make sense, considering my hectic timetable- no need to waste precious study time .And perhaps , just perhaps , it might make things better. The day I look into that mirror and there is no longer an elephant staring back will surely be the day I end up being acknowledged the same as she is. I have some doubt about whether this'll actually work , but the person I ask when I feel like that is her. And I can't do that. So I'll go it alone.

And when I have succeeded , I will surely be adored. This time , things will surely be better.