"Tabitha," the professors voice rang out through the silent lecture hall.
"Yes?" I replied quickly knowing full well he had asked me something that I had not been paying attention to at all.
"Correct," my instructor said with a smile that showed he knew I was not paying attention at all. "This is in fact a grammatically correct sentence."
Staring at the big white board at the front of the room I saw the words 'The crew of the U.S.S. Enterprise were surprised to find that their ship was filled with tribbles.' Well at least Doctor Miles always used interesting sentences in his tedious grammar class. My personal favourites were the ones that made fun of the art students such as: 'I don't always talk to art students, but when I do I ask for a large fries," or my personal favourite "the students had graduated with their arts degree and were now qualified to ask me what kind of latte I wanted." Even when he was not writing mean things about the art students Professor Miles was being inventive. He had a tendency to constantly use references to old television shows or comic book characters that only a few of the more (what's the word, interesting? Yeah lets go with interesting...) interesting students recognized; myself included.
Kat was sitting next to me with her hand over her mouth doing her best not to laugh herself senseless, or at the very least not burst out into the giggles that threatened to overwhelm her. She always seemed to be there when I was publicly shamed. We had been best friends since we began working at the same dead end cashier job and when we both ended up in university together it was like God was telling us to be friends. Now we had a couple of courses together and on our ways to two useless degrees in the sciences. We should have been nurses.
Looking away from my professor once more I put my pen to a spare sheet of paper and continued my doodle of a vampire. I had a full page of notes to go with the lecture but my brain usually worked on two separate pathways. Sitting still and doing nothing while listening to someone drone on and on about grammar wasn't exactly a thrill a minute for me so I sketched. It was a way to keep myself from falling asleep in a lecture about comma's that I had heard every year since grade one or two. You would think grown ass adults could write a damn sentence.
The vampire I was drawing was pretty much a scantily clad pin-up girl with an undersized waist to compliment her over sized chest and butt. She looked relatively hot but was still nothing more than an absent minded doodle. Admittedly I had started drawing slutty women in this particular class because I loved the amount of effort the guy who sat next to me put into trying to sneak a peek at my doodles.
As I put the finishing touches on the vampires hair I felt a current of electricity shoot through my body. I cried out and fell to the floor in horrible pain. Shutting my eyes tight I could hear other people dropping throughout the classroom. Screams of pain rang out from guys and girls alike, but the screams of pain quickly led into screams of pure panic.
I couldn't hear much over the screaming and shrieking that came from my own mouth as pain overwhelmed me, but I could vaguely hear Kat asking me if I was ok. She must have been screaming pretty loud for me to have heard it over the noise and the pain though. In an attempt to hear what she was yelling at me I bit down on my lip but only managed to cause myself more pain. Where was a nineteenth century doctor with a leather strap and booze when you needed them?
The electricity burned every part of me for a solid minute, though it felt like hours, before stopping as abruptly as it had begun. As the pain subsided I cracked open my eyes to see people running from the classroom in a state of utter panic and Kat was looking at me in horror as though I had sprouted a second head.
"What- what happened?" I asked as I tried to sit up which sent Kat scurrying away from me.
"What the hell are you?!" Kat screamed.
"What are you on about?" I replied in full blown confusion. "I'm Tabitha. Your best friend. We yell at the Walking Dead and make fun of girls in Uggs together all the time."
"Not who are you! WHAT are you?" she yelled back at me. "Why are your ears insanely long all of a sudden?!"
Freezing I reached up to touch my ears. Kat was right. They had grown to long pointed tips and I looked at Kat in horror, "you can see them?"
"Of course I can see them! How could anyone miss that?!"
"Kat calm down," I whispered in hopes that the poor girl would just breathe and calm down while I explain. "I've always had these."
"Some how I'm pretty sure I would have noticed if my friend looked like she belonged in World of Warcraft," Kat exclaimed.
"Hey, I am not that slutty!" I retorted. "Besides it means that there's something wrong with magic."
"There is no way you could possibly make me believe in magic," Kat said with a frown.
"Fine then I put on fake ears just to fuck with you," I told her with an eye roll before looking around the room while Kat continued to freak out.
Amidst the classroom other people were undergoing the same type of conversation that I had been having with Kat. There were harpies trying to explain to their best friends why they had jagged teeth and bird wings on their backs. In the back corner there was a fawn trying to tell his friends that his goat legs we just a prank. And there was a siren with gills sticking out the side of her head and pointed fangs protruding from her mouth begging the guys who were previously fawning over her to come back. It's amazing how loyal one night stands are.
As a camera flash went off beside me I glanced back at Kat to see her staring from her cell phone to me and back again. Rolling my eyes I asked her, "what are you doing?"
"I thought you might be like a vampire and disappear in mirrors, camera's, and reflections," she replied with a hint of disappointment in her voice.
"I'm an elf not a vampire," I told her with a droll expression on my face. "Besides you have tons of photos of us from that trip to Toronto."
Kat fell silent again and I began looking around again. As the initial shock wore off friends were talking again and the noise went from panic to explanations. Of course some were still screaming but others were trying to cope with the twist of fate.
Looking back to Kat I saw the look of confusion on her face as she was trying to figure out something in her mind. She continued to stare at me for a moment before finally asking, "are your parents like you?"
"Ummmm," I replied. "That's a long story for a bit later today. Right now we have to leave. Like NOW!" Glancing towards the exit I saw a large dog like creature creeping in through one of the two doors to the large auditorium. The creature was what I could only imagine to be a demon straight from the fiery depths of Hell. The beast had no eyes but a long, slim face that ended in a pink nose with long, white whiskers sticking out from its cheeks. Really the demon, or what I'm going to call a demon, looked like a rat after a lab accident gone wrong. Besides missing it eyes the thing had sharp teeth that stuck out of it's mouth like the teeth of a crocodile and a malnourished body that showed all of it's ribs. The demon also had a tail with a sharp barb on the end that whipped around in an attempt to catch fleeing students.
Shoving myself off the floor I grabbed Kat's hand and dragged her with me. There was no way in hell we could take that thing on and some how I had a feeling it was looking for a meal. Kat was in stunned silence but her legs seemed to be working as I hauled her out of her spot on the floor next to me and towards the exit.
We headed for the door opposite the one where the demon had burst in hoping that it would go after other people in the room instead of us. Yes, I know that was a terrible thing to hope for but survival was the only thing on my mind.
Scrambling out of the door I saw another creature similar to the one we saw in the auditorium take down two students as they attempted to get into the elevator. If there was ever a time to take the stairs this would be it, but people all panic differently I suppose.
Keeping a tight grip on Kat I dragged her towards the parkade where I knew her fancy ass Range Rover was waiting. I was never really keen on the vehicle as it burned gas like there was no tomorrow and looked stupid, though I had never told Kat that, but in this situation my little Mazda was not going to get us to safety.
"Kat," I asked as I looked over my shoulder, "do you have your keys?"
"No," she replied back in anger as my question brought her back to reality from the stunned silence we had been running in. "They're in the classroom. In my purse. With all my stuff."
"Shit," I grumbled under my breath. "Any chance you can break into a car?"
"Why in the hell would I know that?" Kat responded, rather offended.
"Hey, I know all about the redneck heritage of yours," I snapped at her.
"That doesn't make me a criminal," she shouted back. "And besides, who has the farm?"
"I own five horses and some cows! That doesn't make me a hillbilly!" I yelled in return.
"Makes you more of one than me," Kat retorted.
"I'm a farm girl not a redneck!"
"There's a difference?"
"Yes! I don't have a drawl, a baby daddy, or a set of earrings that double as fishing lures!"
That finally stopped Kat as she glared at me before bursting into laughter. My hard gaze broke as I too began to laugh. I don't know why but as much as Kat and I tormented each other for our fucked up heritage we never hated each other, rather we laughed off the insults and were better friends the next day. Weird how life works.