22New chapter! Yay! This one gave me some trouble as I ran into my first road block with this story- too many ideas for later chapters, not enough for current chapters... *sigh*
But I will not let that stop me from giving you all updates! I will work through it, that I promise you.
Huge thank you's to everyone who has been reviewing and following and favoriting- your support has played a gigantic part in helping me stick with this story despite the urge to give up like I always do. You guys are the best :)
Chapter 4
S.S.D.D; Same Shit, Different Day.
That is the motto I've come to live by. Geez Holly... way to be positive... Not that every day is bad. In fact, some days are almost good. Better than good actually. Some days are close enough to good that I consider them amazing. But... then there are the rest of those days. The not so good ones. Today was beginning to seem like one of those bad days.
I had woken up late, again. So late in fact that my mother had no time to help me with taming the obnoxiously curly disaster that was my hair this morning. In the rush we only had enough time to force it into a messy braid, one that thumped heavily against my back as I ran through the front entrance of school. I sped right past the deans office, waving my apologies- both for running and for being late, to the office secretaries. I had been late so many times this year and the year before it was a wonder that I hadn't been given detention for all my tardiness.
Slowing to a jog I hurried through the hallways to my locker- where I all but threw my jacket and bag inside, sliding my faded leather satchel over my shoulder to take its place. The chill of the air conditioning swept over my arms, forcing me to pause for a moment in debate on whether or not my t-shirt would be warm enough. In my rush this morning I hadn't taken into consideration the the weather and forgot to pick up my baggy cardigan I usually wore around school. Which just left me in the slightly form-fitting Wind Waker shirt I'd pulled out of my closet without thinking. Well, it would just have to do, wouldn't it? I toss my keys and agenda into my satchel, along with the small makeup case I kept both my makeup and pencils in. Closing my locker much louder than I'd intended I wince, pressing my hands momentarily to the cold grey metal as I shoosh it- as if that would make me look anything but crazy. Then I was off again, the rubber soles of my converse slapping the linoleum all the way down to Mrs. Ivy's class. I slow down, pushing the door open just in time to see everyone getting to their feet. Mrs. Ivy stood at the front of the room, to the side of the whiteboard as she spoke.
"Alright, everyone. We are going to be heading out by the tennis courts to look for our specimens. I'll be carrying a box or two of baggies for you but I'd recommend taking a few to start you off." She gestured to the enormous box of sandwich bags that rested in front of her on the table. "There is plenty for each of you as well as a net for you each to use. However," she paused, sending a look around the entire room. "It would be prefered if you did you're collecting in groups. Pairs would be best but if you would like to be in groups of three I will also accept that." she smiled, clapping her hands together. "Thats all I wanted to say. Please collect the things you need. I'll be locking the room so you can leave your purses and bags in here."
I sigh, stepping into the room with relief. I weave my way to the front to collect a net and a few bags. We had been learning about insects for a few weeks now and Mrs. Ivy had come up with the brilliant idea of having us collect different bugs and pin them to a board, identifying them to the best of our abilities. When it was completed she was going to grade us on how correct our information was, and of course on how many different species of insects we could collect.
I feel a tap on my shoulder and spin around suddenly, my face heating up in embarrassment. It was only Knox, his lack of knowledge about personal space making itself apparent again. He smirked, I assumed at the blush that had spread across my cheeks, reaching around me to pick up a small net with a yellow pole. "Aren't these made for kids?" he asked, arching an eyebrow as he waited for me to answer.
Nope, not this time new guy... I'm not giving in to you again. I shake my head to clear it, then shrug as I move away from the table and away from him.
"Hey." I can hear him trying to get my attention but I ignore him. That was my plan for the day. Ignore the new guy and stay out of trouble. Simple enough, yeah?
Knox is following me as I make my way outside. I can hear his boots hitting the tile just after mine do, hear the exhales of his breath as he keeps pace with me. I'm suddenly pulled to a stop, a hand on my left wrist. I glance back at Knox as he lifts my arm closer to his face, inspecting my tattoo with great interest. It makes me uncomfortable, having someone stare at me with such curiosity.
"I've been wondering... what is this?" he asked, gesturing to the green and black tribal bird tattoo that ran along the outside of my arm from my wrist to my elbow, as he releases my wrist. I scan the length of the hallway, finding us alone and the sounds of the rest of the class have begun to become more distant as they head outside. I suppose if there was ever a safer time it would be now. Taking a deep breath I meet his gaze.
"It's from a video game. The main character had the same tattoo. I saw it and fell in love with the design so I got one of my own.." I answer truthfully with a shrug.
Knox seems to think it over for a moment before he grins. "I knew I'd seen that tattoo somewhere before. It's Delsin's, isn't it? From Infamous: Second Son?"
To say I am surprised is an understatement. I'm shocked that he could name the game I'd stolen my tattoo from. So shocked that I cannot stop myself from smiling.
"Yeah... thats exactly right."
He nods, then seems to remember what we're supposed to be doing. "Oh! I, um... Sorry, I got distracted. I stopped you because I wanted to know if you would be my partner. For the bug-catching thing." he explained, running a hand through the back of his hair. "I just figured that we could help eachother out. You look like someone who pays attention in class and I have no clue what I'm doing so... please can you help me?"
"You want my help?" I ask, feeling a bit skeptical. Knox nods, his expression appearing genuine. I narrow my eyes, searching for an alternate meaning in his words. When I found none I sigh, giving him a nod. Before I know what has happened I feel a tug on my hand, and when I look up from my feet I find his hand holding mine.
"Well then we had better hurry or we won't have a chance to find any bugs." he said giving me a smile before gently pulling me into a walk. I watched our hands as we walked, trying to both process and deduce his reasoning for wanting to be my partner. This was the fourth time in two days that we had been in eachothers presence. Surely his curiosity about me should be wearing off... shouldn't it? My hand felt so small compared to his, and yet I kind of liked the way his fingers enveloped mine. It was a strange deduction, I'll admit, but it was the only one I was able to form as I was pulled out into the bright morning sunlight.
Knox continued to hold my hand, tugging me along behind him as he hurried to catch up to the rest of the group. When we had, our feet now consumed by morning dew and thick green grass, he let go. I didn't mind, glad to be rid of the strange feeling his touch had evoked. Surrounded now by tall trees and bright flowers I reach into my bag to retrieve my headphones and phone. I press one earbud into my ear, leaving one free in case Knox needed to ask me something, and load up my music playlist. I'm so engrossed in what I'm doing, scrolling through the songs until I find the one that I want, that I don't realize how close my partner has gotten.
I'm unaware of this until its too late, until he opens his mouth and scares the living hell out of me. "What are you doing?" he asks innocently, his voice right in my ear, his chin brushing my shoulder as he spoke.
I let out a yelp, sounding much more girly than I would have liked, my feet becoming entangled in themselves in such a way that I lose my balance and fall flat on my ass. I hear laughter and look over to find about five or six people pointing at me, their none too quiet snickering carrying over on the wind. Theres that touch again, a hand closing around mine gently and a moment later I was tugged to my feet. My eyes find their way to his face and I try not to notice how close we are, hardly more than inches of space separating us, or how until now I hadn't taken notice of how good he smells. Like the smell of the air after a harsh rain, or the scent of wood burning on a cold fall night. The two swirled together, an enticingly wicked mixture that has my mouth suddenly dry and I take a step back from him, keeping my eyes anywhere but on his face.
"Are you ok? I didn't mean to scare you." he says but I keep my eyes focused on the flowers behind him. I nod, checking my phone to see that its okay, and start up my music. The sound of a violin begins to flow into my brain, calming me and soothing my nerves. After a moment I look at him, offering a weak smile in response.
"I say we look for cicada's first." I say, turning towards a rather tall tree not far from where we stand. It's exceedingly quiet this morning, no birds chirping and certainly no cicada's buzzing. But I'm sure we can find at least one or two.
Walking over to the tree, I listen hard, hoping to hear something chattering. When I hear nothing, I turn to look for Knox, only to find him just feet behind me. I'm distracted for a moment by the way the sunlight hits him, reflecting off his hair in such a way that it appears brown instead of black. Regaining my composure, I point up into the tree.
"I, um... You're taller than me... could you give me a boost?" I ask lamely, sincerely hoping I could keep my staring to a minimum for the sake of my dignity.
"You want me to help you climb a tree?" Knox said slowly, each word coated in confusion.
"Yes, I'm too short to reach the branches." I explain, gesturing to the lowest branches that were at least a foot taller than I could reach- even if I extended arms all the way and stood on my toes. "I can't hear any cicadas, but maybe there are some hiding amongst the leaves."
Now that I said it aloud it sounded a bit stupid. I shake my head, turning away from the tree towards the open field where the rest of our class was goofing off. "Actually... Never mind." I mumble, dropping my gaze to the ground as I usually do when I walk.
A pair of hands is suddenly gripping my sides and before I have a chance to question what is happening my feet leave the ground. I squeak, the world swirling around me and close my eyes in fear. I hate heights. Dear God do I hate heights. In my terror I grab onto the closest thing, which just so happened to be one of the hands holding onto my waist. When that hand suddenly leaves my grasp I panic. To my surprise, when I pry my eyelids apart I find myself sitting on Knoxs shoulder. His hands had left my sides though one lingered just above my knee.
He chuckles and I look down at him to see him smirking up at me. "I didn't say 'no'..." He says, taking a few steps forward until we stood beneath the tree again. "Think you can reach the branches now?"
I glance at the ground, much too far away for my liking, then back up at the branches only inches from my face. Swallowing back the lump in my throat, I do my best to ignore the weakness I felt in my knees. "Yeah... I think.. I think I can reach." I answer, feeling queasy, holding onto the back of his shirt with a death grip.
The hand on my leg tightens, for what reason I was unsure. "You alright?"
Not trusting my voice at the moment I nod, hoping he wouldn't catch on.
"Uh-huh... Yeah, that nod was really convincing." He says with a snort. I watch his face anxiously, seeing amusement turn to surprise. "You're afraid of heights, aren't you?"
"No I'm not!" I squeak, feeling very tempted to smack him across the back of his head.
I felt our weight shift suddenly as Knox leaned precariously to the side. My lip clenched painfully between my teeth was the only thing preventing me from squealing in fright. Feeling the world return to its less wobbly state, I release my lip- taking a shaky breath to clear my head.
"Maybe it's just me but you sure seem afraid of heights."
"Just put me down." I growl, desperate to be back on solid ground. Chuckling under his breath, Knox nodded before slowly, and carefully, lowering me back to the grass. Back on my feet, and feeling much more confident, I glare at my giant of a partner.
"What happened to 'I didn't mean to scare you'?" I ask, settling my hands on my hips.
"How was I supposed to know that you're afraid of heights!"
"Oh puh-leez! In case you haven't noticed, you freakishly tall man, but... I'm only five foot. Of course I'm afraid of heights!" Exasperated and amused by my own words, I can't hold back my unflattering snort.
"Damn, are really that short? You're practically a dwarf." I don't miss the teasing way he says this and when I finally look at him he's smirking. Our eyes lock. I can't decide whether or not I like the way he's looking at me. The way he's smirking.
But never mind that. We were supposed to be working, yet here we were... What was it we were doing anyway? This didn't feel like an argument.
Sighing tiredly I give him a small shove, though with my small posture and lack of significant muscles he barely moves an inch. "Enough fooling around... So, cicadas are out... Let's go see what we can find."
I don't wait for an answer. I head straight for the long line of yellow and pink flowers that ran along the fence surrounding the tennis court. Even at a distance I could see some bee's and other small insects flying about. At the very least I could catch one or two for our project. Knowing Mrs. Ivy we'd probably spend the next few days collecting bugs- which left plenty of time to find something even if we didn't find anything today.
During my search I was vaguely aware of my partner. He remained quiet, occasionally saying something or tapping my shoulder to get my attention. In less than twenty minutes, even after crawling into the flower bed, we still hadn't found more than a tiny black beetle and a very irritated bumblebee. I'd been against catching the bee, but considering how much luck we weren't having I'd agreed with Knox.
I hadn't anticipated how difficult it was to catch these bugs. We had to capture them in our little nets and then carefully transfer them into a ziplock bag. Mrs. Ivy planned to freeze them overnight to make it easier to pin them later.
I sat with my back against the fence, staring sadly down at our buggy duo in their plastic prisons- trying not to feel sorry for myself. Why had I thought this would be easy? This was most definitely not easy.
"We're not making much progress are we?"
Turning my head I watch as Knox takes a seat beside me. He was almost as covered in dirt as I was, the knees of his jeans and his boots smeared with brown and green. I just hadn't thought he'd be willing to sit in the middle of a flower garden, half obscured from the world by the tall flowers.
"Holly?"
Hearing my name I come back to myself, shaking my head vigorously. "Yeah? Oh, um... No. I'd say that we are quite far behind the rest of the class."
He nods, his hair falling into his eyes. "Do you want to just hang out here for the rest of class?"
"I suppose we could... I mean we should probably keep looking but," I sigh, absently chewing on my lip ring. "I'd rather just sit here." Reaching over I hand the bugs off to Knox before bringing my knees up to my chest.
"Alright then..." My partner agreed, squinting in the bright sunlight. Right now I was dearly missing my glasses. Contacts had their perks but nothing beat transition lenses. We fell into an awkward silence. I was tempted to break it but had no idea what to say.
"I'm sorry for scaring you."
I could have gotten whiplash my head snapped to the side so fast. "What?"
Knox looked down at his hands, fiddling the bags. "I was just trying to get a reaction out of you... I never thought to ask if you were afraid of heights."
"In your defense, I did ask you to give me a boost." I couldn't let him take the blame for my inability to think ahead.
Knox nods, looking at me. "Yeah, you did. Why did you ask me that if you hate heights?"
"Cuz I'm dumb?" I supply without thinking.
"You're dumb?" The tone of his voice as well as his snort told me he wasn't buying it.
"Maybe? I don't know. I didn't think it through, okay? I was nervous!" As soon as I've said it I wish I could take it back. The disbelief in his eyes is quickly covered my something else, that smirk of his making itself known.
"You were nervous? Why?" He asked, bumping my shoulder with his. Well... This got awkward fast. Or at least uncomfortable for me. Knox seemed completely at ease asking me the questions.
"Do I really need a reason?" Another sigh. "I don't know... I'm just not used to the attention. You asked me if I have any friends, and I told you I didn't... So why wouldn't it make me nervous that you can't seem to leave me alone?"
The smirk is gone in an instant, replaced by a frown. "Am I really that much of an annoyance? Damn, if you want me to leave you alone, I'll leave you alone." He says, tossing the bugs at me and moving to get out of the flower bed.
Me and my big mouth. It all happened so fast I didn't have a chance to regret it. I grab his hand, clinging on just tight enough to get his attention.
"No, Knox, don't-" I catch his gaze as he looks down at me and immediately drop his hand. "I didn't mean it like that.. please don't leave." Biting my lip, I try to think through what I wanted to say so that I wouldn't say the wrong thing again. "You don't annoy me. I'm sorry... I'm not good at talking to people."
I hear him sigh, see his feet turn back in my direction before he drops down next to me again, his weight making the fence rattle. "If that's how you talk to people, I'm not surprised." He says, irritation evident.
The comment stings. "I deserved that." The uncomfortable silence is back but this time I'm even less inclined to want to break it.
"Can I ask you something?" He asks.
"I guess."
"Why are you so against me talking to you?"
"Can I ask you something?" I shoot his own words back at him, doing my best to not get defensive over a single question. "Why do you want to talk to me so badly? You only started here yesterday and yet this is the third time you've started up a conversation with me." I shrug, pulling my braid over my shoulder. "No one else wants to talk to me so why do you?"
"Technically I think this is like the fifth time I've started a conversation."
"Just answer the question." I laugh despite the nervousness I was feeling.
"Alright, alright. No need to get violent, Holly." I narrow my eyes at him but let the joking slide. I really wanted to hear his answer. At first I wasn't sure that he would answer, he just shrugged. Then he sighed, and started talking.
"Being the new kid sucks. The moment I walked into class yesterday everyone was just staring at me. All day it was like that. Everyone just staring... I felt like some animal in the zoo for the entire day." He stared off across the field, resting his elbows atop his knees. "Never knew I disliked people that much until I had everyone watching me like that. Everyone... Except you. Here are all these people who want to talk to me and get to know me... But at the same time there's you. Besides Isaac you seem to be the only person in this school who isn't eyeing me like a piece of meat."
Despite the heartfelt emotion to his words I couldn't help but grin. "No.. I'm pretty certain Isaac thinks of you as a piece of meat." I knew he took me seriously at first but as soon as his eyes meet mine they soften and he chuckles.
"Yeah. You may be right."
A whistle interrupts me before I can speak and I sigh. Using the fence as leverage I push myself up from the ground, realizing just how stiff my legs were from sitting in the cramped little space.
"That'll be Mrs. Ivy.. We should hurry before they all head inside." I explain, stepping over and around the flowers. I see Knox nod out if the corner of my eye but don't wait for him to follow. Once my feet hit the sidewalk I pick up pace, serious in my desire not to be left outside. I speed walk my way over to where Mrs. Ivy waits, holding the door open as my fellow classmates file inside. She smiles at me like she always does and I can't help but give her a small smile in return.
A hand closes down on my arm, stopping me before I can go inside. Before I can ask or look to see who it is, Knox steps around me. He holds the two ziplock bags out to me even as he took the door from our teacher, holding it open so she could go inside.
Mrs. Ivy thanked him, muttering about how nice a boy he was as she went in after her class. As I moved to follow Knox grabbed my wrist, holding me just outside the building. Confused, I tilt my head as I wait for him to explain.
I couldn't guess what he was thinking, but he looked like he was bracing himself fit something.
"Um.. Wow, I did not think this through." He mumbles, letting go of me to run a hand through his dark hair. "Alright, well... I would really like for us to be friends Holly. I mean, if you don't want to that's fine but," he trailed off, shrugging as he forced his hands into his pockets.
Had I heard him right? He wanted to be friends? Friends? With me? The excitement and joy that sprang to life inside me almost outweighed the fear and anxiety that I felt at the prospect of getting close to someone. Could I really afford to have a friend? Knox had already gotten me to break the near silence I'd held for over a year, he'd unknowingly forced me to admit one of my biggest fears... And now he wanted to be my friend?
"I would.. Like that..." I say finally, having to force the words out in my nervousness. They came out so quiet that I wasn't sure he heard them. But then he was grinning and pulling me into the building behind him. Even as I said the words I was regretting them. What was I getting myself into? What would being his friend entail? Was I even capable of friendship after all this time?
I'd been a friendless loner for practically two years now. I wasn't sure I even know how to be someone's friend. I couldn't see myself having friends again but if Knox was going to put forth an effort then so was I.
And there you have it! I'm fairly proud of this one, which is an improvement from the previous chapter which in my opinion had its good parts but was overall not that great.