It leaves a scar, to lose someone.

At first it's a rip and you're shocked.

Then you grieve, for however long or short a time.

And it heals, a layer at a time.

And then, eventually, it doesn't hurt.

You think of them, thoughts tinged warm.

You miss them, but you turn to another to fill the gap.

The agony has abated.

Then something triggers you.

A TV show, even if you knew what was coming.

And you end up sobbing.

Because the character you're most like

Just lost the man who was like a father to him.

Because you love those characters.

All of them reside in hall of warmth and light.

And maybe if the man didn't die just like your father,

And maybe if the actor didn't die just like your father,

Then maybe it wouldn't leave you bawling.

You wouldn't be crying as you watch.

Because it hurts.

Because you know better than anyone the emotions.

You sit, watching the show your father loved.

The show you now adore.

The show once you watched together.

And you cry.

Because death comes suddenly.

Because wounds long healed relapse.

Because it hurts.

It never stops hurting.

You can go on.

You can get used to the pain.

But you'll have to realize;

Triggers can be everywhere.

It won't just stop hurting forever.

Losing those you love wounds you,

And those wounds don't go away.

Triggers bring them back

And you must rebuild,

Hopefully stronger than before.